Imagine being held hostage by the Vatican and forced to translate ancient Greek texts when you don't even speak ancient Greek! Worse, imagine that there's a cabal in the Vatican whose goal is to declare Bushistotle, the mythical Philosopher-Warrior-King of ancient Athens, the true Messiah, replacing Jesus! But also imagine that you just can't bring yourself to support the folly of Bushistotle - declaring war and invading Persia in retaliation for a Spartan terrorist attack on an Athenian colony in Sicily - so instead of translating the texts you're assigned you try to smuggle out the true history of Bushistotle. Or at least the true history of Bushistotle according to you.
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About the Author
Steven Hanley holds a Master’s degree in Spanish literature from Columbia University. He has lived in London, Madrid and Singapore, and traveled extensively throughout the world. On his mother’s side he is descended from the Vanderbilts, but unfortunately for him he was disinherited when his wealthy great-grandmother ran off with the circus. On his father’s side his family has been traced to a group of 48 Albanian soldiers who in 1490 bravely fled the advance of the Ottoman Turks to Sicily, where they lived in abject poverty for over 400 years, until relocating to public housing in Queens circa 1940.
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
7 of 8 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
From BookWire.com,
By BookWire "BookWire" (New York) - See all my reviews
This review is from: The Legend of Bushistotle : History's Greatest Philosopher-Warrior-King (Paperback)
Only the rare novel manages to combine a sharp sense of humor with fast action and still serve as a modern-day allegory. Steven Hanley manages that task in "The Legend of Bushistotle," and he appears to do it with consummate ease.
Steve is approached by email to take up a position as a librarian at the Vatican in order to translate a newly found ancient manuscript on Bushistotle -"History's Greatest Philosopher-Warrior-King." Living in ancient Athens, the manuscript says, Bushistotle was known for his catchphrase "I'm a uniter, not a divider," but also for his penchant to destroy nations and foster "progressive live-and-let-live policies as he and only he could define them: out with the bad guys and in with the good." But the project is more Top Secret than it first appears to be, and Steve soon finds himself inducted into Cardinal Bernie Lei's Task Force B.S. project and held hostage inside the Vatican. The authorities also instruct him to translate the Greek manuscript with the specific purpose of speeding along Bushistotle's beatification. However, "cleaning up Bushistotle's record (and) spinning his pathetic history in a positive light to make him seem like a saint" is no easy task, considering that Bushistotle's follies included invading Persia in retaliation for a Spartan terrorist attack on the Athenian colony in Syracuse, Sicily. Hanley cleverly switches between the past and the present, detailing the excesses of Bushistotle even as Steve struggles to extricate himself from his dilemma. Throughout the plot runs Hanley's distinctive brand of wit; officials at the Vatican, for example, are called Irma R. Gorgonzola and Sister Mary Subjugation, and the ancient Athenian manuscript has been partly ruined because attempts have been made to clean it with Windex! The names of the other characters - Bushistotle, his wife Constantina, and his coterie of advisors: Cheneyon, Rumsfeldiavelli, Powellonius, and Ashcroftus - are just as captivating. But in the midst of this political satire, Hanley also manages to weave in a riveting storyline, speeding it along in the end towards an absorbing, truly satisfying finish.
5 of 8 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Great Satire!,
This review is from: The Legend of Bushistotle : History's Greatest Philosopher-Warrior-King (Paperback)
Perfectly satirizes G. W. Bush and the religious right, depecting them as the bumbling fools and hypocrites they really are, but that the world is just waking up to. We've been fooled long enough - about WMD's, about stealth Supreme Court nominees, about Rove and that bunch - but it's a lot better to belly laugh at them than it is to cry about them, even though that's what most of the country feels like doing.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
GREAT!!!!!!,
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This review is from: The Legend of Bushistotle : History's Greatest Philosopher-Warrior-King (Paperback)
It's one of the funniest books I've ever read. Witty and slapstick at the same time.
Totally worth the $0.39 I spent on it!!!!
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Inside This Book
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First Sentence:
It all started innocently enough, in a way that no one would have ever imagined: I was scrolling through spam from spammers who seemed convinced that my penis wasn't long enough despite the years I'd spent yanking at it in the darkness, when I happened upon a message from a Mrs. Irma R. Gorgonzola. Read the first page Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
amon zorobabel, green plastic grass, illegible text, yellow frogs Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
Sister Mary Subjugation, Sister Naomi, Dudley the Donkey, Sister Penelope, Honorable Bushistotle, Philosopher-Warrior-King of Athens, Cardinal Lei, Isolation Booth, Hail Bushistotle, Secret Archives, Fra Diavolo, Cardinal Bernie, Farah Fatwah, Athenian Armed Forces, Imperial Palace, Weapons of Mass Destruction, Culture War, Instant Message, Karen the Oracle, New York, Usare Telefonini, Vice-Presidential Cell, Athenian Way, Brother Bruno, Vatican Swiss Guard New!
Concordance | Text Stats Browse Sample Pages:
Front Cover | First Pages | Back Cover | Surprise Me!
It all started innocently enough, in a way that no one would have ever imagined: I was scrolling through spam from spammers who seemed convinced that my penis wasn't long enough despite the years I'd spent yanking at it in the darkness, when I happened upon a message from a Mrs. Irma R. Gorgonzola. Read the first page Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
amon zorobabel, green plastic grass, illegible text, yellow frogs Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
Sister Mary Subjugation, Sister Naomi, Dudley the Donkey, Sister Penelope, Honorable Bushistotle, Philosopher-Warrior-King of Athens, Cardinal Lei, Isolation Booth, Hail Bushistotle, Secret Archives, Fra Diavolo, Cardinal Bernie, Farah Fatwah, Athenian Armed Forces, Imperial Palace, Weapons of Mass Destruction, Culture War, Instant Message, Karen the Oracle, New York, Usare Telefonini, Vice-Presidential Cell, Athenian Way, Brother Bruno, Vatican Swiss Guard New!
Concordance | Text Stats Browse Sample Pages:
Front Cover | First Pages | Back Cover | Surprise Me!
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