Customer Reviews

Just a Word: Alzheimer's

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This is a beautiful story, simply written, easily read, that will touch your heart and keep you turning the pages as the story unfolds. It touches on subjects and feelings all of us have had (or will have) at one time in our life.

Realizing that the material things of the "good life".....a beautiful suburban two-story colonial home of her dreams, member of the golf and country club....were leaving her empty, Rose decides to pursue a more meaningful life of love and compassion.

She moves from NY to FL, builds an ideal life of love and sharing with a dear friend, only to have it crash around her with the hearing of the word "Alzheimer's". Relive with her the many different lessons she learns as she deals with Alzheimer's for the next fourteen years.

A different slant, too, on the Alzheimer's caregiver, who is usually a spouse or family member; for the medical and legal professions do not acknowledge the rights and privileges of a caregiver, if not a family member. A lesson to be learned, considering how the number of Alzheimer's patients is increasing, especially with the large "baby boomer" group.

I found it hard to put this book down once I started reading it and the picture of the main characters, plus a poignant poem, were a perfect ending.

Rose Lamatt covers the progress of Alzheimer's disease very well in her book, Just a Word: Friends encounter Alzheimer's. It's easy to read and easy to follow the story line. This book should be of interest to any and all persons involved with, interested in, or curious about any type of dementia, especially the mentally and physically debilitating Alzheimer's disease that seems destined to become a future epidemic. This horrific disease leaves its mark indelibly etched on the soul. God help us all!

My reading was interrupted so many times by rushes of tears, a brief breather, and then cleaning the teary salt residue from my glasses before starting to read again. She covered so many things that resonated with my experience of caring for my Alzheimer's afflicted husband. Oh, yes, there were times I smiled and even chuckled. Frankly, I think she did a magnificent job of telling the reader what life can be like with Alzheimer's, for both Caregiver and Victim. I capitalize both words for I believe they deserve the category of "Proper Noun: a noun that designates a particular being or thing...." Of course, that's my personal opinion and unless an English critic has ever experienced being around AD, the words would immediately revert to common nouns.

Ms. Lamatt wrote her book in an easy to follow, easy to read manner. The protagonist characters were likable and believable. She was even rather gracious with her antagonists; more so than I would have been. As I read about the length of time her friend, Carol, had to endure the suffering and the indignities imposed throughout that time by understaffed and, at times, uncaring personnel, I shuddered. My heart ached for the long time endurance in caring for Carol, along with Ms. Lamatt's own personal health problems.

An enlightening, yet heartrending, story.

Thank you so much for your inspiring, heartfelt book, Rose, and for your courage in putting a real life face on the critical issue of understaffing and lack of specialized dementia training in most of our traditional nursing homes and dementia units. Many seniors with dementia are being robbed daily of their basic human rights to dignity, choice and quality of life as you described so precisely in Just a Word.

I could not put your book down and finished it all this past Saturday morning. I cried most of the way through it. You are an amazing woman and I praise your ability to put your feelings and emotions so effectively in words. Having also walked this journey, I recognize we have similar passions when it comes to the critical need to change the way our current system deals with this population of people with dementia and challenging behavior.

In my personal experience, as a caregiver for my own mother with Vascular Dementia and a label of aggressive behavior, I experienced, as you did, the lack of appropriate care options, that lead to her spending her last days overmedicated to "control" her behavior and make her "compliant" in her environment. This still remains vivid in my mind. In your book you describe with intensity the very real emotions of anger, frustration and eventual acceptance that you and Carol were prisoners of a broken healthcare system.

Under our current Healthcare Delivery System, The better care you provide,using appropriate higher staff ratios of specially trained staff including close RN supervision AND the more pro-actively you manage and "prevent" other acute medical emergencies that require high cost hospitalizations, ER visits and unnecessary testing, THE LESS YOU GET PAID. My continued experiences, doing potential resident assessments at nursing homes, fuels my ongoing personal mission to continue, alongside you, to advocate for these vulnerable people.

Together we CAN change the face of dementia care! Keep up the good work!

I wasn't sure I wanted to read this book about Alzheimer's since I knew it would be sad and perhaps bring back memories of my years as a caregiver. However, I did read it and I did shed some tears, but one word summed up the essence of the book for me: COMPASSION. Rose cared for her dear friend and grew stronger in the process. Whether it is love for a family member, a romantic love, or love for a dear friend, or even a beloved pet, compassion is the key ingredient to make caregiving sustainable. Rose spelled this out clearly in her touching, well thought out, and well written book. She survived the caregiving years of her life by maintaining her faith, her devotion to her friend, and by the occasionally needed cleansing power of laughter and tears.

