Customer Reviews

A Legal Guide for Lesbian & Gay Couples

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The book, A Legal Guide for Lesbian and Gay Couples, by NOLO press, offers a wealth of information for same-sex couples seeking to create legal protections for one another in a complex, ever-changing (and oftentimes unfriendly) climate. The terms marriage, civil union, and domestic partnership are quite varied in their interpretation and implementation. Due to the significant differences between federal and state laws, this book can't possibly serve as a substitute to the expertise of an attorney in your home state, but it does provide same-sex couples a guide toward legally protected partnerships.

This book is not a DIY estate planner, but, to its credit, it doesn't bill itself that way. While it provides guidance about what sort of protection gay and lesbian couples can seek, it does not presume to say there is a definitive path to those protections. The book recognizes there are many different versions of what a gay or lesbian family looks like. The book explores the varied ways we choose to organize our lives and our relationships. This is a strength of the book because no matter what your family circumstances are, or how you and your partner want to financially set up your relationship, this book offers information on what steps must be taken. However, to ensure that you have the security that you desire for yourselves and your loved ones, the book is always quick to recommend that you seek the expertise of attorneys (estate planning, adoption, etc.).

Another great strength of the book is that it comes with a CD that has numerous generic forms (wills, power of attorneys, etc.) that you and your partner can use. These forms can be used to save time and money on the path to legally protecting your domestic and financial partnerships. This book is well worth its modest price for the significant guidance, resources, and peace of mind it provides.

In September 2009, I reviewed Making it Legal: A Guide to Same-Sex Marriage, Domestic Partnership & Civil Unions. While that book contains useful legal information, it spent a bit too much space going into the history of legal issues for LGBT people, rather than a practical "how-to" approach which most readers would want.

Nolo's Legal Guide for Gay & Lesbian Couples (here in its 15th edition) is more useful in that respect. In addition to being more up to date, the book gives more details on varying legal statuses with regard to "civil unions/domestic partnerships" vs. marriages, and in general is a more practical guide.

Best of all, this book comes with a CD-Rom with ready-made forms for everything from partnership contracts, to Power of Attorney forms, to Wills.

As with Making it Legal, this Nolo guide is likely to be out of date soon due to rapidly changing marriage laws - at which point another edition will be necessary. Nevertheless, this book is a must for any same-sex couple. It will save many times its price in lawyer fees, and may help prevent a heartbreaking situation.

Are you in a relationship? How serious do you think it is going? One for the long term? Then this may be a book that you want to read. At the very least, it will definately make you think. All the laws affecting LGBT couples are changing rapidly, and while it's an exciting time for all gay and lesbian partners, keeping up with the myriad ways the shifting legal landscape touches your family life can be daunting.

This book give you a practical guide is updated with the latest legal information and legislation that will help you and your same-sex partner protect and exercise your rights, and make sound decisions as a couple.

Some the areas it covers include - making practical decisions about living together, planning for medical emergencies, making medical decisions for one another and taking care of each other's finances when one partner is incapacitated, domestic partner benefits and how to obtain them, buying property together, providing for each other upon death, and some practical and legal aspects of having and raising children, marriage laws for all 50 states.

As the laws are evolving and changing - and hopefully Gay Rights will be treated as `CIVIL RIGHTS' issue and its opponents stop using the various `Religious' defenses (which by the way - I thought the reason this country was founded was the separation of Church and State) - that's where all the Lawmakers, Judges and Court Systems and general public need to realize. It's all Civil Rights. Remember when women couldn't vote? Remember when people of color or different ethic origin were treated like outsiders and in some cases criminals - just because of their differences?
This book also has a handy section on write living-together contracts, a plan for medical emergencies, planning for your estates, same-sex marriages as applied in each state, healthcare directives and even some interesting details on domestic partner benefits.

Denis Clifford, a graduate of Columbia Law School, where he was an editor of The Law Review, is a lawyer who specializes in estate planning. He is the author of many Nolo titles including Quick and Legal Will Book, Nolo's Simple Will Book and Make Your Own Living Trust and co-author of Plan Your Estate and A Legal Guide for Lesbian and Gay Couples. He has been interviewed by such major media as The New York Times, Los Angeles Times, and Money Magazine.
The writers are Frederick Hertz who is a practicing attorney and the author of Legal Affairs: Essential Advice for Same-Sex Couples (Owl Books) and co-author of Nolo's The Living Together Kit and A Legal Guide for Lesbian and Gay Couples. Hayden Curry, a graduate of Yale University who received his law degree from the University of Virginia, trained as a poverty lawyer and spent two years working with migrant workers in rural Florida. He moved to California in 1969 and worked in a legal services office in East Oakland. After leaving legal services, he worked as a law partner with Denis Clifford for several years and helped write A Legal Guide for Lesbian and Gay Couples. A proud participant of the Bay Area's gay community, Hayden died of AIDS in 1991.

