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55 of 59 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
The Adults Are All Right, September 24, 2009
Customer review from the Amazon Vine™ Program (What's this?)
My acid test for reading is dependent on one thing: CAN IT KEEP MY ATTENTION FOR 20 MINUTES. If I can get through the first 20 minutes, in all probablity the book will be at least 3* worthy. That said, this book is definitely 5+*.
A very rough synopsis for this book might begin: This is the story of the trials and tribulations of 4 children from an affluent suburb of NYC preceding the deaths of their ruggedly handsome father and their soap opera star mother. It takes the reader through their individual battles to survive after they are separated physically and how they prevail and are brought together again.
On the basis of my mini-review one might assume that this is a pretty melodramatic or sacharine sweet story mimicing the 1957 heartbreaker movie ALL MINE TO GIVE. One might also assume that the now adult kids have been cruelly traumatized by all the events beyond their control. Does this sound like a potential movie for TV? It should, but it isn't all maudlin and sappy.
As for family, this one may not be exactly traditional and certainly might be disturbing to some readers. However, it is an interesting family and these 'kids' do manage to turn out o.k.
The 5* rating is based in part upon the process used to tell this story. All 4 Welsh siblings have contributed to this memoir and their story is told from separate and distinct points of view. It is imbued with a fair amount of humor and a dash of sadness and it is in a certain sense their coming-of-age story. In spite of their physical separations from one another and a lot of rough patches while growing up, what really impressed me was how they managed to come together as a family again.
The writing style was definitely a plus for me. It was very casual/conversational. I felt that rather than just reading this, I was in a room with them and they were recounting the events that lead them to this point in their lives.
Interestingly enough, the soap opera diva mama was a real person. As a kid I used to watch soap operas with my grandma and was well-familiar with her. While the 'kids' might describe her as glamorous, my take on her tv persona was regal. However, I had no idea what had become of her. So it was with a lot of interest that I got a look at this lady through the eyes of her family and that certainly went a long way into buying into this memoir. However, ultimately it was the story and style which grabbed my attention immediately.
I don't always recommend books, but this one is a serious keeper.
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25 of 27 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Spectacular Quadruple Memoir, September 26, 2009
Customer review from the Amazon Vine™ Program (What's this?)
This is easily the best book I've read all year. I couldn't put it down and read it in two days despite a busy schedule. I laughed and I cried, and I can't remember the last time I was so moved by a story. The concept was amazing: four siblings recount life as it was before and after their patriarch's death. The writing is spectacular, and four clear voices emerge: Amanda, the rebellious elder child who seeks escape but tries to hold things together in her own way. Liz, the uber-responsible substitute mother who has a secret life. Danny: the happy-go-lucky charmer who turns hardcore delinquent. Diana, the lovable, youngest and most vulnerable family member who is literally separated from the Welches for a time in the turmoil and aftermath of their mother's death. This book underscores how vulnerable we all are, especially as children, and what family means not only in terms of emotional and spiritual identity, but also the tangibles of life: food, clothing, shelter, money. What can go awry when oversight fails, when four children are basically left to fend for themselves? The book doesn't shy away from painful realities:the struggles the family faced as new roles were created by necessity, the rage, self-medication, and resentments that people face without a safety net. The chapters on the slow decline of their valiant mother are real and painful. Tell the truth, and people will listen. The caveat that the truth is subjective at the introduction makes the story all the more compelling. The Welches are more than all right. They are survivors with a wicked sense of humor, and you will be rooting for them from beginning to end. They have succeeded in making their parents shine with life and vitality even though these charismatic figures left the stage far too early. The stark, bitter, brutal truths told in this tale are unforgettable because it so clearly reflects reality. The good, the bad, and everything in between...Life! Scars remain, but they march forward.
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13 of 13 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Great and engaging story; honestly, wonderfully told, October 14, 2009
I loved this book and read it straight through in one sitting -- 5 straight hours until 3am and could not put it down. Near the end I cried in particular for the injustices inflicted on Diana Welch as she struggles to come back to the family with whom she always knew she belonged. I absolutely loved the round robin of chapters switching between these four very different people and thought it was the perfect way to convey this very raw, sad, and honest portrayal of a real family -- two flawed but loving parents - not so great on dealing with reality in the first place -- who then make a series of choices, sending their children down a path that ends with the kids on their own or spread to different homes at such tender ages. That not a single note of this story comes off as over-privileged or whiny or even angry at their parents (or even all that angry at the woman who adopted and mistreated Diana) is a testament to how great the Welch kids did turn out, despite it all. Reading it as a parent of two kids, it takes my breath away too.
The writing in all sections is just flawless and perfectly toned to the different kids. You would never mistake a Dan section for a Diana one, or Liz's voice for Amanda's. And the two authors make that very tricky narrative device seem effortless. It is very clear-eyed and matter of fact, but heartbreaking at the same time. I just loved the way this story was told, so much so that I cannot imagine it being done as well any other way.
In some ways the things that happen to them are quite ordinary - wealthy suburban kids dabbling in drinking and drugs and sex, and issues of self-esteem and identity, screwing up in school, talking back and acting out - none of that is really new. But what is different here is the lens through which all they had to deal with life is so singular and lonely. Liz was watching their mom die while becoming homecoming queen, stealing the family car to get groceries because her little sister needed to eat, rather than go joyriding with friends, Dan was lying in a closet pretending to disappear. They were just carrying on, but the burden they shouldered without their parents love and stewardship, even if that parenting was sometimes screwy and misguided, is just heartbreaking. I remember experiencing so many of the same emotions that these kids sometimes went through, but the difference was I had a safety net and still do - I could retreat into the protection and love of my family. They were on a highwire - and then they were on that wire alone.
I am not an avid reader of memoir as I think sometimes the shiftiness of narrative devices becomes just so obvious in "agenda-driven" personal writing (see Eggers, A Heartbreaking Work...). I like the magic of fiction to make narrators colorful and see how perspective shifts in the art of storytelling. What I loved about this book is that with the storytelling device of all four Welch kids gave it the resonance, humanity and even humor of great fiction; it made the voices so rich and compelling. This book is just gorgeously done. What a gem.
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