Customer Reviews

Killer Condom [VHS]

5 star:		(9)
4 star:		(7)
3 star:		(3)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

This trashy masterpiece is based on a cartoon by the great German cartoonist Ralf König (he is still quite unknown outside his home country and especially in the US for some reason). Your typical hardboiled, cynical, chain-smoking trench-coat wearing Italian detective stalks the street of New York. Only this one is openly gay, and is famous for his enormous..."schwanstucker". At the Hotel Quickie in his district, an alarming number of men have lost theirs. Over-eager hookers are first suspected, but our hero soon discovers the truth when he goes to the hotel and almost loses his - to a condom with teeth! Who may be behind this fiendish creature, and how is detective Macaroni going to convince others of the existence of this killer contraceptive before it strikes again? Unlike most Troma films this film actually have a rather good and coherent (but extremely absurd) plot. It is a satirical comedy that is actually played straight for the most part. For being a European film it actually had quite a big budget. It is also interesting to notice that lots of famous German actors and celebrities clamoured to get roles in this film that would have made Hollywood stars run away in terror screaming "Career killer!!!". The bearish and openly gay actor Udo Samel who stars as detective Macaroni has previously played in famous German masterpieces such as Far Away So Close and Kasper Hauser. There is a tender (but funny) love story included too. There is no frontal nudity but there are some sex scenes that might offend. But if you are easily offended, why are you here?
The DVD version includes some nice animated menus, some Troma extras and a great comment track by the director and special effects supervisor. There are lots of funny anecdotes about the directors claiming to be making a documentary so they will get permission to film in famous locations, police officers closing off New York streets for hours, stunts that went horribly wrong, and all the gruesome scenes that were cut. "For some reason they cut a close-up shot here of the condom on the floor after it had just...fed. I can't see why. I think it was a beautiful shot". At one point there is a nice fade from a flashback sequence, into a reflection in a window, and then a pan as the actor turns and walks away into the distance. The director explains how he did it, and then with a big laugh adds "But this was probably lost on the average Troma viewer!" Alien designer Giger is included in the credits as a creative consultant, but he joined the filming so late he could basically only say "yes, that looks good" about the designs already made. The film is in German with English subtitles. Unfortunately you can't turn the subtitles off, they are not on a separate track but for what its worth, it is a very good translation. American viewers might find it amusing to see German actors speaking German pretending to be New Yorkers, but as the directors point out, that is what Hollywood does to the rest of the world all the time.
The second half of the movie is unfortunately less polished (relatively speaking of course) than the first because the makers ran out of time and money. Lots of scenes were cut from the second half, which makes some subplots a little confusing, but the directors admit that the film would probably have been even better if some more stuff had been cut from the last half since the ending manages to be both slowly paced and confusing. However, it is still a good film and I can recommend it if you are a fan of trashy entertainment.

This movie is one of the funniest I've seen. I loved how it pokes fun at those American tough-lonely-cop-in-the-big city tv shows. Now,eveytime I see the opening credits for NYPD Blue, I just couldn't help but laugh out loud. Many people had problems with the German script, but I thought it was one of its many appeals. I mean movies such as Chocolat and Enemy at the Gates are set in countries where english is not their native language and yet we didn't seem to mind about their "suspicious" english scripts.
The killer condom in the film is a metaphor for AIDS. Underneath the gore and campiness, there is a strong message in the film about tolerance and understanding. Detective Mackeroni's "uplifting" speech in the climatic scene sums it all up.
Overall, this movie is not for the faint hearted. But if the title "Killer Condom" struck you immediately then you will thoroughly enjoy this film like I did. A definite cult classic.

This movie has only one flaw...well, okay, more than one, especially if you're slightly unnerved by the title, but for those of us who have spent lots of time with Troma and know what we're in for, the only problem is the fact that you will hear "Killing Me Softly" by the Fugees (badly dubbed, to boot) over. And over. AND OVER.