Another plus - this edition contains the CR-ROM of handy forms and agreements that you can modify or adapt for your own personal needs/arrangements. They are in word documents (.rtf) - so you can adapt them quickly. Nice to have for some easy references.

The only real downside is that as the laws change - the book will have to be updated and revised on a yearly basis. The law can't seem to make up its mind on any `Civil Rights' issues. (Don't get me started!)

The book was a quick read for me and gave more insight to things to be aware of in this changing economic and social storm we are riding now in the first few decades of the 21st century. This book is something I would keep as great reference book for things you would never think of you need to consider. Add this one to you collection! 6-11-10

One of the challenges that LGTB people face when entering into a relationship with someone of teh same sex is that American law favors legally recognized familial bonds. Under US law, blood is thicker than almost every other thing, aside from marriage between a man and a woman. This leaves LGBT couples exposed to a lack of protection afforded to all others, including the rights for partners to control the medical care for their other halfs, rights of inheritence, and even divsision of property in the case where these couples break up.

Nolo's "Legal Guide for Lesbian and Gay Couples" is an approachable basic guide, written in simple English, for same sex couples. It walks unmarried partners through the ADDITIONAL hoops that American society forces us to navigate because they they are afraid and unwilling to recognize our committed relationships. Beyond just a book of simple wills and agreements, this volume also speaks to couples in a logical fashion and inserts "context" into the whys and hows to draft the necessary documents needs in the event of life cycle issues, and those documents that proactive deal with the potential end of a relationship.

In addition to the examples of how documents should be written, the NOLO series also provides purchasers with a CD-ROM of sample, simple documents that can be used if you and your significant other can't afford a lawyer, or would prefer to have a more hands on approach to creating your documents.

This one word of caution: I am not a an attorney, nor am I licensed to practice law by any US state, so I can't vouch for the legal-ness, if you will, of the documents. I can tell you that after looking at the documents, as a layman, they are written to be very basic. I would encourage anyone with questions about the viability of these documents in your jurisdiction to contact an attorney who is familiar with same sex couples and family law to have your questions answered by a licensed attorney.

Remember, none of us wants to be denied the right to be with our loved ones, or marginalized by family members who are bigoted or greedy, in the event of a crisis. Couples never start off a relationship with the intent to have things go wrong, but they do. Consider this book as one "must have" to avoid problems down the road.

Bought to help consul friends who were having difficulties in choosing/executing various options. Found it a great help. Very informative. I found it very useful for 'straights' to understand many of the legal options in much more depth. Indexed well and contains a nice overview of topics with enough depth to grab the major concepts.

These days, we hear a lot about equal rights for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender citizens. From same-sex marriage to the right of gays to serve openly in the military, LGBT issues are front page news. The LGBT community can congratulate itself for the progress they've made by emerging from the silent shadows to which society banished them for too long, to proudly embracing their sexuality and demanding equal treatment under the law.

In a note preceding the 15th edition of A Legal Guide for Lesbian and Gay Couples, Nola's publisher admits to resisting the idea for the book when it was first proposed in 1980, believing that same-sex couples had so few legal rights that the result would be a pamphlet, not a book. Thirty years later, this edition is a reasonably hefty 332 pages and a revelation to anyone who thinks that gay and lesbian couples must simply accept discrimination until the states, and eventually the federal government, decide to recognize their unions.

The work of three attorneys, Denis Clifford, Frederick Hertz, and Emily Doskow, this guide is a necessary addition to the library of every gay and lesbian couple in a serious, committed relationship. There are chapters devoted to your rights in states that already recognize same-sex couples either with marriage or civil unions, but the bulk of the book is for couples who may be at a legal disadvantage in less progressive parts of the country. Still, you have more rights than you know, and A Legal Guide for Lesbian and Gay Couples is determined to help you claim them. Everything from estate planning, contracts for living together, dealing with landlords, medical issues, and adoption are covered in this excellent book. A CD-ROM packaged with this 15th edition contains numerous legal documents (Renting Together Agreement, Living Together Agreement, Will, etc) that can be modified according to each couple's needs.

The day may come when same-sex couples can exhange marriage vows and enjoy the full legal protection that heterosexual couples enjoy. Until then, A Legal Guide for Lesbian and Gay Couples can help you navigate the legal system and claim what's rightfully yours.

Brian W. Fairbanks

Every NOLO legal guide I have read is very well researched and written so the average person can understand it. This one is no exception.

This is a pretty good book and is a good resource for unmarried couples of all kinds. My partner and I recently had some of the documents in this book created, so I had something to compare to. By reading it, I actually learned things I hadn't learned the first time around.

