or
Sign in to turn on 1-Click ordering
More Buying Choices
Have one to sell? Sell yours here
Tell the Publisher!
I'd like to read this book on Kindle

Don't have a Kindle? Get your Kindle here, or download a FREE Kindle Reading App.
Sorry, this item is not available in
Image not available for
Color:
Image not available

To view this video download Flash Player

 

Jewish Weddings: A Beautiful Guide to Creating the Wedding of Your Dreams [Hardcover]

Rita Milos Brownstein
3.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (5 customer reviews)

List Price: $30.00
Price: $23.35 & FREE Shipping on orders over $25. Details
You Save: $6.65 (22%)
o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o o
Only 2 left in stock (more on the way).
Ships from and sold by Amazon.com. Gift-wrap available.
Want it tomorrow, May 23? Choose One-Day Shipping at checkout. Details

Formats

Amazon Price New from Used from
Hardcover $23.35  
Unknown Binding $30.00  
Image
Save on Popular Books This Summer
Browse our Bookshelf Favorites store for big savings on popular fiction, nonfiction, children's books, and more.

Book Description

December 10, 2002
There is nothing more daunting to a newly engaged couple than planning their wedding. For Jewish couples, balancing religious and aesthetic needs can be especially tricky. Rita Milos Brownstein provides inspiration and practical advice in Jewish Weddings, a lavishly illustrated guide to creating a wedding that both honors Jewish culture, ritual, and tradition and reflects the lives and personalities of the bride and groom.

Beginning with a brief history of the Jewish wedding (including wonderful stories of barshert, couples whose love was clearly meant to be), Brownstein guides the bride and groom through the pleasures of the engagement party and Jewish bridal shower to choosing a ketubah (marriage contract), wedding ring, and invitations. She describes traditional Jewish customs and rituals, then suggests ways to personalize the chuppah, or wedding canopy; music; wedding programs; and even the chairs. Brownstein includes the joyous times after the wedding and gives the new couple tips on how to create a Jewish home and original ideas for thank-you notes.

Of course, Brownstein doesn't forget about food, with menu suggestions for an engagement party and a bridal shower tea party, as well as for the wedding reception and Sheva Brachas, the traditional week of festive meals following the wedding. Delicious, mouth-watering recipes for Salmon Roll with Dill Sauce, Green Bean Bundles, Potato and Leek Soup, and Poached Pears will please even the most finicky couple. Brownstein supplies tips on how to keep a kosher kitchen as well.

The book also offers glimpses of seven real-life Jewish weddings. From a jubilant outdoor celebration in San Diego, California; a dazzling New York City affair; a classic Hasidic wedding in Hartford, Connecticut; to an elegant affair in Palm Beach, Florida, these stories will inspire any bride and groom in planning their own wedding, no matter where they live.

Illustrated with more than 200 gorgeous color and black-and-white photographs, Jewish Weddings is an indispensable book for any Jewish couple.


Frequently Bought Together

Jewish Weddings: A Beautiful Guide to Creating the Wedding of Your Dreams + The Creative Jewish Wedding Book: A Hands-On Guide to New & Old Traditions, Ceremonies & Celebrations + New Jewish Wedding, Revised
Price for all three: $53.40

Buy the selected items together


Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Rita Milos Brownstein worked as a graphic designer and art director for House Beautiful, Good Housekeeping, and many other publications. Her first book, Jewish Holiday Style, was published in September 1999. Since then she has been a frequent speaker to Jewish groups around the country. Brownstein is currently developing a line of Judaica products. She lives in Simsbury, Connecticut, with her husband and two children.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.

Chapter One: About Jewish marriage

According to Jewish tradition, forty days before the conception of a baby girl, a heavenly proclamation declares exactly who the child will someday marry. Call it in vitro matchmaking, but that is how we find our barshert -- or preordained partner.

In this chapter we'll take you on a tour of Jewish wedding celebrations and traditions throughout the ages -- from biblical times, when both the bride and groom wore crowns of olive branches, myrtle, and roses, to early twentieth century weddings. You'll even get to peek in on modern-day barshert stories -- personal stories of finding one's true soul mate.

We'll discuss the Jewish concepts of love and intimacy here and their spiritual basis. And since Judaism never gives spiritual concepts and spiritual goals without practical advice as how to achieve them, we'll also look at the concept of family purity.

In planning your wedding, you'll find it is fascinating to look back through the ages and to see where the customs and rituals came from and how the couples that preceded you celebrated, even during times of adversity and persecution.

As you celebrate your special day, you'll realize it's not yours alone: The customs and rituals are part of the unbroken chain of tradition that is the Jewish people. They are a legacy from all who came before, to be enjoyed and treasured, and are now entrusted to you, as you take your place in the 3,300-year-old chain of Jewish history.

