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Juliana's Pony: Total System Failure

Juliana HatfieldAudio CD
4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (14 customer reviews)

Price: $11.54 & FREE Shipping on orders over $35. Details
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MP3 Music, 13 Songs, 2000 $8.99  
Audio CD, 2000 $11.54  

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Songs from this album are available to purchase as MP3s. Click on "Buy MP3" or view the MP3 Album.

Song Title Time Price
listen  1. White Thrash [Explicit]0:15$0.99  Buy MP3 
listen  2. Metal Fume Fever [Explicit] 2:01$0.99  Buy MP3 
listen  3. Houseboy [Explicit] 2:44$0.99  Buy MP3 
listen  4. Road Wrath [Explicit] 3:36$0.99  Buy MP3 
listen  5. Let's Get Married [Explicit] 2:30$0.99  Buy MP3 
listen  6. Breeders [Explicit] 2:54$0.99  Buy MP3 
listen  7. My Protégée [Explicit] 3:42$0.99  Buy MP3 
listen  8. Total System Failure [Explicit] 3:12$0.99  Buy MP3 
listen  9. The Victim [Explicit] 2:50$0.99  Buy MP3 
listen10. Using You [Explicit] 4:11$0.99  Buy MP3 
listen11. Leather Pants [Explicit] 2:52$0.99  Buy MP3 
listen12. Noblesse Oblige [Explicit] 4:00$0.99  Buy MP3 
listen13. Ten Foot Pole [Explicit] 3:35$0.99  Buy MP3 

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Frequently Bought Together

Juliana's Pony: Total System Failure + Beautiful Creature + How to Walk Away
Price for all three: $20.72

Buy the selected items together
  • Beautiful Creature $4.49
  • How to Walk Away $4.69

Product Details

  • Audio CD (May 16, 2000)
  • Original Release Date: May 16, 2000
  • Number of Discs: 1
  • Label: Zoe Records
  • ASIN: B00004T9S1
  • Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (14 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #273,503 in Music (See Top 100 in Music)

Editorial Reviews

After recording her Beautiful Creature album, Juliana Hatfield wanted to kick it up a notch. Recruiting pals Mikey Welch (Weezer) and Zephan Courtney, the trio quickly banged out Total System Failure, easily the loudest work Hatfield has done since her days in the Blake Babies. Those who thought that the Massachusetts-based singer-songwriter has gone all soft and frilly will relish the festive feedback and fuzztone, which is also sure to alienate plenty of listeners. Welch and Courtney hold down the rhythmic fort, allowing Hatfield plenty of room to scream, solo, and scream some more. While certain to be compared to Hole, the spirit is closer to the Pretenders. It's not a consistent success, but Hatfield keeps it interesting with some bile-soaked lyrics ("Scary breeders, they have come with their sons and daughters / One by one, mean and dumb / Have another") and a healthy cage-rattling attitude. --Jason Josephes

