Customer Reviews

Life Is a Verb: 37 Days to Wake Up, Be Mindful, and Live Intentionally

5 star:		(69)
4 star:		(4)
3 star:		(4)
2 star:		(4)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

In the beginning, this book really annoyed me.

Here's the set-up: "In October of 2003, my stepfather was diagnosed with lung cancer. He died 37 days later."

Tragic. Though I can't imagine, I can empathize. But then comes the goopy stuff:

"The time frame of 37 days made an impression on me. We often live as if we have all the time in the world, but the definite-ness of 37 days was striking. So short a time, as if all the regrets and joys of a life would barely have time to register before time was up...."

"I tried to reconcile the fact that this fearful death was happening with the understanding that I needed to make something good out of it. What emerged was a commitment to ask myself this question every morning: What would I be doing today if I only had 37 days to live?"

Well, you know the answer. Savor every second. "Enjoy every sandwich," as the dying Warren Zevon put it. Buddhism 101. The punch line of a million self-help books.

So was I moved by Ms. Digh's approach to her theoretical last 37 days --- pumping out reams of writing so her young daughters would have some idea who Mom was? No. And not because I'm hard-hearted. It's just that I've heard all this. Many times, most recently in "Improv Wisdom", which I consider the last word on Showing Up and Being Here.

But I stumbled on, past the beautifully designed pages with the lovely art and the super-sincere poems by poets I'd never heard of, until I achieved the entrance to Part One. "Inhabit Your Story." The predictable moral arrived on schedule: "Find the change you can make and make it."

On to Part Two: "The Six Practices for Intentional Living." Which includes: "Dance in your car", followed by "carry a small grape" and "always rent the red convertible" and "say wow when you see as bus".

What was I doing in this Birkenstock gulag, surrounded by Good Thoughts?

But then I hit the story of Ms. Digh sitting on a plane next to a boor, and how they became close friends. The next page brought another compelling story. The Jungian analyst Marion Woodman, sick in India, is bothered by a large brown woman who crowds her on the couch of the hotel lobby. For days. On the fourth day, the woman's husband shows up to say he had been sending his wife there to pour her warmth and life energy into the body of the dying Woodman. The woman had, Woodman decided, saved her life. And then came the story of Digh's college lover, back in 1978. Richard was African-American. Her parents were less than thrilled. The relationship withered. Flash-cut to now. Richard is now Amanda. He wears his old girlfriend's earrings.

Tell me enough stories, and one will be an arrow to the heart. Richard-and-Patti was, and then, suddenly, they all were --- and advice like "Go to a black barbershop to get your hair cut if you're a Caucasian" no longer seemed monumentally trite. Reading on, I learned about hikaru dorodango --- shiny Japanese mud balls --- and how to make better ones simply by making more. I learned how to disagree by saying, elegantly, "I don't see the truth in that." I was reminded what a dollar can mean to the person ahead of you in the supermarket line. I encountered some very wise quotations, like this, from Eric Hoffer: "You can discover what your enemy fears by observing the means he uses to frighten you."

In short, as I read on, I found myself getting sharper and smarter. I considered why it might be better to make a mistake --- and learn from it --- than strain to get everything right. And I read the obituary Patti Digh wrote recently for her father --- who died in 1980, when she was in her teens --- and misted over.

The stories in the news these days are so big. Tectonic plates are moving. History is being made. But then, it always is. "Life is a Verb" is a reminder that our lives are bigger than the stories in the headlines. A small thought? Not to me. Now I have to go back to the beginning and start again....

Inspired by the death of her step-father (and informed by the death of her father), Patti Digh's book offers advice, nudges, and insistence toward joy and responsibility (not quite the word I want), in equal measure.

With essays like "Dance in Your Car," "Follow Your Desire Lines," and "Always Rent the Red Convertible," Digh urges us to loosen up, take chances, take hold of this "one wild and precious life" (as she quotes Mary Oliver).

But she assumes a life of joy will be a life touched and shaped by other people, and she includes their care in her instruction manual. "Save Face for Someone Else," and "Wear Pink Glasses" offer models of graceful ways of being with, seeing, and upholding other people. "Love Unloveable People" gently offers each of us a daunting challenge: to respond to what is good in everyone.

Digh doesn't overlook the challenges of relationship, including our relationship to self. From "Choose Your Seatmates Wisely," to "Burn those Jeans," "Don't Sell Your Red Shoes" and "Say Wow When You See a Bus," she offers fresh perspectives on familiar situations and straight-jackets of "propriety," inviting each of us to find a way to be a little more authentic.

The essays alone would be engaging and provocative, as Digh has proven in her blog, 37days. In the book a precious few are arranged to illustrate her six-point guide to a life marked by Intensity, Inclusion, Integrity, Intimacy, Intuition, and Intention. Each is followed by a short exercise to help the reader respond to and integrate the example, and a longer "movement" exercise that readers are invited to take up for 37 days: be alone for 30 minutes every day, write ten letters (in longhand) over the course of 37 days, ask yourself at lunch (for 37 days) "Am I becoming someone I respect?"

