See, I have no idea what to put as a biography. I write about myself, so obviously I think my history deserves at least two volumes of 250+ pages each. So I'll try to keep it short:
I dropped out of college my first year so I could design and build websites, since it paid way more than it deserved (in 1996, HTML could net you a real salary. Insane) and I hated sitting through English Lit classes that forced me to read books I read when I was 9 (Huck Finn? Really? In college? What the hell...). I'd tell coworkers or friends at parties all these retarded stories that happened in my life, and it was suggested I put them out on the internets, so I did that. And people started reading, for whatever reason.
In 2005, I self-published my first book, Mentally Incontinent, composed of those stories. The book contained the highest-voted stories from the site (the first "crowd-sourced" book, to my or anyone's knowledge). It sold some copies and got the attention of some great people who helped me put out my 2nd book, also called Mentally Incontinent (but with all new stories). The editors at Gotham / Penguin think it's nice, so you should buy it solely on that merit. Or, read the whole thing for free (as well as the first book) at http://www.mentallyincontinent.com.
Outside of writing, I still design and build websites, I play football (not this season, since I'm all authory right now), compete in MMA tournaments and stuff, collect anything based on Akira, write comic books that never get published, and can totally kick your rear in Tekken. I even have trophies. For Tekken, not MMA or football, since I suck at those.