Customer Reviews

Kidding Ourselves: Breadwinning, Babies, and Bargaining Power

5 star:		(3)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

This starts a dialogue on some of the issues facing dual earner couples. Clearly geared toward the 35-45 year old crowd. Younger women may feel alienated by some of the assumptions that she makes. A great place to start looking at some of the issues yourself, whether or not you agree with her final analysis.

For those brought up in a milieu that expected women to do primary parenting, this will be shocking and controversial. She argues that a main issue is whether or not women will let men take care of children. Whether you agree or not with the outcome - she brings up questions that we all should be asking ourselves about the nature of "fairness" and "gender equality vs equity" - as well as who is really holding back women now?

This is a stellar book and will especially resonate with women who have studied economics, law or negotiation. Mahony uses common frameworks (for instance, BATNA - best alternative to no agreement) to analyze the day to day choices parents make. She comes up with some powerful suggestions for change. Don't "marry up" if you want a career, marry someone who will not make as many professional demands on your family life -- maybe someone who makes less money. There's a radical idea for most professional women. Buy this for your feminist MBA friends.

It's too bad that this book is out of print and
(to judge by the few reviews) apparently not widely-read.
It provides what are perhaps the first and only
published guidelines for working toward economic and
political parity in marriages where there is a
part-time or full-time stay-at-home mom. Buy this
book first, before you read all the other books
on transitioning fronm workplace to home.

This book is an excellent combination of empirical research, helpful anecdotes, and forward thinking. I wish that I had read this book at the start of my career. Perhaps I would have made the same decisions, which were largely based on emotions and "good faith." But reading this book would have provided a healthy dose of rationality as well as helpful warning signs to watch out for when facing the challenges of balancing career and family life.