Customer Reviews

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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
9 of 10 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Subtly unsubtle July 20, 2000
Format:Audio CD
From the opening track Juliana makes her point clear - she wants to assault your senses with noise. But to dismiss this album based on first impressions is to perhaps to miss the point. It can grow on you. I bought both this and Beautiful Creature at the same time, and proceeded to play the other album more. But slowly JP:TSF has started growing on me. Firstly, lyrically this album is really clever. Let's Get Married features great examples the typically laconic wit that's embedded throughout: "Torture the bridesmaids, make them wear lime green... Lie to the pastor, promise 'forever'... If you change your sweatpants I'll shave my legs..." Secondly, there's some good musical innovation and inventiveness here and there; belting changes in beat, edgy chord progressions, solid bass riffs and so forth. Unfortunately for those who prefer the little-girl-lost style Juliana, and for those still uninitiated to her brand of songwriting, these subtleties will be ignored as it's easy to be driven to distraction by the unsubtlety of all that distortion and those big fat riffy basslines. There's definitely a certain rawness laced throughout most songs, eg: "Metal Fume Fever" which reminds me a little of Nirvana's "Bleach" for displaced rawness. Despite initially preferring the softer edge of Beautiful Creature, I personally don't mind such harder-edged stuff, I've acquired the taste for Juliana's rugged sound; many others won't. Sure, it could wear your ears down if you don't develop the taste for it. Perhaps if there were more of a sprinkling of softer songs in between then some of the other reviewers here may have been kinder? I guess that's one of pitfalls of her dual album 'experiment', isolating all her heavier stuff on to this one album, making it potentially monotonous for some listeners. I say let this album grow on you, and reserve your final judgement of it until after you've seen her play it live (it should sound great live).
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Really grows on you February 13, 2004
Format:Audio CD
I'll start by admitting that I have been a Juliana fan since her Blake Babies days. That said, I've read a variety of reviews on this disc and have to chime in with my two cents to say that IMO, it is a pretty darn good album. It took me awhile to get my head around it because it is quite a departure, but it really grows on you. I have always liked the harder side of Juliana (when she rocks-it-up in a song), particularly because she has a such a great songwriting knack of weaving good riffs into material primarily comprised of lighter musical fare (which provided the riffs with extra impact, of course). Total System Failure is different because the whole thing is pretty much a full bore barrage of guitars. But as I analyzed why I liked it so much, I came to the conclusion that a big part of it was due to the fact that Juliana's staple sarcasm and wit come through loud and clear on this one. She takes direct aim at middle America and cuts it in two in such as way that is vintage Juliana. I prefer this one over Beautiful Creature (which is also good, but not as energetic that's for sure).
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars It's sly, it's sultry, it's rough and it's pure rock October 17, 2001
Format:Audio CD
While it's rougher and in ways simpler (emotionally) than her previous records, this alternate side of Juliana Hatfield (compared to Beautiful Creature) is witty and sly. Hatfield has more sense of humour here than most rockers and isn't afraid of torn edges or shredded ears. Pare it down, and this album is still as melodic as Only Everything and Bed, only with a different format: a mission statement that includes "a solo per song" and superb continuity through "limitations" in the effects department. Get it now!
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars ive got the fever July 27, 2005
Format:Audio CD
contrary to what other reveiwers have written, this is an excellent, inspired, well written, purposely sloppy album. its raw, sarcatic, dark and poppy, with toooo many undertones and hidden meanings to mentions. if juliana ever wrote a song with line of "i *something* you" it would have to be "i forgive you". she hates and... well hates, (cant say she loves that would just be lying) and it shows. its emotional and beautiful, angry and light filled. this album is excellent.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars The album I've been waiting for from Juliana June 16, 2000
Format:Audio CD
I've been a casual fan of Juliana's since her Blake Babies days, but have never been moved to purchase an album of hers before. I heard "My Protégée" once on the radio and thought it was new Veruca Salt. The announcer said it was new Juliana Hatfield and I was hopeful - I wondered if the rest of the album would be as good. Not brave enough to try the boxed set, I decided to try "TSF," after checking out the reviews and snippets of tracks for "Total System Failure" and "Beautiful Creature" even though reviews for "TSF" were not as positive. I am glad I was not scared off by the "joke" review, or the "what happend?" review. This is a great album. "Houseboy," " Leather Pants" and "Ten Foot Pole" in particular are sheer bliss. I'm not going to over-analyze. It rocks. Enjoy.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Juliana's heaviest CD- Cool side project January 29, 2003
Format:Audio CD
Maybe 5 stars is one too many, but that's all a matter of opinion. Juliana Hatfield is an awesome artist who writes and plays her own music, and this hard rocking disc will shock those who are only familiar with "Beautiful Creature". I've been a fan for years, and would say the only drawback to this CD would be a few songs being "too similar"?? It does rock, though and is worthy of purchase, definitely
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Ultimate heavy JH
This is an album without much variety - dangerous, but in this case, absolutely successful! 40 minutes of social anger - simple riff based songs, rock trio, no place for melodic... Read more
Published on January 25, 2010 by E. Lipper
5.0 out of 5 stars Crunchy guitar, compelling vocals
This is the Juliana Hatfield album that lives in my car. The guitar is crunchy, the vocals compelling, the lyrics brilliantly sarcastic. Read more
Published on October 24, 2009 by Kris Sellgren
5.0 out of 5 stars One for the haters
Upon release, this immediately became my favorite Juliana Hatfield album and remains so. This CD takes in the world, finds it lacking, flips it the bird, and still seethes with... Read more
Published on November 12, 2008 by Marshall Crist
2.0 out of 5 stars Lacking
2000 was a busy year for Juliana Hatfield, having released two albums simultaneously-- one was an introspective, wistful record full of acoustic guitars, samples, loops, and... Read more
Published on July 25, 2005 by Michael Stack
5.0 out of 5 stars Juliana's Hard Rocking Guitar God Self Breaks Out!
Great guitar solos... Lyrics filled with bile, sarcasm, sickness, & humor... An amazing counterbalance to Beautiful Creature's introspective vibe... Read more
Published on January 19, 2002 by Spike Utopian
1.0 out of 5 stars Not very good
Juliana's cool, but only when she blends pop with her "harder" edge. This album is a waste and an insult to her true fans. Read more
Published on July 21, 2000
2.0 out of 5 stars Should have been b-sides...
One of the foremost reasons that Juliana Hatfield is an excellent musician is her ability to channel her anger through her melodies without the annoyance of a full frontal sonic... Read more
Published on July 6, 2000 by PKHauntUS
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