Otherwise, it's lots of fun. It's always nice to see well-endowed bald gay Sicilian police detectives who speak nothing but German represented in the movies. In a lot of ways, and not just the rubber from hell, this movie is surreal; the fact that it's shot ON LOCATION in New York...with an all-German cast is just the START. Furthermore, it's obviously been written in Germany, because it feels a lot like a foreigner trying to be American in the script.

Still, the gags are immortal and some of the one-liners are hysterical ("It's...It's..." "It's exactly 30.6 centimeters long.") Pick up, especially if you love sick humor!

It may seem inexplicable.....I never believed this day would come.....No one thought it was more improbable than myself......

What's happening here? Yes, I'm getting ready to recommend a movie entitled "Killer Condom." I have divergent taste in film. I love the classics, experimental art films, independent and foreign films--highbrow stuff. But I also have a twisted side, I love a good "bad" movie too. As an adventurer, thus, I have collected several Troma titles--The Tox Box, Terror Firmer, Tromeo & Juliet and Sgt. Kabukiman to name just a few of the more recognizable DVDs. These are all films that I would recommend, surprisingly enough (at least to a certain audience). But for every decent Troma title, there are dozens of barely watchable ones. I knew "Killer Condom" was destined to be a disaster.

That's when the strangest thing happened, I enjoyed this movie. It is a genuinely clever German import! The detective story is a solid parody of classic noir. An actual plot holds the picture together, the performers are appealing, and the cheesy double entendres will have you laughing--not groaning. Then, of course, you also have the dreaded killer condom--so diabolical, so ridiculous, so toothy. It's a dream monster, a wonderful creation! You will cheer for our hero as he attempts to avenge his lost testicle!

Anyway, seriously--if this sounds like your kind of movie, I think you'll be surprised at how cohesive and entertaining this film really is. If it sounds terrible to you, I'm guessing you're not going to like it---head directly over to your copy of "Fried Green Tomatoes" and enjoy. KGHarris, 10/06.

"Police Hunt For Crazed Contraceptive." "One on One:Cop vs. Condom" Those are two imagined headlines that Detective Luigi Macaroni's straight-laced and straight partner Sam Hanks, come up with in Killer Condom, and they aren't far from the mark in describing the plot of this imaginative, hilarious, and very adult comedy.

Luigi, a gay NYC detective, loses one of his testicles to the title creature, but that isn't his sole problem. He has to contend with a former lover, Bob Miller, now a transsexual named Babette, who sings at the brothel where most of the castrations have taken place, and who is still in love with him. Babette comes out in an array of garish outfits, including a blue sequined outfit and long red wig, but at his most reserved, comes out in a blonde wig and tan outfit that recalls Dusty Springfield.

Luigi is lonely and burned out, as evidenced by his thoughts of New York and himself: "As a cop, you lose touch with reality. You see nothing but filth and scum." "...caught between the pedestrians, the fumes and busy streets. The streets are a stinking cesspool, a playground for perverts." He longs for his home back in Sicily. Some Italian music is played during these moments of introspection.

He has the best lines in the movie. He says of Phyllis, a student whose professor is one the first victims, "If she hadn't bitten down so hard, I'd have thought she had baby teeth." This is obviously before he discovers the cause of the castrations. He unzips his trousers before an unconvinced Sam, telling him, "What d'you think did this, a dust mite?" And on taking the case to a personal level, he says, "Nobody bites off a Macaroni's jewels and gets away with it. Nobody and nothing." Another is when he is stark naked, using a piece of hose to trap the condom. Babette tells him, "I'd get castration anxiety if I were you," to which he replies, "I'd get penis envy if I were you." His lines are delivered in a deadpan manner, and that only makes the dialogue that much funnier.

He plays a dirty trick on Sam, who is ordered by the beleaguered police chief to go undercover at a gay club, by stuffing a yellow hanky in his right trouser pocket as the only way to insure he'll survive without having sex with another man. What happens to him (offscreen) is funny. And it's a good thing it wasn't a red hanky, as Luigi lets Sam know.

