690 of 725 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Life Altering Perspectives
I have always been a fan of Dr Phil's. When I heard him discussing this book I had to have it. When i began to read it I could not put it down, it is full of wisdom and toughen up tips. I have alway been a softer sided personality but recently began to realize that in the world we live in today you have to become tougher in order to succeed. Dr Phil has put a wealth of...
Published 22 months ago by Mommaw
282 of 347 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars Some good pearls but overall lacking...
I thought this book had some interesting lessons. I can be too trusting at times. I have been screwed over and naive at times. But I have learned and grown and become stronger from these lessons. I have become more confident after these experiences and then chose better people in my life the next time. I'm not sure that adopting this attitude will bring me happiness and...
Published 22 months ago by Sweebk
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690 of 725 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Life Altering Perspectives,
I have always been a fan of Dr Phil's. When I heard him discussing this book I had to have it. When i began to read it I could not put it down, it is full of wisdom and toughen up tips. I have alway been a softer sided personality but recently began to realize that in the world we live in today you have to become tougher in order to succeed. Dr Phil has put a wealth of knowledge into this book and I highly recommend it to everyone who is trying to understand the changes that have taken place in our world over the past few decades. People are not the same, they have become aggressive, self-seeking, self-absorbed and at times rude, crude and malicious. Back in the old days people were softer, more christian-like, caring, compassionate, giving and self-sacrificing. The world is totally different now and I agree with much of what Dr Phil says however I refuse to become like those who are tough and selfish in their ways. I do have a better understanding of how they operate and why they do what they do I am on to their game plans now because of Dr Phil's wisdom and I realize he is a tough Virgo who is set in Virgoan ways and not as soft as other signs of the zodiac so I take his advice and apply it to myself gleaning the nuggets of wisdom within and absorbing them. I do not live a clone of Dr Phil, I do utilize his wisdom though. As most of you know, I write my reviews based on the actual book and its content, I share the words written within so you can have a greater view of what is not shared on the previews. The following information is directly from the book, enjoy!
He says Success is created and I believe it is .
Cheaters do sometimes win, the early bird doesn't always get the worm, and doing unto others as you wish they would do unto you doesn't always get you what you want, need or deserve. I'm telling you it's not the world I live in and I'm telling you it's not the world you live in. They play to win.
This statement woke me up he is so right on, I have always been taught this valuable lessons from the christian point of view...
First, I want to show you how you can protect yourself from getting hurt by the damaged and dangerous people lurking around the corner. Hurt by people who live on the dark side, dispense pain as a matter of course, and never shed a tear or give a second thought to how they victimized you- and may even brag about it.
Page 18 and 19 are excellent and I cannot share it all,
but he tells about how The baiters believe the "means are justified by the end." "They are totally self-focused and results oriented, and they are willing to do anything , absolutely anything , to achieve their goal, they lack empathy, conscience, and use dirty tricks to achieve their goals. they exploit abuse, lie, cheat, and manipulate."
He talks quite a bit about Baiters and how they often do get caught, he shares how to recognize them and deal with them.
Page 52 and 53
They thrive on drama and crisis.
They are often very angry and arrogant, which shows just below the surface. BAITERS are braggarts, and if you pay attention, they will show you who they are.
To predict their behavior, you have to see the world through their eyes and let your mind take a walk on the dark side.
This reminds me of a song and is a thought I will often refer back to.
Page 81, 82 and 83
They are never wrong, never responsible, never accountable, and never willing to step up and own their part in a negative situation. Someone must be to blame, and since it is never them, that leaves you.
They lie , either by misstatement or by omission. When a BAITER lies, however, it is all too often for a very nefarious purpose and designed to mislead someone who , if they knew the truth, would likely behave differently.
BAITERS hide everything with a menagerie of lies that would boggle the rational mind. They live their lives as a masquerade!
A lie unchallenged becomes the truth in time.
Never, ever put sensitive content, content that can be taken out of context, in writing, especially in an email. Instead, pick up the phone or go in person and have a real conversation.
Wow, this was a real eye opened for me! I have often thought when you write something down it can not be misconstrued because it is a clearly written sequence of thoughts, feelings and ideas. However, upon reflection of his thought here, I know he is correct for I have seen this happen personally. People do not always interpret things as you intend them to, miscommunication, misinformation.
Define what you really want, and do not invest in people or situations that couldn't give it to you even if they wanted to.
You never want to be predictable. And to be interesting, you have to maintain a certain degree of mystery, because it gives you a degree of mastery. Be discreet.
