Kinky Friedman's Guide to Texas Etiquette: Or How to Get to Heaven or Hell Without Going Through Dallas-Fort Worth [Paperback]

Kinky Friedman (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: April 1, 2003

Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit! Delivering belly laughs, hee-haws, and downright slackjaw amazement, this hilarious guide to the homeland of George W. and Willie Nelson is the essential how-to for surviving in the Lone Star State. From strange Texas laws and the history of Dr. Pepper to "Texas Talk" (in which a "turd floater" is a heavy downpour) and final-meal requests by death row inmates, Kinky Friedman, "the oldest living Jew in Texas who doesn't own any real estate," provides an insider's guide that will be loved by native Texans and the rest of us poor devils alike.

Even if you don't know the difference between an Aggie and an armadillo -- or what's really in the back on Willie Nelson's tour bus -- you can pass for a Texan with the Kinkster's expert coaching. So grab your hairspray and the keys to the Cadillac and get reading!

Editorial Reviews

From Booklist

The commander-in-chief has called Friedman "a Texas legend," but the Kinkster hardly mentions GW a-tall, filling these pages instead with "Things You Would Never Hear a Real Texan Say" ("I'll have a decaf latte, please") and "The Texas Celebrity High School Football Hall of Fame," which reminds us that Tommy Lee Jones was guard for the Saint Mark's School of Texas Lions in Dallas. The Kinkster includes an invaluable glossary, "Texas Talk" (e.g., "'turd floater'--a very heavy downpour"); waxes poetic about the Alamo, the Yellow Rose, and Luckenbach; cracks wise about the weather, Aggies (Texas A & M students and alums), and armadillos; and quotes Willie Nelson, the Zen Texan featured in Friedman's 1997 mystery, Road Kill: "If you ain't crazy, there's something wrong with you." Interspersed with all the Texas ephemera are articles Friedman published first in such magazines as Rolling Stone and High Times, on topics ranging from the roots of Texas rock 'n' roll to the late Ace Reid, "the world's greatest cowboy cartoonist." Benjamin Segedin
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

About the Author

Kinky Friedman is the author of Kinky Friedman's Guide to Texas Etiquette and the novel Kill Two Birds & Get Stoned as well as seventeen mysteries whose main character is Kinky Friedman. He lives with five dogs, three donkeys, one armadillo, a million hummingbirds, and a much-used Smith Corona typewriter on a ranch in the Texas Hill Country. With any luck, he'll be the next governor of the state of Texas.

Product Details

• Paperback: 224 pages
• Publisher: William Morrow Paperbacks (April 1, 2003)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0060935359
• ISBN-13: 978-0060935351
• Product Dimensions: 8 x 5.3 x 0.6 inches
• Shipping Weight: 6.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (16 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #216,522 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

9 of 9 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Hilarious, especially for Texans, December 12, 2006

By 

K. Brantingham (Dallas, TX USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Kinky Friedman's Guide to Texas Etiquette: Or How to Get to Heaven or Hell Without Going Through Dallas-Fort Worth (Paperback)

I disagree with the reviewer who stated that Texans would not find this book amusing. I am a Texan and I find This book to be absolutely fantastic, hilarious, and honest. Kinky is not disrespecting people from the lonestar state, just having a laugh. He is proud of Texas and this book shows that in addition to making fun of things we make fun of all the time! Texans, you need this book- you'll understand it perfectly. Non-Texans, you need it as well, I promise that you will laugh.

12 of 14 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars A different Kinky twist, October 24, 2001

By 

Max Swafford (Texas Hill Country) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Kinky Friedman's Guide to Texas Etiquette: Or How to Get to Heaven or Hell Without Going Through Dallas-Fort Worth (Hardcover)

Kinky's "Guide..." is a bit of a twist for the author, speaking as someone who has read virtually everything he's ever written. I have to say, it's clever, features some very unusual pieces for the author, and as always, will have you laughing out every orafice.

13 of 16 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Like a "Best Of" Album, September 9, 2002

By 

"imzadi44" (Wichita, KS USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Kinky Friedman's Guide to Texas Etiquette: Or How to Get to Heaven or Hell Without Going Through Dallas-Fort Worth (Hardcover)

As a devoted fan of Kinky Friedman, I've got all his books and even listened to some of his music. Of course I loved this book. It's full of the little gems that make you laugh out loud - and cause other people on the plane to look at you funny. What I noticed (because I've read all of his books several times) is that this book is like a "Greatest Hits" album, in that it is mainly composed of the good snippits from his books. That is not to say I didn't think it was great; I bought it for the same reason you buy "Best Of" albums when you've got all the songs already because you own all of the band's albums: all the good stuff is in one place! Keep 'em coming, Kinkster!