Otto Sander, who played the Angel Cassiel in Wim Wenders' Wings Of Desire, has a cameo as Phyllis' father, complete in gray cowboy hat. I had to laugh upon hearing he is from Farmville, Oklahoma. I live in Farmington, New Mexico, and I often refer to it as Farmville or Farmpit. Both places have one thing in common: they don't have a pimp on 42nd street who stuffs his mother-in-law in a dryer and throws her out the window, as was reported to Luigi early in the movie.

There's a poke at the Republicans, as presidential candidate Dick McGouvern, cut from the same bolt of cloth as Reagan, speaks of God's morals. There are shades of Nixon, as he spreads his arms out into a V, and his demagoguery of making the country strong smacks of Adolf Hitler.

The condoms themselves, described as a cross between a "giant worm, jellyfish, and a piranha," are well realized. They squeak, coo, gurgle, and giggle, but they are vicious, with their rows of teeth. They are also jealous, as one hisses when Billy prefers a black rubber. And there's something surreal and funny about seeing a severed penis gliding around a corridor at top speed. The creatures were designed by H.R. Giger, unusual coming from the designer of Alien and the cover artist of Debbie Harry's KooKoo album. Then again, this movie is anything but usual.

It's interesting having a German movie about America, seeing German actors playing Americans and speaking German. They've gotten New York done to a tee.

Killer Condom is a comedy, but it's also a crime drama and a love story, with a touch of sci-fi rolled into it. Oh yes, and it's a twisted but wonderful movie. But thanks to this movie, I'll probably be afraid to ever have sex!

This movie is VERY funny, but not if you take it seriously. What's funny about this movie is that it takes ITSELF so seriously. Mix the suspiciously Teutonic New Yorkers, murderous condoms, horrible drag queens, and a genuinely sweet gay love story into one movie and you have one of the best examples of the Theater of the Absurd that I've ever seen.

This is one of the best cheese flicks I've seen (The Re-Animator/w Jeffrey Combs is my favorite) Anyway,if you like cheese, and can get past the sexual theme of the movie, which adds a little flavor to the movie to by the way( the drag queen is very funny! ) , you will get some great laughs!

One of the best parts is when some of the condoms go into the city and climb into one of the garbage cans in the park. A lady sitting on a part bench hears these strange sounds coming from the trash can. She looks in, and gets bit by one of the killer condoms. I laughed so hard, I cried! The VHS edition is ridiculously overpriced! It's definitly one you would want to add to your "Cheesy Films" collection.

What shocked me about Killer Condom was that it exceeded its low-budget expectations with a surprisingly intelligent and touching love story. So the effects weren't up to much? Pa! The central romance between hard-boiled detective Udo Samel and pretty-boy rent boy Marc Richter was genuinely affecting; the dialogue was spot-on and Martin Walz's direction (and Samel's performance in particular) were beautifully judged.

This is a really great film, but it's important to know that it's in German and has subtitles. It's based off a German comic book and in my opinion, they did a great job on this one!

It's often difficult to really address this film, as it isn't exactly one of the more classy films. Made by the same people as the "Toxic Avenger" it has quite a large number of facets worth exploring.

The main theme is a band of viscious condoms with big sweaty teeth dis-membering those who use them. Once that's been established you realize there is a myriad of complex and poorly connected themes. A inter-generational gay relationship between "Billy" (a call boy) and Det. Macaroni (protagonist and lead). There is a plot to destroy homosexuals as a preparation for Christ's second coming by means of jet from Rome to New York at midnight on Dec. 31st 1999. There is "Babette" the old trick of Det. Macaroni turned drag singer. Really, the film is a broken apart and overstuffed with as many messages as possible.

Only becoming more and more rediculous, this film's immense cast of bizarre characters just adds to the the experience. Yes, the film is horrible, but bizarrely entertaining as well. It's much like a car accident, It's just horrible, but you can't stop watching. If you are looking for quality cinema, don't get "Kondom des Gravens". But if you have ANY sense of humor, DIVE ON IN!