The Timeless Link: a History

The concept of marriage is as old as creation itself. Thousands of years ago, at the conclusion of Yom Kippur, the young women of Jerusalem would flock to the vineyards outside the city, dressed in white robes to attract suitors.

Times have changed. Styles have changed. So have many of the old traditions. Yet they are still recognizable, and the reasons remain the same. Today, as in ancient times, the wedding ceremony consists of two parts: The first, the kiddushin, includes blessings, the marriage formula, and the giving of the ring. The second, the nesuin, includes the Seven Blessings, the breaking of the glass, and yichud. In ancient times these two parts took place a year apart, somewhat like today's engagement period. But as persecution increased, couples would sometimes get separated, so the rabbis decreed that both parts of the ceremony take place at the same time, which is still the custom today.

Marriage is of such central importance in Judaism that in ancient times parents would provide for their child's wedding canopy when the child was born. If the baby was a boy, they would plant a cedar tree; if the baby was a girl a cypress tree was planted. Years later the trees would be cut down and the wood combined to create the wedding litter and its canopy that covered the bride. The bride was carried on the decorated litter through the streets from her parent's home to her husband's; this was actually part of the wedding ceremony symbolizing her new status. The litter was held aloft by community men of high social status. From this procession came the modern-day custom of standing under a chuppah. The bride wore golden embroidered garments that emphasized her status on that day. Since it was considered a religious duty to participate in such events, young students and their rabbis would leave their studies to join in the procession.

Today, wedding gowns and tuxedos celebrate the special status of the bride and groom. In earlier times, the groom actually wore a diadem, or crown, as a sign of sovereignty (although somewhat temporary!). Rabbinical students made beautiful woven crowns for the pair, of twisted olive branches, roses, and myrtle, threaded with stones and delicate strands of gold and silver. The concept is much like the photo of the young modern-day bride on the opposite page.

For a week or two before the wedding, the couple had an escort wherever they went, and were guests of honor at many parties and feasts. After the wedding, the groom was exempt from all army and community duties for one full year so that he could concentrate fully on giving his wife happiness. And for thirty days after the ceremony, the groom was not allowed to enter the bridal chamber without her specific permission.

A wonderful tradition born long ago still exists today: that of providing funds for poor or orphaned brides to cover the cost of a proper wedding. In European Jewish communities there were self-imposed taxes to establish and maintain such funds called hakhnasal kallah, kindness to the bride. Unfortunately, today there are many young women in Israel and other parts of the world in need of this assistance. Consider donating your wedding gown to an organization that handles hakhnasal kallah -- we have some contacts in our Resource Guide. It is considered one of the greatest of all mitzvahs to provide such joy and peace of mind to a bride who needs financial help.

During the Middle Ages much of the Jewish population lived in small, isolated villages scattered throughout Europe as a result of the Crusades and persecution. There was little communication between villages and travel was made even more dangerous by bands of highwaymen. Filling the void was the shadkhan, the matchmaker. With a combination of courage and psychological acumen, he traveled between villages arranging countless marriages. The matchmaker not only had to balance hopes and dreams with needs and realities, but was expected to have enough insight to know if the marriage would be successful and happy. The matchmaker not only ensured the perpetuation of the Jewish people, he was literally the glue that kept them together in troubled times as he traveled the dangerous roads bringing news and letting the isolated communities know they were not alone.

Life in the Middle Ages was so drab that a wedding was reason for the whole community to join in for a seven-day celebration that included feasting, dramatic and musical performances, jesters, and dancing. Today, at Hasidic weddings, the mitzvah tansel -- the custom of the rabbi dancing with the bride while holding a handkerchief between them as a sign of modesty -- grew out of these festive celebrations of centuries gone by. The lifting of chairs holding the bride and groom at practically every Jewish wedding today stems from this period as well.

Though large and joyous, weddings were not extravagant. Money was the usual gift, to get the new couple started properly. The wedding ring, so popular today, was, according to some authorities, introduced in the seventh century. There were also large and intricate rings owned by the community and loaned to the bride to be worn on a ribbon or a chain around her neck. Many had handcrafted gold houses on top representing the Temple in Jerusalem, and were inscribed with the words mazel tov for good luck. Today, of course, rings are made to be worn comfortably and every day, and the heavy rings of the past are in museums.

Another more ancient custom from biblical times is the bridal veil, which recalls our matriarch Rebecca, who covered her head with a veil as she saw her bridegroom Isaac approach.

Remember the ancient ways and how they have come to add richness and meaning to your own wedding: The processional, the dancing, the lovely meal, the chuppah, the veil and ring, and the one day in your life when you are truly royalty. Celebrate and practice your priceless heritage with your entire being.

Remember, also, that in addition to all the friends and family members who attend your wedding, you have an exalted guest. The Midrash says that God so greatly desires weddings that He even serves as a witness at all weddings.

Whether you choose to marry in a meadow or in a garden, in a synagogue or in a huge catering ballroom, the whispers of our ancestors are with you.