Be in PI mode always.
You should strive to surround yourself with a nucleus of people who share your passion, share your vision, and support your pursuit of your goals. It is important to understand that people do NOT bond head to head; they bond heart to heart.
I will leave you with that valuable thought! People who bond with you heart to heart not head to head are those who you want to involve yourself in and be around. They are the ones who want your best, who promote you and desire to see you succeed. They are the ones worthy of investing yourself in and becoming a strong invincible team. I have been challenged, changed and encouraged by the wisdom written in Life Code and will definitely be incorporating much of what I have learned into my everyday actions and interactions with others. Thank you Dr Phil for seeing the need for this information to get out and reach into our hearts and homes to make us better equipped for life as we know it today! Life Code is a valuable tool and instrument for daily success.
238 of 257 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Not like any book I ever read!,
This book is truly an eye opener. As I read it I can see so many interpersonal mistakes I've made in trusting the wrong people when all the signs were right in front of me. When he says we shouldn't give people the benefit of the doubt it makes a world of sense in the times were are living in. It's a totally different ball game and we have to be aware of the signs to look for to keep ourselves safe financially, socially and emotionally. And how to use the rules not only to defend ourselves, but take the winning stand of situations.
And true to Dr. Phil style...he says it like it is ....irreverent and politically incorrect! I LOVED IT!
142 of 161 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Very well thought out cd audio presentation - Top notch !,
This review is from: Dr. Phil McGraw: Life Code (Audible Audio Edition)
The cd version of this audio book is one of the best audio books I have ever listened to. Besides Dr. Phil's excellent presentation of the material, really good examples he gives in each section, the cd audio book is put together unlike any other audio book I have listen to. If you want to get to a specific track of the cd audio book fast, Dr. Phil mentions what topic he is going to talk about at the beginning of the each track and sticks to that subject in that track. I can rapidly move through the tracks and know exactly what will be spoken about - which lessen's the amount of time when you are trying to find a particular subject in the cd audio book. Excellent, well done Dr. Phil !!
282 of 347 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars Some good pearls but overall lacking...,
I thought this book had some interesting lessons. I can be too trusting at times. I have been screwed over and naive at times. But I have learned and grown and become stronger from these lessons. I have become more confident after these experiences and then chose better people in my life the next time. I'm not sure that adopting this attitude will bring me happiness and peace - my ultimate goal. I think the best way to prevent getting taken is to value yourself more and become more confident. Having a pessimistic attitude like this doesn't contribute to a good character. And it IS good character that protects and elevates you in the long run. I don't like the idea of expecting the worst of everyone and being paranoid. I don't think it is the answer. Also, it seems like a lot of unrelated things were thrown into this book. It was all over the place. I don't want to live in fear. I want to attract people to me with good character. If I go around being negative and looking for the worst in everyone, that is what I will attract. I don't know if the cynicism is necessary. So what I take away is that the world is corrupt now so you have to be a little corrupt too in order to "win". Some of the things said in this book just rubbed me the wrong way. For example: You should mention to a lady that is possibly trying to steal your husband that he doesn't like large thighs in order to shake her confidence. That way she will back off and think twice about stealing your husband? Really? So much in this book just doesn't feel right to me. There are some truths, but overall, I don't like it. I actually wish I had not read it.
I just read this quote and think this sums up why I do not like the book: "We have learned that the key to happiness is inner peace. The greatest obstacles to inner peace are disturbing emotions such as anger, attachment, fear & suspicion, while love & compassion & a sense of universal responsibility are the sources of peace & happiness" - Dalai Lama The book, "Life Code" preaches just the opposite.
11 of 11 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Oh, oh...another negative review...,
I don't like this book. I am only a little over 25% into it and I'm already thinking to myself 'Get on with it already, Dr. Phil!'
The first two chapters could have been ditched altogether and replaced with what I am reading now. Also, the fillers written in bold that reiterate what he has just written are just that, fillers. I highly respect Dr. McGraw and I think he does an absolutely wonderful job trying to help people be real with themselves. This is more than commendable, but maybe this book won't reflect that as much.
A lot of other people who have negatively reviewed 'Life Code' have mostly said not to waste your money on it. I agree with them. I am having a lot of trouble getting past his writing style and into what he is trying to say (I should mention that I have not read his other books and I don't often watch his show, either). I think it should have been more tightly edited so that the meaning would not be lost. It's lost on me because I'm pretty bored with it right now, although I will try to finish it to the end.
