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Lessons for the Living: Stories of Forgiveness, Gratitude, and Courage at the End of Life

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What the Dying Teach Us: Lessons on Living

Stan Goldberg has put together a series of stories that will inspire you to reach into your heart and soul and seek ways to care for others with a compassionate heart. Each story will guide you into acts of kindness that will move your heart into a place only your soul can embrace. In essence, these stories are encounters with eternal relationships created in our most simplest of moments in our care for others.

You will find stories of gratitude, forgiveness, courage, hope, faith, and much more in this book. As you care for the needs of others through service, you will find a path created inside you that will form your character in ways you never knew was possible. You will find peace in the appearance of despair, and you will come to know your most authentic self.

This is a book of encouragement. You will find yourself challenged by your present behavior toward others and replace it with the joy of living life in unconditional grace. Dying people have much to teach us about living, and how, unconditionally loving another person during their most darkest hours will reveal a beacon of light that will illuminate our soul.

Sometimes it takes losing everything for you to appreciate what you have in front of you and how your life can make a difference to so many. This is just one of the revelations discovered in Stan Goldberg's new book LESSONS FOR THE LIVING. Whether it is appreciating the taste of one's favorite dessert, really hearing music for the first time or learning how you have impacted others, Goldberg realized after being given a sobering view of his own mortality just how precious things in life can be. This is one you will read with a renewed sense of what really makes us happy in life.

I hesitated starting this book. The subject, care of the dying, seemed too depressing. I'm glad I did go ahead with it. It is a healing joy to read, and a shining tribute to the personalities of patients Stan met while volunteering at hospices and to the compassion and skill of hospice staffs and volunteers. The practical suggestions at the end are concise and usable.

Stan Goldberg is a brave man. Diagnosed with an aggressive prostate cancer, he faces the prospect of dying as a relatively young man by going directly to the people who can teach him about dying. He becomes a Hospice volunteer. Out of his experiences he learns timeless lessons in forgiveness, gratitude and courage that he shares with us in honest, well-written prose in his book Lessons for the Living. We need more books like this for we are all mortal. We need to know what to expect and to be able to talk to one another about death as a deeply personal experience affecting not only the person who dies, but all of us whether connected closely or peripherably. Well done, Stan.Talking It Over: Understanding Sexual Diversity

Stan Goldberg's book __Lessons for the Living_____ is a compassionate journey through his experiences as a hospice worker. Upon being diagnosed with prostate cancer, Dr. Goldberg took a proactive role by volunteering to work with the dying. His book is so easy to read, considering the topic, often humorous, and definitely an insightful view into caring for people in the last months of their lives. Most important, however, was his way of opening himself up to the reader's scrutiny, sharing his own fears, and his own experiences with friends and family. I heartily recommend this book to anyone who knows anyone who will eventually die.

As a person who has lived through two serious brain tumors and who is looking into avenues to volunteer to serve others in need, my husband read this book. Due to his condition, there are times when he can read, write and understand and there are times when he can not read or even follow the plot of a short cartoon. But he discusses what he reads with me and I have put together this review on his behalf, paraphrasing his own words from this point on.

I can relate to the author of this book and his motivation. My condition is indefinite as I have already outlived the life expectation of someone with my condition (oligodendroglioma). The author of this book has a more definite condition with death being much more inevitable for him. Yet I can relate. I can also relate to the author in that he found himself drawn to being of service to others and more specifically to others who are approaching death.

Death is still something that most people avoid thinking about, even if they are dying or a loved one is on their death bed. Like myself, this author decided to face death with honesty and integrity. This book is about his thoughts and experiences helping people to face death as a hospice volunteer. I read this book because I am starting to consider doing the same and I wanted to get a realistic and honest perspective on what it involves and what it is like. That is exactly what this book delivers.

Thankfully the author does not white-wash his experiences. His honesty and sincerity comes through from beginning to end. Thankfully he does no use religion as an opiate and therefore the frankness and realism is gritty. He recounts his experiences with various people he has helped face death without painting them as saints or angels. He gives us their negative human sides.