Made in Heaven

As the old saying goes, "There's someone for everyone." When you find your soul mate, your perfect partner, it's no accident, according to Judaism, it's Barshert.

The miracle of finding each other -- on a crowded subway train, at a friend's wedding, or through a formal introduction by relatives -- was not an accident, good luck, or even a smart "fix-up." The belief is that if God intends two souls to meet, He will, if necessary, bring them together from opposite ends of the world. The circumstances are orchestrated by God and the intermediaries involved are His messengers.

The last days before the wedding rush by in a blur of final details and arrangements. Everything else gradually fades into the background as family, friends, and re...


Product Details

  • Hardcover: 176 pages
  • Publisher: Simon & Schuster (December 10, 2002)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0743216075
  • ISBN-13: 978-0743216074
  • Product Dimensions: 9 x 0.8 x 11.3 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 2 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 3.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (5 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,072,709 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Discover books, learn about writers, read author blogs, and more.

Customer Reviews

3.4 out of 5 stars
(5)
3.4 out of 5 stars
Share your thoughts with other customers
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful
By A Customer
Format:Hardcover
Don't get fooled by the exquisite photography and tasteful presentation. This book is packed with information to educate and inspire any Jewish couple with a chuppah in their future! Ms. Brownstein presents a wide variety of wedding traditions from around the Jewish world--New York City chic to a simple but elegant West Coast garden party. From mikveh to mezuzah, she packs powerful Jewish wedding customs into 176 pages, finishing with a useful resource guide. A must buy for the prospective bride (groom and mother-of-the-bride too!)who wants to begin her new life with tradition, style and meaning!
Comment | 
Was this review helpful to you?
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Beautiful in content and style May 18, 2004
By A Customer
Format:Hardcover
While planning my (Jewish) wedding I found it very difficult to find a book with ideas on both decorating and Jewish customs. Needless to say, I was thrilled when I found Jewish Weddings. The pages are beautifully laid out--a pleasure to read--and full of clever ideas. The prose is elegant as well. I learned a lot about more about Jewish customs (and I thought I knew a lot) and weaved many into our ceremony.It's an amazing book for all Jewish brides (and their families), whether they are reform or orthodox (like my family). I've now given the book as a shower gift as well, and I keep it on our coffee table too. Ms. Milos Brownstein's other book it worth checking out too. I've used many of her recipes and tabletop ideas while preparing for the holidays.
Comment | 
Was this review helpful to you?
8 of 11 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars Heavy on aesthetics, light on substance May 18, 2004
By A Customer
Format:Hardcover
I give this book a B+ in aesthetics and a C+ in its ability to impart Jewish knowledge.

The author tries to combine a pseudo Martha Stewart "look" with some useful information and ideas for Jewish weddings, and the result is mediocrity. The photos are very pretty (much like those found in any of the myriad mainstream bridal magazines at your local newsstand), but I found the text hard to follow and not particularly informative. The author's background as a graphic desginer (not a rabbi or educator or even party planner) clearly dominated her approach to the book. I hoped to find historical context, information distinguishing Jewish wedding traditions from mainstream American traditions, and information further distinguishing Jewish law from custom. Instead I found full page photos of cakes and gowns and ideas about how your creative friends can decorate chairs as a gift to you. While some girly-girls might be into this stuff, as a prospective groom I found it mostly useless and often confusing.

To her credit, the author did manage to include a fair amount of information about Jewish laws and customs, but she failed to present it in a way that eases a bride's (and groom's) decisions about what to incorporate in our wedding, or where to find more information about specific practices. I did not find a single Hebrew word written in Hebrew in the book. Instead the author opted to translate almost everything, with the occasional translitteratation. The "chazen"/"chatan" confusion experienced by another Amazon reviewer stemmed from the author's further failure to distinguish Yiddish from Hebrew ("chozen" or "chossen" is Yiddish and "chatan" is Hebrew for "groom").

To sum up, if you're a girly-girl looking for a secular Jewish take on the Martha Stewart Weddings magazine, and you don't mind shelling out for a hard cover book, you've found your book.

But if you're looking for information about Jewish wedding laws and customs, with historical context and useful information, take a look at Anita Diamant's "The New Jewish Wedding" (revised), which my fiance and I bought after we returned this book. It lacks the pretty photography, but it's got the information we were looking for.

Was this review helpful to you?
Search Customer Reviews
Only search this product's reviews



Books on Related Topics (learn more)

Sell a Digital Version of This Book in the Kindle Store

If you are a publisher or author and hold the digital rights to a book, you can sell a digital version of it in our Kindle Store. Learn more

Forums

There are no discussions about this product yet.
Be the first to discuss this product with the community.
Start a new discussion
Topic:
First post:
Prompts for sign-in
 


So You'd Like to...


Create a guide