In addition, I feel the author should be applauded not only for her courage to stand by her friend in the most dire circumstances, but also to write this book. I encourage you to read this book, if for no other reason than to prepare yourself for the possibility of a similar experience.

The Kindle edition is very badly edited. Some of the ideas don't even make sense. Sentences are run together, there are plenty of grammar mistakes, and the overall effect created is that someone didn't respect the product enough to ensure that it was presented well. In general, SUCH bad editing ruins a book for me.

Just a Word is more than a book. Even though Rose Lamatt did not intend this, the middle two thirds of the book reads like a wonderfully written three act play.

The play starts with the startling realization that the diagnosis is -- Alzheimer's.

The crushing realization that someone you love is suffering from Alzheimer's disease. The accompanying denial and angst that comes in with the verdict.

As the play begins the action begins to rise immediately.

As the Alzheimer's disease worsens in her good friend Carol, the action becomes almost frantic. I was surprised at how fast I was reading the words. The scenes were zooming by so quickly that I felt like I was in a car going 100 miles an hour.

Somehow the depiction of the characters became so real that I felt like I was standing in the corner of the room watching each scene play out. I could see the faces of the participants even though I had never met a single one of them.

The doctors, friends, support group members and Rose -- each and every one of them. They all had a body and a face

Rose Lamatt has a unique writing style. One thing that surprised me was her ability to end a chapter with a single sentence that encapsulated the entire chapter.

When this happened, I found myself putting the book down and thinking about Rose's words. Lessons to be learned. At the end of several chapters, I felt myself breathing a little harder, my heart rate was slightly elevated. I was thinking and feeling.

In Just a Word, Rose reveals many of her secret thoughts. She reveals the thoughts that millions of caregivers have from time to time but never say -- out loud. Never reveal to anyone. Those secret little thoughts that reveal what we are feeling and thinking -- these thoughts are rarely pleasant. The lament.

When this book/play reaches the climax, it is time for Rose to do what every caregiver dreads -- put Carol into a nursing facility. The description of the first nursing facility made my heart hurt. I saw the lazy, uncaring employees in my mind. They had bodies and faces.

I learned how difficult it can be to find a good, high quality care facility. I learned some important lessons that I intend to use should I ever need to face the same difficult decision. For me this education was worth more than the price of the book.

Ultimately, Rose yanks Carol out of the first care facility and takes her to a second. A wise decision fraught with an enormous amount of anxiety, guilt, and heartache.

It is at this point we reach the denouement. The final resolution as Carol dies and Rose must face the demons within her. Demons left over from 14 long years of caring for Carol, and carrying around Alzheimer's like a 1,000 pound weight on her shoulders.

I often wonder to myself, what is it going to be like when it is over? I had to think about that in some detail after reading this book.

The middle two thirds of Just a Word are a wonderfully written three act play.

I could easily envision this as an off Broadway play in New York. The play would be a wonderfully disconcerting depiction of the sinister side of Alzheimer's and the plight of the Alzheimer's caregiver.

The message within the message would help those looking at caregivers from the outside-in to understand what a day in the life of a caregiver entails. They could then multiple that by 14 years.

If Just a Word ever becomes a play it will be hard to watch. People will squirm in their seats. They will definitely cry. They will definitely think. They might feel Alzheimer's for the first time.

When they leave the theater I am sure of this one thing -- they'll understand, maybe for the first time -- that Alzheimer's is more than just a word.

If you know anyone who is a caregiver, friend, spouse or lover of someone with Dementia or Alzheimer's, you must read Rose Lamott's book, "Just a Word. Friends Encounter Alzheimer's". Yes, I wrote 'you must read', not they must read, although you will most likely pass it on to them, as I will pass mine to my brother, a caregiver.

I just finished reading this touching, loving story of a woman who had been a pillar of strength, physically and emotionally, who gradually was stricken by the unrelenting, devastation of Alzheimer's disease, and the partner who lovingly cared for her. I am emotionally spent, tears flowing as they did in many parts of the book, sometimes tears of sorrow for the heartache, sometimes for the pain, Rose's emotional pain and Carol's physical and mental agony. Right now the tears are sorrow and joy, something you will understand when you read the book.

I am not a good book reviewer. It would take someone far more qualified than I to properly review this book and do it the honor it deserves. I can only say, if you want to know better and understand the experiences of a dedicated caregiver, read Ms. Lamatt's poignant expression of love in "Just a Word"


Mary Bradley McCauley, author - "The House of Annon - 978-1-4116-1866-4

Is there purpose in the foregoing question? One might answer "It is both!"