I didn't give it 5 stars because there is a bit of fluff in some sections. For example "how we define our families." I didn't think this was necessary. However, most of the book was very useful and will continue to be in the future.

I applaud NOLO for clearly being dedicated to providing information protecting the civil rights of all Americans. Realizing that this is the 15th edition of this text is proof enough. I trust that all the legal and professional contributors to this resource hope there will be no need for such a specific subject in the near future. When all tax paying Americans are treated equal, we can all read the same resource materials. But, here we are, in 2010, and some people in this country still believe they have the right to prevent two consenting adults from being in love, celebrating their love, and living in love. Well, they do not.

Marriage is only one violation of civil rights when it is prevented merely based on religious beliefs. The separation of church and state is in a great state of ignorance. I am a man, and can walk up to a female stranger on the street, and ask her to marry me. We can then go sign a legal contract, and voila, we are married. Instantly obtain the benefits of being a legally married couple with tax deductions and rights denied to fellow tax payers. No chicken dance or church required. Religion is a CHOICE. So is the chicken dance.

This guide contains a plethora of info addressing the obstacles of living as an equal American, just because you are gay. Unbelievable amount of detail on areas a gay American may have been struggling with and some may have not been known until now.

With subjects such as adoption and parenting, the obstacles are endless, but can be overcome with the right guidance. This book provides a start to great direction, and worth the price for this section alone. But we go beyond with tips on buying a house, insurance, medical issues, financial investments, and everything any other couple takes for granted. Just because the couple is the same sex, they have to refer to this very helpful guide. And that is just sad and embarrassing that we are making fellow Americans jump through hoops just to obtain equality.

Keep in mind that the laws and limitations are being changed and adjusted so much that some of the information may need to be confirmed for your state. A convenient CD is included which is full of forms that can be edited and adjusted to anyone's needs, and not just same sex couples. This book was first created 30 years ago, with 15 versions to follow. I suspect this to be a minimum of an annual edition at this point. I highly suggest keeping up to date with NOLA and get notice to pre-order each future release.

The more people that stand up for civil rights and marriage equality, the more awareness the issues will receive. It is happening in many ways. Currently the movie "8: The Mormon Proposition" is getting rave reviews for bringing to light the fact that the Mormon church is responsible for illegally passing the vote against marriage equality in California. And other supportive ways, such as singers and actors standing up or coming out. There is a new song called My Reclamation by Sam Harris, that is worthy of the download. Supporting the fight for equality. Just a couple ways that media will be fueling change needed for all Americans. NOLA will have their hands full keeping up with the near future, so please do yourself a favor, no matter who you love, and become informed.

This outstanding legal guide should be required reading for everyone. Beginning with "Defining Family: Basics of Marriage, Domestic Partnership and More" (including historic milestones and information on a state-by-state basis), it is clear, precise, and above all, incredibly thorough, with solutions and sample contractual forms for virtually all aspects of entering into a relationship (and ending one), and any existing situations and unforeseen situations you might encounter while in one as well. It explains the differences between civil unions and domestic partnerships, explains the effect that DOMA has on them, the difference between state and federal recognition of your relationship status, informs you of your interstate rights as a couple and so much more information that everyone should know - regardless of your relationship status.

As Nolo editors have pointed out for 30 years in every edition (this is now the 15th Edition of this guide), they stress the absolute importance of having ANY agreement or legal contract IN WRITING. As the guide states, "If you do not reach an understanding and write a contract, there is a good chance that an unsympathetic judge will end up writing one for you." They state, "In every edition for 30 years, an entire chapter has been devoted to the details of discussing and drafting these contracts - and even though the marriage contract, or something similar, is available in some states these days, written contracts are no less important now than they were in 1980."

I believe that is the heart of this superb guide, and why it is replete with sample contracts (including a CD-ROM with updated forms to help couples create living-together contracts, powers of attorney and more.) Of special importance containing a wealth of information are the "Tips," "Special Issues," "Resources," "When To See An Expert," and perhaps most important, "Cautions" at the end of each chapter.

Kudos and major props to attorneys Denis Clifford, Frederick Hertz and Emily Doskow for creating one of the most helpful and comprehensive guides regarding many of the most important issues that virtually every gay couple seeking to legalize their relationship will encounter in their lives. And kudos to Nolo for their free legal updates, which you can easily find out about in the preface. And, as Ralph Warner, Nolo's Publisher and Cofounder states, "I'm very proud of the Legal Guide, but I look forward to the day when in all 50 states same-sex couples enjoy exactly the same rights as heterosexual couples, and we can finally begin to shrink this fat book." This progressive, essential guide is one step towards helping accomplish that goal, and until that vision becomes a reality, should be required reading for everyone.

Outstanding on all counts, and I would give this 10 stars if I could.