Customer Reviews

If I'm Jewish and You're Christian, What Are the Kids?: A Parenting Guide for Interfaith Families

5 star:		(1)
4 star:		(3)
3 star:		(2)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(4)

 

 

My husband (Jewish) and I (Christian) were given this book as a gift. We both read it indiviually and both had the same reaction: It is written in a very biased way. The authors portray the Christian religion as superficial. Case studies are used throughout to make their point- you must choose Judaism if your children are to grow up with a firm sense of self and belonging. (Christianity as the chosen religion does not seem to be an option with the authors). I do not recommend this book and neither would my husband. We threw it out.

I found this book to be very biased. I am Christian, my husband is Jewish and we are raising our children Jewish. If you are considering converting to the Jewish faith, then you'll find this book supportive and it might work for you. However, don't be misled into thinking it's a book for interfaith families. This book left me hurt, more confused and even a little angry. I do NOT recommend it.

I purchased this book without reading the reviews and I regret that now! The book essentially tells the story of two interfaith families, and how they coped with the spiritual education of their children. One family opted to raise their children as Jews, the second choose to raise the children as both , which led to little or no religious based education. This was quite disheartening for me, as our plan is to both baptize our children, and have a traditional bris or naming ceremony. I wanted to learn how to teach my kids about God, Jesus, and the bible staying as true as possible to both Catholicism and Judaism . Understanding this is going to be quite a challenge I was putting a lot of hope into this volume. Unfortunately, this book offered no practical solutions, except to favor raising your kids as Jews. At no point did this text offer any solution on what to do if both parents are very strong in their faith and want to pass that on. I am disappointed that a book that asks a simple question never really answers it. At one point in the book, the daughter of the 'both' family indicates she is sorry she isn't anything. She 'resents she was raised without a real religion'. That is so sad, and this book never explains what to do to prevent the result.
Try a different source. This one will only frustrate you.

This book was okay, though a bit superficial and not as in-depth as I would hope a book on this subject would be. I also didn't like how the two families were composites of many different families whom the author had interviewed, just for the sake of simplicity.

Apparently the truth contained in these pages, regardless of how it wasn't as in-depth as it could've been, offends people in interfaith marriages who want to raise their kids as "both" instead of picking just one religion. The two boys who were being raised Jewish seemed more secure and happy in their religious identity than the three kids who were being raised "both." Those kids felt more conflicted and angry, and confused over which religion they truly were a part of, which they ought to choose, why they weren't doing more in either religion, why they couldn't have just one religion like their cousins did. The oldest, Hannah, felt this especially keenly; she wanted a place to call home, comforting religious rituals that united the family instead of divided them, the type of religion she could turn to when the going got tough, instead of her parents trying to be two religions at once and in the process seriously dumbing down both. I wasn't raised in any religion, though my parents were both Christians, and I felt the same way she did; how come all of the other kids get religious holidays, memories, and coming of age ceremonies?

The librarian on duty when I checked this book out said she was in an interfaith marriage, and that she couldn't wait for me to return it so she could immediately check it out herself. The information in here may be more of a superficial overview than a real in-depth discussion, but it gets the point across well, as evidenced by how strongly some people feel over reading the advice to pick just one religion.

While this book does a good job of pointing out the conflicts/issues/problems that interfaith couples will face when raising children, I found it definitely biased toward choosing one religion in the home, and making that religion Judaism. If you are looking for ways in which to incorporate two religions in a home--skip this book.

Despite the "Do Not Buy" review, I did purchase this book almost by accident. While it did not offer any wonderful suggestions, it did start to ask the right questions. My boyfriend and I are beginning this journey of education, conversation and decision making and this did help formulate some questions. I did however find "The Interfaith Family Guidebook" VERY helpful and insightful! (also available here on amazon)

Andrea King's book challenges us to consider some thought provoking dialogue and considerations on the always controversial subject of religious upbringing in an interfaith family.

This book portrays how 2 families dealt with the hotly debated topic in 2 different ways and the outcome of those decisions.

As the author raises issues for couples to address, she in no way suggests there is a perfect answer. The book merely gets our minds moving in the direction of communicating with each other our feelings and thoughts with regards to some of the future decisions we might find ourselves facing as a family.

I highly recommend this book for interfaith families as a good start to communicating religious differences and decisions.

This book helped me to look within myself and sort through intimate and detailed issues that I never would have thought of on my own. It doesn't have all the answers, but it certainly brought me closer to finding them for myself. This book isn't meant to be the final word on interfaith marriages either, but it does compel you to address your ambivalent feelings about raising your children in an interfaith home. Consequently, if you don't agree with the author's point of view then at least you have come closer to understanding where you stand personally. It offers realistic, thought-provoking studies of two very different interfaith families. I have been ambivalent for a long time, and after reading this book I am finally beginning clarify my own convictions.

I was brought up as a Roman Catholic Christian. I was also brought up to respect all religions no matter how different from mine. I married a Jewish man, and we are starting a family of our own. Looking for guidance on how to raise a family of faith I picked up this book. Worst Idea Ever. Totally disrespectful of Christianity. Very disappointing. Do not take this advice.

I think this is good reading for anyone in an interfaith relationship. Altho it's meant to be comparative and pro's-con's for some of the options for interfaith families, it's pretty clear that it favors the "pick one" approach. But, it does make some good arguments that I think any interfaith couple needs to consider. My husband and I were leaning toward the "celebrate both and let the kids decide later" avenue, but this book helped me get a different perspective and there were some aspects I hadn't really thought about, that convinced me that picking one religion as our "official" faith might be better for our kids. I think it's common for interfaith couples to not really think about it, planning to "figure it out as we go" or just teach the kids both faiths so that their families don't have to get hurt. But it's really important to think about and talk about the plan before you are even engaged so that you know you're on the same page and have a decision you can both live with once things progress. I didn't agree with everything in the book but I'd definitely recommend it to anyone planning a life with someone of a different faith.