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THE LAND OF PAINTED CAVES: A Novel
 
 

THE LAND OF PAINTED CAVES: A Novel [Kindle Edition]

Jean M. Auel
2.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (1,151 customer reviews)

Print List Price: $30.00
Kindle Price: $8.99 includes free wireless delivery via Amazon Whispernet
You Save: $21.01 (70%)
Sold by: Random House Digital, Inc.
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Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Thirty thousand years in the making and 31 years in the writing, Auel's overlong and underplotted sixth and final volume in the Earth's Children series (The Clan of the Cave Bear; etc.) finds Cro-Magnon Ayla; her mate, Jondalar; and their infant daughter, Jonayla, settling in with the clan of the Ninth Cave of the Zelandonaii. Animal whisperer and medicine woman Ayla is an acolyte in training to become a full-fledged Zelandoni (shaman) of the clan, but all is not rosy in this Ice Age setting; there are wild animals to face and earthquakes to survive, as well as a hunter named Balderan, who has targeted Ayla for death, and a potential cave-wrecker named Marona. While gazing on an elaborate cave painting (presumably, the Lascaux caverns in France), Ayla has an epiphany and invents the concept of art appreciation, and after she overdoses on a hallucinogenic root, Ayla and Jondalar come to understand how much they mean to one another, thus giving birth to another concept—monogamy. Otherwise, not much of dramatic interest happens, and Ayla, for all her superwomanish ways, remains unfortunately flat. Nevertheless, readers who enjoyed the previous volumes will relish the opportunity to re-enter pre-history one last time. (Mar.)
(c) Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved.

From Booklist

What began 30 years ago with Auel�s best-seller The Clan of the Cave Bear (1980), namely the phenomenally popular Ice Age�era Earth�s Children series, comes to an end in the sixth installment. Now a wife and mother, Ayla lives among the Zelandoni, the people of her mate, Jondalar, but she hasn�t forgotten the ways of the people who raised her. Ayla is training to become a spiritual leader, and her devotion to this calling takes its toll on her union with Jondalar. On their journeys, Ayla and her friends contend with earthquakes, a band of marauding rapists, and even an outbreak of prehistoric chicken pox. When Ayla and Jondalar get wistful for the days when they were alone with their animals, readers might find themselves feeling similarly. As was the case with The Shelters of Stone (2002), there�s not a lot of urgency in this final volume, but the millions of readers who have been with Ayla from the start will want to once again lose themselves in the rich prehistoric world Auel conjures and see how this internationally beloved series concludes. HIGH-DEMAND BACKSTORY: Auel�s novels have been record-breaking mega-best-sellers, with 45 million copies worldwide, ensuring that readers will clamor for the series finale. --Kristine Huntley

Product Details

  • Format: Kindle Edition
  • File Size: 3006 KB
  • Publisher: Bantam; 1 edition (March 29, 2011)
  • Sold by: Random House Digital, Inc.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B003O2SQO8
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • Average Customer Review: 2.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (1,151 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,320 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

1,151 Reviews
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Average Customer Review
2.0 out of 5 stars (1,151 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

1,232 of 1,267 people found the following review helpful:
2.0 out of 5 stars Wow... SO disappointing!, March 16, 2011
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I am almost 50 years old, and I was in high school when the first Earth's Children book (Clan of the Cave Bear) came out. I LOVED it. I was so excited for the second book (Valley of the Horses)which came out while I was in college... and it was even better. One of my favorite books ever. The third book (Mammoth Hunters) came out a few years later and I did love it... though I thought the whole love triangle was really contrived. 5 long years went by til we got the 4th installment (Plains of Passage), I was going nuts waiting for it... and I was disappointed. It was very, very repetitive, and over-long, and detailed to the point of tedium. But there was still a plot, and some conflict inherent in a long journey, and some exciting moments. I didn't hate it. TWELVE years went by til book 5 (Shelters of Stone), and it was so boring that I never re-read it (I have re-read the first 3 probably a dozen times in the past 30 years)and honestly I barely remember what happened. So I was thrilled to see this 6th and final book, but I was also worried.

Sadly, I was right to be worried. This is so disappointing. I barely care about Ayla or Jondalar anymore. I feel like Jean Auel painted herself into a corner by making both of them so perfect and so good at everything and so in love.... there's no conflict unless it's forced and contrived. 'Cave Bear' had all the conflict of the Cro-Magnon girl living with the Neanderthal clan... very organic conflict. 'Horses' had the fabulous juxtaposition of the two difficult scary journeys and then Ayla and Jondalar meeting and discovering each other. Again, very organic. 'Mammoth' had some natural conflict - Ayla meeting her first group of people and admitting her background, but some forced conflict (love triangle) thrown in. It wasn't quite as good of a book. 'Passages' was the same way... there was some natural conflict (the tribe of women, meeting the flatheads, the glacier), but not really enough... so too much time was devoted to boring details ad repetitive pleasures. As the protagonists' lives become more perfect, the books become more boring. And 'Painted Caves' is boring. It took me weeks to get through it (I remember reading 'Horses' in 2 days!). Argh... this series has just been so drawn out....there's no story any more. Nothing to care about. No-one to fear for or root for. It's plotless and character-less and just empty and dry. It makes me sad.

