Customer Reviews

Letters to a Young Therapist: Stories of Hope and Healing

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Like JB Pontalis's WINDOWS (with which this book makes an interesting comparison in cultural styles), LETTERS TO A YOUNG THERAPIST is an engaging and lucid look at one clinical psychologist's beliefs, both idiosyncratic and professional. More mature than self-help, less obscure than psychological theory, this one-day-read is ennobling and charming. Pipher writes with dignity about her profession's limitations and how an awareness of those limitations opens up vital possibilities. The format -- brief letters to a therapst-in-training, focused on a specific theme -- is lovely, and the insights, while not revelatory, are deftly articulated. In fact, that the book's insights are not revelatory is in a way its overall theme, and its pleasure. This is a humble, humane, and helpful book.

As a grad student in a counseling program, I picked up this book after hearing a portion of Ms. Pipher's interview with Diane Reams on NPR. I read this book in two evenings. It has a lot of good advice, not just for therapists, but also for clients. She has a very soft, nurturing way of writing which I found delightful. I would highly recommend this book.

In her magical new book, "Letters to a Young Therapist," Mary Pipher uses enchanting and lyrical prose to express her feelings not only about therapy, but also about such topics as nature, marriage, ethics, and happiness. This book is a compilation of letters that Pipher wrote to a graduate student in psychology. Pipher's letters are filled with gentle humor and a profound understanding of human nature.

Since Pipher began her career as a therapist in 1972, she has learned a great deal about her clients and herself, and this book is the fruit of all that she has learned. She emphasizes that therapy is more of an art than a science, and that therapists bear an enormous responsibility to treat their clients with great care.

Pipher's ideas are a breath of fresh air in a society that is quick to bash easy targets. For instance, it is fashionable for people to blame their parents and other family members for their problems, but Pipher believes that individuals must ultimately take responsibility for their own choices in life. She also believes that the family unit is so important that we should do everything in our power to support and strengthen it rather than undermine it.

Pipher waxes poetic when she speaks of the power of metaphor and storytelling to enhance people's lives and imbue their experiences with greater meaning. Pipher is not only a gifted therapist. She is also a talented writer who understands the power of language to change lives. I recommend this book highly for its warmth, wisdom, compassion, and insight into what makes life worth living.

This little treasure is loaded with wisdom and insights one might expect to find in a much larger tome. Dr. Pipher shares her personal and clinical stories in a gentle friendly way that makes you nod your head, and say "aha".

What makes this book so remarkable is that, whether one is a therapist or not, the words spill over and warm you like a down comforter.

Pour yourself some hot cocoa, take a deep breath, and read this one slowly. You'll be glad you did.

-Terry Matlen, ACSW

As a Social Worker in private psychotherapy practice, I find that sometimes the work can be isolating and at times I question whether I should make more of an effort to consider the latest trends in psychotherapy. Mary Pipher affirms that the classic skills that make a good therapist such as compassion, empathy, listening skills, reframing and the ability to induce a sense of calm are timeless. Furthermore, even if I wasn't a therapist I think I would still devour this book because her writing is a pleasure to read. I highly recommend it for anyone just starting their career in therapy or those who have been in the field for decades. This book is bound to become a classic!

I will frequently recommend this book to colleagues, students, clients and friends. Much like Dr. Yalom's books this is an easy but powerful read. Dr. Pipher understands therapy at a meaningful and complete level. She even manages to present cognitive therapy in a humanistic and sensitive context! Her frequent metaphors tend to be right on the money and her observations on issues through the generations were also very enlightening. Summarily, you get the sense that there is a very authentic and experienced person writing this book and you get a rare opportunity to experience the potential of psychotherapy.

Mary Pipher is an understanding therapist. The author realizes
that families solve many problems on their own. The role of a
good therapist is to realize that he/she cannot eliminate all
ills in the world. In addition, people have limits. The author
shows examples of how a healthy person can grow and learn from
an experience. People enjoy the process of working toward goals.
The attainment of the goal is not always the most joyful
event. Instead, it is the extensive process of socialization
involved in reaching the new plateau. The author also explains
that too much endurance of others permits them to be slackers.
Endurance is a balancing trait which has limits. The author
illustrates how fortunate children benefit by having
parents able to assist in sorting through the avalanche of
life's choices. She cautions writers to show up faithfully,
be diligent, pay attention, tell the truth and avoid becoming
too attached to the results. A good writer must learn to be
dispassionate. Compassion should be coupled with clearheadedness.
Lastly, the author described the importance of reflection
with a reference to Charles Dickens. For every hour he wrote,
Dickens would walk an hour to reflect. This book makes for
good general reading. The author provides passages extolling the
beauty of nature, the need for pets to complement a household
and many more tidbits too numerous to enumerate here.
Finally, she provides some thoughts on marriage which is defined
as the triumph of faith over experience. The book would make a
good addition to a personal library.

I first read this book when I was a graduate student in 2005. After practicing in a wide variety of settings as a Child and Family Therapist over the past 6+ years, I can say that Mary Pipher's words are relevant in all therapeutic settings (and maybe even more so in settings that traditionally lack warmth and empathy). She reminds the young therapist about searching for meaning and the importance of self care. I also admire her ability to convey vulnerability and her absolute human-ness, while at the same time remaining trustworthy and regarded as an expert. This book is lovely and I would encourage therapists and non-therapists alike to read it.

Mary Pipher is truly a master at her craft. Her practical approach to teaching and life demystifies the clinical process utilizing a no nonsense and unconditional positive regard for both the student and client. This should be required reading in every foundation class.

Kudos to a job well done!

Easy read at a great price. I needed the book for school listed as optional an I ended up reading it on my personal time.