Customer Reviews

Life on Santa Claus Lane

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Yes, Virginia, there really is a Santa Claus Lane. And for Darrell Bain, life at home is filled with more funny and unusual experiences than a stocking is filled with goodies on Christmas morning.

Life on Santa Claus Lane is a collection of amusing stories detailing Bain's life on a Christmas tree farm in East Texas along with his spouse, dog, and two cats. You certainly won't be disappointed with Bain's down-home, tongue-in-cheek style and quirky perceptions of life. (Per evidence of his definition of the actual use of a tape measure: "There is no actual use for this tool because it mysteriously disappears whenever anything needs measuring.") But don't look for any talk about sex, because that topic is emphatically off limits. Just ask Darrell's wife. The exploits of their dog, Biscuit, however, is fair game.

Through it all Bain spins a sequence of tales that provide smirks of familiarity, chuckles of amusement, or downright, out-loud laughter. Wait till you read about "The Great Closet Expedition" or learn of his ironclad memory in "A Simple Errand." Even putting up a garden tent can be quite an adventure where Bain is concerned.

Whatever happens on Santa Claus Lane, you can be sure Darrel Bain will tell us about it in a fun and entertaining fashion. This book is a great read, and I highly recommend it!

Reviewer: Gene Berger

This just has to be the funniest book I have ever read. I was doing a job for the publisher Bookmice, improving the appearance and usability of the HTML versions of several books: background, headings, internal links and so on.This kind of work doesn't involve much reading from the book, but when I started on 'Santa Claus Lane', my eyes were caught by a sentence, and I got to reading, then I went to the start of the chapter to make sense of it. Before long, I gave away all pretense of working on the book, and simply read it from end to end. Even then, the content wouldn't let me alone. Many of the stories were well worth a second read, and now weeks later, they still make me chuckle. Darrel has a wicked turn of phrase: * "I was watching a football game through closed eyelids (this is something only men can do)." * "...anyone who has been owned by kittens..." * "What's that noise?" she asked. "The wall," I said. "Walls don't make noise." "They do when I bump them with my head." He describes perfectly ordinary domestic episodes in a way that'll have you laugh. I suspect this book is not for youngsters, but the more mature among us will identify with this self-effacing rogue and his ever-victorious wife Betty.

I will never look at a Christmas tree the same again. What a funny, funny recounting of life in the not so fast lane of a Christmas tree farmer and his long suffering wife Betty.

If you've had a hard day at the office and want to relax while reading about the hilarious trials and tribulations of someone else, this book is the one. This is better than cherry vanilla ice cream.