What I did get out of it was people should be on guard for takers in their life, even if they are family. I think, for the most part, people do that already - get their radar up and running, so to speak. Once bitten, twice shy. At least that is the motto I try to live by.
At any rate, don't waste your money on this book until it passes more editing. It is not a very good read and it is really, really, really, drawn out.
23 of 26 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars repetative,
very hard to read after first chapter. same thing repeated over and over. It was full of just basic office and work place politics.
60 of 75 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Seriously brilliant book,
This book resonates with something I had been noticing on my own. The more I strive to be considerate and kind toward people I care about (or anyone for that matter) - the more misery I seem to get in return. I am NOT weak or a doormat, but sadly people inevitably find that out the hard way. In the end, it feels like we both lose. Has the world gone mad? What's going on here??
Dr. Phil and his son Jay have also apparently noticed that today's world is different than it used to be. Many people will interpret an 'evolved' Christian way of being as weakness, not strength. And seeing you as 'weak' they will try to take advantage of you in some way or another.
What makes this book unique is that Dr. Phil dares to get you to recognize that this isn't just the occasional 'bad person' that we all run into in life. People all around you - even close to you - are probably gaming your relationship in ways you didn't want to see or believe. We were all taught to give people 'the benefit of the doubt.' We overlook and forgive things in our friends, family members, coworkers, acquaintances and strangers. Unfortunately, we often trust others WAY too much. And we leave ourselves vulnerable in so many ways. We all do it.
This book really opens your eyes to the *reality* of human nature - not the way 'it should be.' It gives many well thought out 'pointers' that will change the way you look at everyone in your life. It will also change the way that you present yourself to others, and the way that you approach life. He artfully persuades those of us who strive to be 'good' to change some of our ways of thinking.
This is truly a very unique, gutsy, insightful, persuasive and brilliant book.
19 of 22 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars I've been teaching English for 30+ years, and I'd grade this disaster an "F" and recommend a remedial English class.,
This is the worst New York Times "Best Seller" since Jonathon Living Seagull, both of which are the equivalent of the Pet Rock, all squarely aimed at the mindless masses of Americans whose intelligence can never be underestimated.
The entire book can be summarized in this simplistic sentence: "Trust your instincts when you deal with people."
This bit of trite advice is tediously milked out over 241-pages.
Piles of thick, numbing fat, common knowledge, contradictory and inane advice, pathetic and "country" style wit, long out-of-date, are the mainstay of this book, which is an enormous waste of time, paper, and money. It is unbelievable that any such drivel would ever be put into print, except by the son of the writer.
Perhaps the choicest bit of Dr. Phil's wisdom is this gem on page 39:
"But in the real world, where you and I actually live, it simply allowed that wolf in sheep's clothing to pull the wool right over my eyes."
Dr. Phil is most fond of "Getting Real," and this book, in its hardback edition, is real good as a coaster and not much else.
29 of 35 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Life Code - I think not!!!,
After seeing Dr. Phil on Oprah's Lifeclass and having read his first book, I looked forward to reading this too. It's paranoid ramblings about psychopaths and people of that nature. I can live with that if there's something to be learned. HOWEVER, THIS IS FIND REPUGNANT. He mentions one of his "best friends" who is very wealthy and would fly his private plane anywhere to help him. However, the guy's also a serial philanderer. With that in mind HE WOULDN'T LET THE SAME BEST FRIEND FLY TO GET HIS WIFE OR DAUGHTER!!! If we are known by the company we keep, Dr. Phil seems to be the person he's warning us about. He'd use his best friend, who has no moral compass, for his own good but not trust him alone with his wife or daughter. No one's perfect, but Dr. Phil appears to be the "user" he warns us about as he mentions this man and a few other friends of his. Give your money to a charity instead. Dr Phil, if you're reading this, I'd like my money back as well. Kathy Bell
22 of 26 people found the following review helpful
3.0 out of 5 stars Jury's Still Out,
It's probably unfair of me to review this book when I haven't completed it. However, although I have tremendous respect for "Dr. Phil", there is something about his approach that is off-putting and frankly seems like a used car salesman (sorry to insult any used car sales people who may read this) but I believe even you would understand what I mean. The first chapter discusses over and over how great and necessary this book is and I found myself wondering if I would ever get beyond the self promotion to the heart of the book itself. After a long and boring Chapter 1 he begins to do so but by this point I found myself losing interest. At the moment it's sitting on my bookshelf waiting for me to revisit.
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Life Code: The New Rules for Winning in the Real World by Phillip C. McGraw (Audio CD - February 12, 2013)