Lessons In Love: The Transformation of Spirit Through Intimacy [Paperback]

Corneau Guy (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: February 15, 2000

In the tradition of Thomas Moore, Jungian analyst and lecturer Guy Corneau delivers a hopeful message that will help us move beyond the gender wars to a new era of personal fulfillment. With engaging anecdotes and mythical references, he instructs us to look into ourselves and create our own guiding principles. He then suggests how we can achieve our aspirations through meaningful relationships with those who challenge us to test and fulfill them.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Can we ever experience true intimacy in our adult personal lives? Canadian psychoanalyst Corneau (Absent Fathers, Lost Sons), a Jungian analyst, says we cannot. That is, not until we repair the ravages of society's patriarchy, which has affected our familial experiences?those interactions between mother and son, father and daughter. Corneau's straightforward approach aims not to "make the journey easier" but rather to "unlock the meaning of the problems"; doing so offers opportunities for growth and "profound self-knowledge." Using fairy tales and myths to illustrate psychological conflicts and their possible resolutions, Corneau explicates the "paternal complexes" of women and "maternal complexes" of men that live as ghosts between them, resulting in "the woman who loves too much" and "the man who is afraid to love." According to Corneau, underlying the problems are basic human issues of balancing "fusion and separation"?which, loosely translated, means that one has to love oneself before being able to love another. In order to achieve this state, one must face and resolve the problems that prevent intimacy, first in parent-child, then in adult, relationships. Corneau unties knotty psychological concepts; claiming not to have all the answers, he offers "musings" on intimacy. He draws not only from laboratory findings and clients in therapy but also from his personal experiences, providing an unusually thoughtful treatise on a popular yet elusive topic.
Copyright 1998 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Library Journal

Corneau is a therapist and lecturer whose Jungian bias comes across loud and clear. He talks about how an absent father wounds a woman's animus (her subconcious male energy), affecting her relationships with men, and how a mother, absent or present, can shred a man's anima (his subconscious female energy) and thereby ruin his life forever. Corneau claims that the problems stemming from one's original father-daughter or mother-son relationship are what keep one from intimacy throughout life. Unfortunately, he doesn't provide any concrete ideas on how one can conquer what he considers to be an innate Oedipus or Elektra complex. Recommended for libraries where Jung and Freud are still in vogue; everyone else can skip this one.?Pamela A. Matthews, Gettysburg Coll. Lib., PA
Copyright 1998 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 336 pages
• Publisher: Holt Paperbacks; 1st edition (February 15, 2000)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0805063978
• ISBN-13: 978-0805063974
• Product Dimensions: 7.9 x 5.1 x 0.9 inches
• Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (3 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,581,249 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

11 of 11 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A reference for your love life, June 25, 1999

By A Customer

This review is from: Lessons in Love: The Transformation of Spirit Through Intimacy (Hardcover)

Guy Corneau opens a new way in the understanding of love realtionships. He assumes that our relationships with our parents command our love relationships. Sceptical? Read him and you will be convinced. Understand why you always get to the same kind of partner that does not suit you. Understand how you can get to a better understanding of your beloved to build a intimate love relationship. This book is not a recipe to seduce whoever you want or to influence your partner in the way you intend. This book is the start for a better understanding of yourself to know where you can find your happiness. Read and read this book again and you will here find an appropriate guide to achievement.

6 of 6 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Pushing Through the Fear of Intimacy, May 19, 2000

By 

Jennifer E. Sertl (Pittsford, NY USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Lessons In Love: The Transformation of Spirit Through Intimacy (Paperback)

I read this book over a year ago and was surprised that there were not more customer reviews. But after reflection, I understand why. It is not that customers do not have anything to say about this book. It is that the book effects people very personally. I want you to read this book and discover your own transformation! I can tell you that the greatest gift this book offers are really effective questions that allow you to uncover layers of "static" that lay behind your own interactions with others and especially with those you love most. The "static" for me was fear and anger. I will share with you my personal testimony. My husband and I had a "crisis" and were separated. While he was reading John Gray's "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" I was reading "Lessons in Love." As I was learning about my own motivations, I realized that I had some childhood wounds that had found there way into our marriage. Rather than treating my husband as my "partner" my "equal"--I was treating him as though he was responsible for some earlier "injustice." The questions and issues raised in this book allowed me to focus on "what is the real issue here" and "how can I get these needs met" in a healthy way. My awareness didn't happen overnight and I had a lot of other support. As I have been talking to more and more people about my near fatal accident (divorce) I am learning that myself and others are terrified to be happy and accept love. This book can help you get closer to that acceptance.

Enjoy the journey.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Important Reflections on Man/Woman Intimacy Problems, October 4, 2005

By 

Student of Life "Student of Life" (San Diego, CA United States) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Lessons in Love: The Transformation of Spirit Through Intimacy (Hardcover)

Having just read this book (in French) I find it important to confirm what other reviewers have said: This is an important book that helps us realize the wounds we carry around with us in our relationships, and that prevent us from living initmately both with ourselves and others. As the 'Journal' review states, it doesn't give us the solutions: the magic pill that solves everything; BUT it says it like it is, take on our own responsability! Work on ourselves! And how can we work on ourselves without having an idea what the problem may be? : This book answers that fundamentaly. To continue on the 'Journal' reveiw, yes, it is based on the Jungian optique, but it goes right to the timeless problems between man and woman and human nature. It talks about how our environment (parents/society) nourtures or mal-nourtures us. It talks about how this crisis existed well before our time and how it continues to this day. So I find it goes well beyond the scope of a Jungian or Freudian library. Also personally it explains well what I have seen in my relationships with women, and the power strugles and is very apropos to the relationship attitudes of those around me. In any event, it helped open my eyes to what to avoid in my choice of a partner. After all, I want to find harmony and intimacy and share responsability, not conflict.