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It's Your Kid, Not a Gerbil: Creating a Happier & Less-Stressed Home Paperback – August 1, 2011

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 272 pages
  • Publisher: Focus on the Family (August 1, 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1589976150
  • ISBN-13: 978-1589976153
  • Product Dimensions: 8.2 x 5.5 x 0.7 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (25 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #421,325 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Dr. Kevin Leman, an internationally known psychologist, radio and television personality, and speaker, has taught and entertained audiences worldwide with his wit and commonsense psychology. The best-selling and award-winning author has made house calls for hundreds of radio and television programs, including "The View" with Barbara Walters, "The Today Show," "Oprah," CBS's "The Early Show," "Live with Regis Philbin," CNN's "American Morning," and "LIFE Today" with James Robison, and he has served as a contributing family psychologist to "Good Morning America." He is the founder and president of Couples of Promise, an organization designed and committed to helping couples remain happily married. Dr. Leman is also a charter faculty member of iQuestions.com. He has written over 30 best-selling books about marriage and family issues, including "The Birth Order Book" and "Sheet Music: Uncovering the Secrets of Sexual Intimacy in Marriage." Dr. Leman and his wife, Sande, live in Tucson. They have five children.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

9 of 9 people found the following review helpful By Karl Dumas on August 23, 2011
Format: Paperback
Kevin Leman has written the book which should turn parenting upside down, and in the process strengthen the family. The title, It's Your Kid, Not a Gerbil says it all.
For years we've heard that we have to get our kids on the fast track, they have to be involved in sports and arts; they should have study time and develop good study habits. And that's all good stuff, but there's a limit. Leman reminds us that at some point we have to say no to the `good' in favor of the `better'.
Gerbils get in the little wheel, expend a lot of energy going in circles, and end up going nowhere. All too often it seems like we want our kids to get on that wheel and run nonstop. But what's the cost?. Yes, we want the kids to develop good study habits, social skills and everything else, but when the kids are pushed so that the parents can brag about the accomplishments - it's time to step back.
Dr Leman points out that at some point parents need to step up and be parents. Spending time with our kids when they're young is ultimately more important than having them be recruited to an Ivy League school before they're out of junior high. Family time is more important to a child than all sorts of lessons, and most kids would rather have their parents love them for who they are and not just for what they do.
Leman writes with a blend of humor and wisdom that engages the reader on any number of levels. He points out some of the misguided attempts at parenting that we all make, and he offers some great techniques and skills that parents can learn.
One of the things that I really liked about this book is that I never felt put down for being a poor parent, but often felt encouraged that I am trying hard and there are ways that will make it easier for me to do even better at offering my child the best future possible.
You probably know somebody that needs to read this book.
5/5 stars
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By D. Kinney on August 30, 2011
Format: Paperback
Kevin Leman is at it again reminding us parents that raising a child is not rocket science. Being busy does not equal a fulfilling life. Sometimes less is more. Kids really just want more time with their parents not more stuff. Mostly the advice is common sense, but sometimes we need a little help making sense of it all.

Even though it was hard to hear, Kevin Leman tells us straight up that we are just too busy. We need stop trying so hard to make everything meaningful. Routine and rituals are meaningful enough. Some of our best childhood memories are not from big events but from an almost meaningless event that thrilled us like no other.

The one thing that hit me hard was that after a negative behavior in my child, I should respond, not react. I have been reacting a lot lately. With encouragement from this book, I see now that responding is a much better response. Yes, pun intended.

Tyndale has provided me a free copy of this book in exchange for this review which I freely give.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Pirate2240 on September 30, 2011
Format: Paperback
Finally a great parenting book that is relevant to this generation of both parents and kids that make sense from a Christian perspective. Both my husband and I enjoyed reading chapters of this to one another considering some new alternatives to problems that impact our family's.

Do activities rule your family? Do you have a superkid - or a super-stressed kid? Does your busyness keep you from leaving the indelible imprint you long to have on your child's life? Does next week's schedule leave you exhausted at the mere thought of it?

Most kids today can text faster than a woodpecker with ADHD. But do they have the relational skills that will bring them ultimate satisfaction and fulfillment? In It's Your Kid, Not A Gerbil, internationally known family expert and father of five Dr. Kevin Leman reveals the secrets to:

battling the 'busy hands are happy hands' myth

choosing activities wisely

creating an atmosphere you kids will love to come home to

capturing your child's heart...for a lifetime

Isn't it time to trade in the stress-filled SUV miles for peace-filled hours? The result will be happier, more confident and secure children...and a less-stressed you.

If you feel like me and at times feel like you've reached the end of your rope in how to deal with your kids, from school issues, homework, friends, social issues, technology challenges, and even how to balance it all from work to family time, then trust me, this IS the book for you. The best part is you can just dive right on in. Pick something that is relevant for you and your situation and see what the options are.

We loved the chapter dedicated to balancing work and family and it really hit home for us.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Christina Fox on September 20, 2011
Format: Paperback
When I was a child, I didn't have many pets. But I did have a gerbil. Gerbils like to run on a wheel that's placed in their cage. They run on the wheel over and over, yet never get anywhere.

The author of the book, It's Your Kid Not a Gerbil, points out that many families in America live like gerbils on a wheel. We run from one activity to the next, always feeling tired and stressed.

After I had my first child, I took him to every activity our community offered: story time at the library, gymnastics, mommy and me music, play group, etc. My baby was definitely on the activity wheel from day one! Over the past year or two, we've slowed down significantly. As they've gotten older, we've realized that they need down time at home as a family. It's one thing to have a little one go to one outing a day, it's another when they are in school all day and then have an activity each night.

The author, Kevin Leman, believes we need to get off the activity wheel and spend time with our kids. "Activities are like ice cream. They're great for an occassional treat, but they don't make for a healthy diet." Kids need a close relationship with their family, much more than they need involvement in any activity. In the end, it's not important how good they are in sports or how many clubs they were a member of, but rather who they are inside. It's our job as parents to invest time in our children to help them grow in their character.

One activity per semester is all Dr. Leman suggests for each child. And for larger families, the children may need to take turns doing activities throughout the year. This book really gets at the heart of our American culture and what's really important when it comes to families, activities, and the time we invest in our children.
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