He tells us that helping people die is messy, unpredictable, very difficult to deal with emotionally, and so on. He gives us the bad with the good. In fact, he is so frank about the difficulty involved with being a hospice volunteer that I find myself grappling with the thought of volunteering. he has made it clear how difficult it is. For this I am grateful.

But it is not all negative. It seems he has gained a certain maturity, a certain attitude towards life and death that can not be gained without going through his experiences. Most of all, what shines through for me is the author's selflessness, his willingness to help the dying despite the tremendous difficulty in doing so and his uncompromising sincerity and honesty about it all.

He also gives good advice for people who's loved ones are dying and some resources for those who want to volunteer for hospices and some recommended reading for those who want to read more on the topic of death and life.

I recommend this book to anyone who has a terminal illness, to their loved ones and to anyone who is considering volunteer work in a hospice.

I found the book insightful, inspirational, and practical for me in my everyday life. My favorite chapters are:
Chapter 2. LETTING GO where he said "If you hold onto the past, grasping onto what no longer exists, you'll create havoc for yourself and others."
Chapter 4. HEART COMMUNICATION where he asked, "How is it possible that something as ordinary as breathing could have such an impact?"
Chapter 6. THE DILEMA OF HOPE where he said, "The absence of hope is not a negative state."
Chapter 8. FORGIVING where he enticed me with, "When I felt people weren't meeting my expectations--when I knew they could do something differrent--I became indignant, refusing to accept behaviors different from what I would have done. I couldn' forgive them. ...Ned led me to understand my folly."
PRACTICAL SUGGESTIONS...23 "things that are helpful for the dying and those who care for them."

I don't have a terminal disease nor does anyone close to me. However, I found a lot of value in this book through its touching accounts of hospice patients with simple last wishes. The book approaches topics such as compassion, forgiveness, appreciation, and letting go in a way that leaves you refreshed and humbled without being condescending.

The book doesn't give off the tone that its aim is to teach readers to be compassionate, forgiving, essentially more loving; but somehow that's how I end up feeling after reading this book. It is one I will go to again and again when I need a reminder of how to be a better friend, family member, and lover. I found it easier to relate to than the Dalai Lama books such as An Open Heart. I recommend this book to everyone and have even gifted to a few friends.

Lessons For The Living - Stories of Forgiveness, Gratitude, and Courage at the End of Life By Stan Goldberg is an inspirational book based on a true story. When Stan Goldberg was diagnosed with cancer he was faced with the grim possibility that his physical life was ending. He signed up as a volunteer for hospice to help those who were in the process of dying. He chose to face his fear of death by choosing to live, by reaching out to connect and to help others in need. In giving Stan learned valuable lessons that he shared in this precious book. The stories are real and heart warming and a reminder of the value in giving to others. If you want to learn about death and dying, life and living this is a beautiful book that will encourage and inspire you to never take any thing for granted and to enjoy every single precious moment. To learn more about Lessons For The Living and Stan Goldberg visit his website Stan Goldberg Writer. Also listen to the onlinewithandrea interview with Stan Goldberg.

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To some degree we may each judge a book by the cover and title--In this case I assumed that this title would be thought provoking, heart-breaking and one that would likely leave me feeling solemn. I owe an apology to Stan because I could have never known how masterfully he would take a difficult subject and relay it with such gold-spun words. He manages to share the precious, pivotal and profound last months and in some cases last moments of those he cared for as a hospice volunteer, in a way that uplifts and teaches.

It becomes so obvious that compassion rules this man's heart--and he shares in such a way that the reader becomes steeped in that same tea. As a result I am sure that all who read this book will be better able to handle the final months, weeks and days of a loved one... or themselves... with grace, compassion and profound respect and authenticity.

I lovely title for anyone who will inhale and exhale today.

Rena M. Reese
Founder, Soul Salon International