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The Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child: With No Pills, No Therapy, No Contest of Wills Hardcover – January 8, 2008


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The Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child: With No Pills, No Therapy, No Contest of Wills + The Explosive Child: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Children + 10 Days to a Less Defiant Child: The Breakthrough Program for Overcoming Your Child's Difficult Behavior
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Product Details

  • Hardcover: 288 pages
  • Publisher: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt; 1 edition (January 8, 2008)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0618773673
  • ISBN-13: 978-0618773671
  • Product Dimensions: 9.2 x 6.3 x 1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (93 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #58,448 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Kazdin, director of the Yale Parenting Center and Conduct Clinic as well as president of the American Psychological Association, claims his method works with no pills, no therapy and no contest of wills. Instead, Kazdin uses a practical, science-based method of dealing with behavioral problems in children that relies on positive reinforcement and a reward system. Kazdin doesn't dwell on the scientific research (it seems the reader must trust him on this), though he claims his method works about 80% of the time with serious problems and therefore should have even greater success with everyday behavior glitches. He outlines a plan to help parents focus on the positive opposite (in other words, what they want the child to do) and then takes them step-by-step through a process of praise and reward. Though Kazdin's approach seems complicated at first, his easygoing and often humorous tone gently guides readers through an array of problem scenarios, including bedtime, tantrums, grocery shopping with a younger child, getting ready for the school day and homework. The author promises long-lasting results for a temporary investment in his practical, positive method; parents may be well rewarded if they give it a try. (Jan.)
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Review

"[Kazdin's] easygoing and often humorous tone gently guides readers through an array of problem scenarios...The author promises long-lasting results for a temporary investment in his practical, positive method; parents may be well rewarded if they give it a try." (Publishers Weekly ) --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

More About the Author

ALAN E. KAZDIN is John M. Musser Professor of Psychology at Yale University and director of Yale's Parenting Center and Child Conduct Clinic. He is 2008 president of the American Psychological Association and the author of many professional-audience books on child psychology and behavior published in dozens of countries. Kazdin lives in Hamden, Connecticut.

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Customer Reviews

Based on scientific studies this method was well written and easy to follow.
Jeannette
Use the methods and techniques in this book and your child's behavior will improve ... and just as important, your relationship with him or her will improve.
Mitchell H. Dickey
When I got this book in the mail, I sat down and read it in one evening - it is a very easy read and has lots of good example stories.
a shopper

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

92 of 93 people found the following review helpful By Amazon Customer on February 2, 2008
Format: Hardcover
This book has changed the lives of me and my children permanently. I only wish Alan Kazdin hadn't taken so long to write it! He was very busy doing good work, though, and obviously taking good notes so that he could pass it on to all of us.

We have been using Kazdin's Method for 2 weeks now and I am amazed by the results. Our morning routine of getting ready for school and out the door needed a serious overhaul. We hit rockbottom one morning that ended in a lot of yelling and I knew I needed to do something drastically different. My 2 boys(6 and 9) are now out of bed right when their alarm goes off at 6:30 am, dressed and downstairs for breakfast even before I can get it ready. They then get up promptly from the table, brush teeth and hair and have their backpacks ready to go for the carpool a full 15 mins. before they need to be. My 6-yr. old came down one morning and said, "You know Mommy, now we have so much extra time that I think we should make our beds before we go too." I was nearly too stunned to talk! They do all of this so that they can get points and bonus points to go to the library, stay up an extra 15 mins., get a small gift certificate ($5) for a store, etc. Kazdin makes sure you get the all important details right, however, before you implement such a program. You have to get it all right or it won't work! But it isn't hard and I really enjoy using the program and helping the kids cash in their rewards.

This book can help with some serious defiance/behavior issues, but I wish that it was aimed more at just general parenting too. I think all parents can use ideas when the going gets tough. I know that's when I'm at my worst. Now I feel prepared.
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80 of 85 people found the following review helpful By Derek Grimmell on January 24, 2009
Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
Alan Kazdin is one of a half-dozen psychologists who have devoted their lives to research and treatment of problem children. This book has been a godsend to dozens of parents I see in my clinical practice. In fact, I buy it in quantity, stock it in my office, and sell it to them AT COST so they can refer to it at home. I have gotten very good feedback.

Who WOULD benefit from this book? The answer is in the title: parents of DEFIANT children. These are children who are cognitively normal, not involved in crime or criminal threat groups, and not addicted to drugs, yet are defiant, argumentative, disobedient, and generally tiresome around the house. For the millions of parents who have ended up with children they just don't like, this book contains the best parenting advice available.

Some children have special problems, such as autistic-spectrum disorders, ADHD, sensory integration disorder, and the like. The bottom line is, any child who does not respond positively to the program in this book (fully implemented, not attempted halfway or half-heartedly) should be taken for a psychological evaluation to determine what factors play into the discipline problems other than parenting practices. For example, ADHD can't be parented away, but if it is PROPERLY medicated, then the remaining behavior problems can be parented away using the principles in this book or similar books.

For children with attention problems I recommend and use Russell Barkley's books on the defiant child and defiant teen, as Barkley has specialized in working with this population.
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66 of 71 people found the following review helpful By a shopper on February 18, 2008
Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
My first child is an "easy" child, but my second child MORE than makes up for it. I have struggled for years to try to "tame" her somehow. I've read dozens of parenting books and even tried the "supernanny" methods, and NOTHING has worked on my child. Timeouts, losing priveleges, even taking everything out of her room, yelling, spanking, you name it we've tried it, nothing has had any effect on her behavior at all. I am so relieved to finally find a parenting book that explains why none of those methods, and why punishment in general do not work to change behavior (except temporarily). This book explains what does work, and he lays it all out in excruciating detail so you basically can't go wrong. When I got this book in the mail, I sat down and read it in one evening - it is a very easy read and has lots of good example stories. I had to go back to some sections when I actually began to implement the method to look up certain details, but the book is very well organized so it was easy to find what I was looking for. The main thing about his method is positive reinforcement - yes everybody knows that - but this book explains how to do positive reinforcement correctly so that it actually works! I wish I had read this book years ago because it has made me and my family so much happier. I highly, highly recommend this book.
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Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
Just before writing this interview, I read that drug company Eli Lilly was facing some challenges with the drug Strattera, possibly because of the backlash to reaching for prescription pads every time a child hits a bump in the behavioral road. This book ties in with that news because it is touted as being an alternative to pills.

Don't get me wrong. I had at least one child (now an adult) who had what I truly believe is ADD....but we didn't rush to judgment on that diagnosis and it took a long round of observations, trial and error and other changes before we turned to medications. So I'm not ANTI-medication. I am ANTI "jumping to conclusions". We waited a good year or longer before we came to any conclusions.

One thing that struck me, even before reading the book was a fact found on the author's website, information about how the children he sees at his clinic are "younger than before" and are being asked to function in ways not necessarily appropriate for small children (or, as the author puts it, "asked to function well...in daycare" in ways they might not have to behave at home, in ways no small child can behave all day. Children are children and they get tired and whiny and have tantrums and don't often behave well in structured settings.

Now to the book - I loved it. There is a focus on being mindful about how to discipline children and to move away from techniques that don't work and often escalate to shouting matches, threats and harsh punishments. Instead, Mr. Kazdin focuses on proven (emphasis on PROVEN) techniques to handle the type of common - and not so common - challenges that parents face. I haven't read anything like this and I've read quite a few parenting books. I'm suggesting it to young mothers I know and who seem open to such suggestions.
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