I have written on the issue in the past and it came to the foreground the night before last as I was reading Just a Word by Rose Lamatt.

The story is about Lamatt, the caregiver, caring for her partner Carol who was diagnosed with Alzheimer's Disease (AD) and lived another ten or so years. I have not finished the book so cannot be precise. In the later stage Rose placed Carol in a nursing home when Rose could no longer physically handle Carol.

The first nursing home was a disaster. Although well rated in the state a friend who worked at another nursing home said this was the worst of the worst. Based on the lack of care, gross in their omission of providing basic hygienic care, Rose transferred Carol to the nursing home of her friend. In each nursing home Rose provided and paid for private care to supplement that provided by the home.

In the first Rose found Carol in the bathroom pounding her frustrations out with the nursing home attendant and the private duty attendant one sitting in a chair the other lying on the bed outside the bathroom, well within hearing, watching TV. She found Carol, incontinent, not changed when needed, found a dirty diaper lying in the hall for two days outside of the door.

In the second home service was a little better but there were still dramatic oversights. One such was coming in to find Carol in the bathroom pounding on and breaking the mirror.

After listing much of this Rose made the following comment on pp. 1277-79 (Kindle Edition)

I understand things are tough, but what's happened to, respect for your elders and the ill? Doesn't it mean anything anymore? I've come to believe Health Care is an Industry not a service. ... but it needs fixing, not with a bandaid, but an overhauling from top to the bottom. Too many generals and not enough soldiers. Too many suits and ties, and nice dresses, while hands on people are underpaid and overworked. When will it change? Order Just a Word at Amazon.com Book information:

Paperback: 180 pages
Publisher: CreateSpace (February 9, 2009)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1440475172
ISBN-13: 978-1440475177

I asked at the start of this essay "Is there purpose in the foregoing question?" namely "is health care a service or an industry?" This question in its asking so succinctly describes what I have lamented in earlier essays I have written.

I have posted part of an essay I posted on an [...] Message Forum this past April following my experience of ½ a month in a transitional care unit. Transitional Care is a euphemism that falls between and extended care ward of a hospital and a nursing home. It is in all ways a nursing home.

My Essay WHAT'S WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE? Is posted at MY ALZHEIMER'S ARCHIVE OF ARTICLES AND MEMORANDA [...]

I was in the best of the best of the nursing homes in my area. I was appalled at the service wondering what it must be for some of the less costly ones. In the essay I illustrate my treatment, or lack of it. I also question the system.

My questions of the system was where does the money go? It goes to the Heads, the Supervisors, the Consultants, the variety of programs that support the infrastructure. When all of that is paid there is nothing left with which to pay staff.

Therefore professional service providers receive minimal pay and aids receive minimum wage. In my experience in a "good home" at best no more than half the aids could communicate with the patients because of inadequate language skills.

In my home County years ago the County Supervisors built a new Court House. When they did they forgot to put in Court Rooms. They remembered good offices and great meeting rooms, but Courtrooms? Oooops, they built an annex.

We have some great well run nursing home but poor and cheap service.

Industrialization has diminished service; Rose Lamatt said it so well!

This book heart-wrenching and at the same time, filled with tenderness and devotion.

I consider it a "must-read" for any caregiver that feels isolated and alone while caring for a loved one. Having been a caretaker for my husband, who had Alzheimer's disease, I can attest to the accuracy of Rose's account of the the physical and mental journey she and her friend made.

This makes me happy when I receive a review like this from a fellow Caregiver.

Rose Lamatt recently sent me her book Just a Word: Friends Encounter Alzheimer's--the true account of her best friend's rapid decline after being diagnosed with Alzheimer's, and of the author's life as a caregiver. After reading (or should I say "crying") my way through this book, I decided I had to recommend it to all my readers as well.
I read and liked Still Alice, but it doesn't hold a candle to Just a Word when it comes to describing the wretchedness of Alzheimer's and of caregiving and of life in a nursing home after home-based caregiving is no longer an option. Just a Word may not be as polished a work as Still Alice (my editor's eyes kept making corrections until the story sucked me in), but this book will give you the real thing: Alzheimer's with poop and bruises and the constant anguish of those trying to love and care for its victims (unlike the sanitized version in Still Alice).
In all my reading on Alzheimer's, I have not found anything so powerful as this book to stir a desire to rid this disease from the face of the earth!
Marty D. (The Aging Mind)