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Jemima J: A Novel About Ugly Ducklings and Swans
 
 
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Jemima J: A Novel About Ugly Ducklings and Swans [Paperback]

Jane Green (Author)
3.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (775 customer reviews)

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Book Description

June 5, 2001
Jemima Jones is overweight. About one hundred pounds overweight. Treated like a maid by her thin and social-climbing roommates, and lorded over by the beautiful Geraldine (less talented but better paid) at the Kilburn Herald, Jemima finds that her only consolation is food. Add to this her passion for her charming, sexy, and unobtainable colleague Ben, and Jemima knows her life is in need of a serious change. When she meets Brad, an eligible California hunk, over the Internet, she has the perfect opportunity to reinvent herself–as JJ, the slim, beautiful, gym-obsessed glamour girl. But when her long-distance Romeo demands that they meet, she must conquer her food addiction to become the bone-thin model of her e-mails–no small feat.
With a fast-paced plot that never quits and a surprise ending no reader will see coming, Jemima J is the chronicle of one woman's quest to become the woman she's always wanted to be, learning along the way a host of lessons about attraction, addiction, the meaning of true love, and, ultimately, who she really is.

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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Yet another take on the singles scene, and from yet another British writer, this jaunty novel has one slightly new focus--the Internet as a dating device. "Bored, fat and unhappy" Jemima Jones is a hack writer on a small London paper, whose weight precludes both promotion (which she richly deserves, because she's smart) and getting together with the man of her dreams: kind, modest and gorgeous reporter Ben Williams. The Web opens a new world to Jemima, and when she begins an online correspondence with L.A. gym owner Brad, identifying herself as JJ, her friend Geraldine encourages her to send Brad a doctored photo of what she would look like if she were thin. Jemima joins a gym, goes on a diet and even becomes a blonde, preparing to accept Brad's invitation to come to L.A. Lucky JJ: Brad turns out to be a hunk, and the sex is great... but JJ senses that something is wrong. Meanwhile, Ben has become a celebrity "presenter" on British TV, but while the whole country goes gaga over his looks, he too feels that something is missing. By the time several coincidences produce a dreams-come-true ending, readers are fond of plucky Jemima, but somewhat tired out by her adventures. Green's determination to provide texture results in too many scenes that brim with London and L.A. local color, but fail to add verve to the narrative. Outside of Geraldine, who, surprisingly, is both beautiful and a true friend, the other characters tend to be stereotypes: Jemima's roommates, airheads on the make; the predatory female TV producer; the editor who offers Jemima a promotion once she is blonde and svelte. Though the concept is clever and nicely handled, the broad humor lacks true comic brio. (As the online initiated would say: it's not LOL.) Green does, however, capture the nuances and neuroses of the singles scene with a gimlet eye and an uninhibited voice. A bestseller in England, the book should also hook female readers here as they relate to Green's frank comments about body size and social acceptability. (June)
Copyright 2000 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.

From Library Journal

Green's superficial novel tells readers that although beauty isn't everything (the right man will love you for who you are, not your looks), a sensible diet and regular exercise can turn any fat and ugly duckling into a slim, tanned, well-dressed, and exceedingly attractive swan. Jemima Jones, 100 pounds overweight and possessing a definite inferiority complex about her appearance, has a desperate crush on Ben, the devastatingly handsome deputy news editor of the small London paper where they both work. After taking an Internet class, Jemima strikes up an e-mail relationship with Brad, a health club owner in Southern California, giving her the impetus to go on a successful diet and exercise regimen. Many pounds lighter, she visits Brad in Santa Monica, where she discovers that he is too gorgeous for words, that sex with him is better than her fantasies, but that he is really in love with Jenny, his immensely overweight secretary. Meanwhile, Ben, now a famous television star, comes to Santa Monica on work and, once he sets eyes on Jemima, realizes that he loves her, always did, and always will. Is this ridiculous, or what? In Green's hands, the "overweight Bridget Jones" subgenre of British fiction does not look promising. Not recommended.
---Nancy Pearl, Washington Ctr. for the Book, Seattle
Copyright 2000 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 384 pages
  • Publisher: Broadway (June 5, 2001)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0767905180
  • ISBN-13: 978-0767905183
  • Product Dimensions: 5.2 x 1 x 8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 12 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 3.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (775 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #203,722 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Jane Green is a bestselling author of popular novels. She has been featured in People, Newsweek, USA Today, Glamour, and Cosmopolitan. She lives in Connecticut with her family.

 

Customer Reviews

775 Reviews
5 star:
 (266)
4 star:
 (161)
3 star:
 (119)
2 star:
 (93)
1 star:
 (136)
 
 
 
 
 
Average Customer Review
3.4 out of 5 stars (775 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

44 of 50 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars Even fantasy needs believability., June 20, 2003
By 
This review is from: Jemima J: A Novel About Ugly Ducklings and Swans (Paperback)
Well, it has certainly been established here that this is a "love-it-or-hate-it" kind of book. :)

My own feelings about Jemima J are not warm ones, but as other people here have enumerated, with much eloquence, the same problems that I had with the book (i.e. the condescending and snotty attitude toward the overweight, Jemima's unrealistic weight loss, Green's tendency to tell us that Jemima and Ben are smart and lovable, rather than show why they are smart and lovable), I will not dwell on them overmuch. What I do find distressing, though, are the number of positive reviews that dress down the negative reviewers for demanding too much of Jemima J. These reviews are peppered with phrases such as "It's just a fantasy," "It's just fiction," "This is a beach read, it's not Shakespeare/Milton/Anna Karenina," etc.