It seems like Jean Auel has no idea about 'what happens next' or how to keep the story urgent, or exciting, or even just interesting. (Why she takes 8000 pages to NOT tell any sort of a story is beyond me.) It's all blahblah Ayla is foreign and blahblah Ayla is exotic and blahblah she invented everything and tames animals and heals all and her daughter is perfect too and Jondalar who? And then it's all blahblah cave paintings and blahblah more cave paintings and blahblah description exposition blah. Then there's another piece of utterly contrived marital blahblah we don't communicate conflict. Culminating in blahblah Ayla has a Revelation and Teaches Her Wisdom To All.

Also? Her daughter's stupid combo-name gives me nauseating flashbacks to Renesmee (if you don't know who I'm talking about, count yourself lucky) which makes me want to gouge my eyes out.

BOTTOM LINE: Tedious, over-written, repetitive, and forced. A massive disappointment... but you may want to plow through it if you read the first 5 books and want closure.

Oh Creb, Iza, Durc, Brun, Baby... I miss you guys!
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511 of 527 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars What a ripoff, skip this one!, April 1, 2011
By 
Avid Reader "zeta" (Stockton, CA United States) - See all my reviews
Amazon Verified Purchase(What's this?)
I am a huge fan of the series. I Own the other five books in hardcover. However, this book is just terrible.
There are about 400 pages of retelling what happened in the other five books, go ahead and insult my intelligence and assume I've forgotten what happened in all five of your books, like if I had, I would have bought the sixth book?
300 pages of oooh a cave, look a picture of a bear, lion, horse, bison, mammoth.
50 pages of Travel, travel, travel oh look a woman with horses and a wolf, travel travel travel, oh look a woman with horses and a wolf.
10 pages of my name is, my affiliation is, I'm married to, good to know you. Every time you meet someone, ad nauseam.
And finally about 20 pages of real plot. You could have told the entire book in 100 pages, almost zero plot and most of that boring and tired. Someone jealous of Ayla tries to get even for her being better than them and they get their comeuppance. Oh dear Jondalar is with another woman he must not love me anymore, blah blah blah! Sound familiar?
And Cattails!!!! There must be eight places in the book where she details all the parts of the cattail you can use. Ok, tell me once, I got it especially since you've told me at least once in every other book you wrote.
Now if she had wanted to write a travel guide of all the ancient caves with picture in Europe, she should have done that instead of bore the crap out of her readers with it. And I paid $12.99 for this, on Kindle? Not even a tree version? I need my head examined.
DISAPPOINTED!!!!!!!!
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317 of 328 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars An Open Letter To Jean Auel, April 3, 2011
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Ms Auel,

I get it. You didn't really want to write about Ayla and Jondalar anymore. 31 years is a long time, and all you
really wanted to do was enjoy your golden years, touring Europe and looking at ancient caves. That's fair. But I've got to ask. If you wanted to write about old painted caves, why not just write a book about them? Your book can have a cover with a picture of a cave painting and a tagline "by the author of Clan of the Cave Bear"; I've a feeling that would help it sell. But don't take the material for that book, insert some occasional dialogue, and call it the finale to your celebrated Earth's Children series.

My expectations of The Land of Painted Caves were not especially high, thanks to the sharp downturn in the quality of the series after The Mammoth Hunters, yet somehow it still managed to disappoint me. Should you decide to call Painted Caves a frame job and write a new final book, here's my advice:

- Your book is some 700 pages long. I mean, OK, it makes it easier to fantasise about using it to bludgeon the characters to death for criminal idiocy once we reach Part 3, but your book only has maybe 100 pages worth of actual plot, so I'm kind of left wondering if you actually had an editor for this thing, and if so, whether they're now spending their unemployment check on hard liquor to help drown the shame.

- I imagine there are very few people reading this who haven't read your earlier books. You really, really don't need to recap EVERYTHING that happened in them. Did the notes you had out to remind yourself of stuff somehow get mixed into the manuscript? Even more disturbing, I recognised passages that appear to have been copied verbatim from previous novels, and even some that repeated the exact same information as passages EARLIER IN THE NOVEL ITSELF. Copypasta and novels are not a good combination, mmmk?

- Too many caves, too many greetings, WAY too many renditions of the Mother's Song. No, seriously. Cut them, and you'll singlehandedly save a forest. Wouldn't Ayla be proud?

- Part 3. O lawd. This was where you actually started to offer us a reasonable amount of plot. It's a shame it's also where the book stopped being simply boring and repetitive and started being irredeemably hateful. It's like you suddenly realised that you needed some conflict, and that maybe it wasn't such a good idea to make Ayla and Jondalar win at everything ever. So you manufactured some absolutely awful drama that made me want to vomit, then resolved it with some Sleeping Beauty dreck that only served to highlight the misogynistic overtones that had already threaded their way through this book. Women who pursue careers always neglect their families and pay the price, y'all. Even if a family is all they've ever wanted.

I want my money back.
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More About the Author

Jean M. Auel is one of the world's most esteemed and beloved authors. Her extensive factual research has earned her the respect of renowned scientists, archaeologists and anthropologists around the globe.


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&quote;
Selfishness, cheating, and failing to assist someone in need were considered crimes, and the society found ways to punish such criminals, but penalties were often subtle and inventive. &quote;
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Chamomile is relaxing and if you take it at night, it can help you to fall asleep. Lemon balm is calming, especially if you feel nervous and stressful. It will even relieve the stomach upset that sometimes comes with stress and it will help you sleep. It has a pleasant taste that is good with chamomile. Linden helps with headaches, especially when you feel tight and tense, and adds a little sweetening. &quote;
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Thefona. The young woman from the Third Cave had exceptionally good vision, &quote;
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