I doubt that a single person who picked up Jemima J picked it up because s/he mistook it for Anna Karenina. This is a beach read, it is a sweet, lighthearted, confectionery read, or at least it is meant to be. Jane Green makes no bones about that, nor should she. We all know exactly what kind of story she meant to tell; the question is, did she succeed? If you loved the book, then yes, she did. If you hated it, then no, she didn't. I would hazard a guess that everyone who didn't like Jemima J, myself included, picked it up wanting to like it, wanting to read a fantasy about a goodhearted, underappreciated girl who gets all the good things she deserves in life. I know that I certainly wasn't looking for Milton, or Shakespeare. I was looking for a character I could root for, one who has an adventure and runs into trouble only to come through it a stronger, better person who lives happily ever after. Jemima Jones was not that character for me.

Even though this is a fantasy, there needs to be at least some kernel of believability in the story to make the fantasy work. Again, if you loved this book, if you were caught up in the fantasy, then that's great - it worked. But if the fantasy doesn't work for you, then no amount of admonishments to "lighten up, it's only a book" will make it work. For me, that point came when Jemima loses 100 pounds in less than six months by a combination of starvation dieting and overexercise. Now, everyone's diet-and-exercise experience is different, and what works for one may not work for another. That said, when Green tells us that Jemima is able to switch overnight from overeating to a regime of no breakfast/plain lettuce & tomatoes for lunch/grilled chicken & veg for dinner; that Jemima goes from no physical activity to doubling her new workout regime within a single month; that she suffers no cravings, or lightheadedness, or hunger-induced headaches, or stretch marks from rapid weight loss; that she loses five to six pounds a week for four months; and that, despite this marvelous change in her appearance, she is not thin enough at Ben's farewell party for him to notice that she has lost 40 pounds in two months...well, that stretches the fantasy too far for me.

Imagine that you are reading a story about a young girl who lives in a small town in Idaho. She has always dreamed of living in New York City. You know that she can live the dream if she believes in herself and tries to succeed. You know that one day she decides to go. So far, so good. But if the author then tells you that she drives from Idaho to New York in six hours, with no stops for gasoline, purely because she has the force of will to drive across country in six hours, would you still believe in her?

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47 of 55 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars Don't waste your time or money!, October 5, 2003
By 
Jennifer (Oklahoma City, OK) - See all my reviews
This review is from: Jemima J: A Novel About Ugly Ducklings and Swans (Paperback)
People that are Jemima J's size do not have the problems that Jane Green described. They can fit through doorways, and sit comfortably in normal chairs without breaking them. I used to be 20 pounds lighter and considerably shorter than Jemima J - so my body would have been at least as big as hers. I never had any of those problems. It's clear that Jane Green does not have experience with being fat - Jemima J would have to be much, much larger to have the physical problems described in the book.

And let's not get into the horrible stereotyping. Fat = pathetic, in Green's eyes. Oh, please. Fat people are capable of having social lives. I was active sexually at the height of my weight. In Green's world, this would mean that I was either allowing men to use me in degrading, humiliating ways because I was desperately seeking approval, or that I was with fat fetishists. This is patently untrue.

Besides the fact that her description of fat people is completely unrealistic, the plot is very weak. The climax? Boring and contrived. Better writing might have made the prejudices easier to take, but a poorly written, insulting novel? Don't waste your time or money.

Fat women, don't waste your time. It will make you feel bad.

Skinny women, don't waste your time. This is not how fat people live, think, or act.

Men, don't waste your time. It insults men too.

If you absolutely have to read this book, please check it out of the library. Don't give her any of your money. Read anything instead.

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30 of 34 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars Unrealistic and shallow, April 13, 2003
This review is from: Jemima J: A Novel About Ugly Ducklings and Swans (Paperback)
I liked the premise of this book and had high hopes, but was sorely disappointed. I'm not even sure where to begin on this book. First of all, it's impractical. There is no way someone can lose that much weight so quickly by over-exercising and under eating and remain healthy. The author even alludes to that fact, but the main character practically stops eating with no repercussions whatsoever! Second of all, it's insulting. People who are overweight may or may not have overeating to blame, but the author's comments about how one just needs to make a strong decision to lose weight and the pounds will melt away is ludicrous. More importantly, it perpetuates a ridiculous stereotype that people who are overweight just eat all of the time. It's just not that simple. Third, the author is painfully unsympathetic to her character. There is no reason that the reader should dislike this character - her main flaw is that she's overweight, but she's intelligent, thoughtful, and caring. She has some doormat tendancies, but that's hardly reason for the author to treat her with such negativity.

I didn't mind the premise of the book. I didn't mind the general plotline of the story. But a dash of realism, with a little bit of goodwill towards the main character, would have prevented me from seeing the book as a piece of .... I read the whole thing and hoped for some redemption, but it just wasn't there. I won't loan this one to a friend. I won't give it away. It's just that bad.
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Inside This Book (learn more)
First Sentence:
God, I wish I were thin. Read the first page
Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
deputy news editor, vanity case
Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
Jemima Jones, Ben Williams, Los Angeles, Kilburn Herald, Diana Macpherson, Santa Monica, Alexia Aldridge, Top Tips, London Daytime Television, Nick Maxwell, West Hampstead, London Nights, Broadway Deli, Jesus Christ, B-Fit Gym, Diet Coke, Kilburn High Road, Louis Vuitton, Third Street Promenade, Cut Glass, Hyde Park, Miss Aldridge, Solent Advertiser
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