Digh suggests we take on that last question at lunch, so that we have the afternoon to save ourselves, if we are failing. It is just this kind of gentle wisdom, this confidence in all of us, that leads me to embrace this book.

It makes you think about how to live your life better - not necessarily more organized or efficient or more anything, unless the "more" is some part of your own personal "better". The writing exercises are excellent, bite-sized, and spur you to much deeper consideration of the topics. And the writing itself is funny, real, down-to-earth and extremely moving. I've bought one copy and will buy several more as gifts.

First, the review for the book: it really is a great read, thought-provoking, funny. I would recommend it to anyone. Second, the review for the kindle edition only: there were more mistakes than I would like to see. There were typos in many of the quotations used in the book, and in one "movement" section there seemed to be a portion missing. It started in the middle of a sentence, and I have no idea what should have been there. Having paid for the ebook, I expected better quality control. But love Patti Digh!

I bought "Life is a Verb: 37 Days to Wake Up, Be Mindful, and Live Intentionally" about three days in to 2010. I (like many) stumbled in to the new year still overwhelmed by the last. It took me a few days to realize- something has to shift. Who doesn't look for positive books or movies, or skim the self help aisle at Barnes and Noble when grasping for something, anything to help them shift their lives? Truth be told- I was looking on Amazon for "The Happiness Project" when I was pointed in the direction of Patti Digh's book. I am halfway through it and I've cried, laughed, written pages and pages of self awareness I've been overlooking, and danced in my car with oomph. I realize there is more to life than the hiccups I have endured over the last year....with Haiti enduring such a tragic earthquake this week, or the economy still teetering and so on. But the tragedies in our world actually coincide with lessons, ideas, and thought processes encompassed in Digh's book. What I've learned so far- life happens whether we want it to or not, but it's how we react and create the future that makes the difference. Yes, people may say many of the ideas in the book have been heard before- but I guarentee you they haven't been told with such ingenuity and intention as Digh tells them. The writing excersices alone have made me think more about my life, others around me, and complete strangers than I have probably my entire 31 years of living. You get from this book what you put in to it. You keep an open mind, you give yourself the ability to learn from new ideas about the way you live- and you will enjoy this book as much as I have. I've learned not everyone has a charmed life, but they are still people that deserve kindness and hope. What better way to pull myself out of a year long emotional rut than writing,thinking and learning about the world around me...the different people...and all the joy I never bother to see? I would give it more stars on my review if I could.

Loved this carefree book and asked my reading group to work through it together. Digh reminds us not only to revel in the moments of our day, but to create them through thoughtful attention and practice of intentionality in the things we do.
Easier said than done, so the 37 days she addresses will take some of us months.
I think I'm on day 20 months later, but they're lovely days.

Patti Digh has done a marvelous job translating her 37days blog (already a brilliant work-in-the-making, as she posts regularly) into hard copy with all the benefits a printed book can provide. To her publisher's credit, they went all out to make this book beautiful, and it is, and it matches the complexity and simplicity, at turns, her words offer.

There will be lots of reviewers who comment on Patti's amazing talent for getting to the heart of the matter, and thus, to our hearts. What I find just as fascinating about Patti is her sense of humor, one which operates at all levels.

Her ability to offer her joy in addition to her passion for her subject matter is what has hooked me since I first discovered her blog.

Life is a Verb is an in-the-moment perfect snapshot of three years of Patti's wisdom, pain, insight, and sighing admission of shortfalls.

Buy this book. I promise you will be thanking Patti that you did!

I recently had the pleasure of hearing Patti Digh, author of LIFE IS
A VERB, speak about her book . . . she
told how she came up with the idea for it when her stepfather
died just 37 days after being diagnosed with cancer . . . it
got her thinking:

* If I had thirty-seven days left, would I spend my time cleaning the attic,
purging computer files, or attending committee meetings? Would I have
passed on my stories to my children and friends, or would I spend those
days regretting not having time to do so? Am I living fully now, or am I
waiting until after the kids leave for college or my annuity matures or the
Colts move back to Baltimore? It will be too late then.

So she eventually started blogging, coming up with funny and
often moving life stories that illustrate the six core practices
that you need to follow to live without regrets--regardless of how
many days you have left:

* Say yes. How can you live a "yes, and" rather than a "yes, but"
kind of life?

Be generous. How can you give (and receive) something more
valuable than money or things?

Speak up. How can you stand tall, yet give up your attachment
to being right?

Love more. How could adoration (of yourself and others) revolutionize
your life?

Trust yourself. How can you choose who you spend your time with?

Slow down. How can you pay attention and stand still in a world moving
at warp speed?

Day shows you how to accomplish each of these by a series
of interesting action steps at the end of each chapter . . . with
respect to joy:

* Put on some music and dance like a five-year-old for two minutes.

Then get out your journal and write for three minutes (without pause,
without raising your pen from the page or checking for spelling or grammar
and all those other things that inhibit the flow of ideas) in response to the
following question: What brings me joy?

After three minutes, read what you have written.

Now for three minutes, write a brief description of the dance that would
best demonstrate that joy. Be as detailed as you can in describing the
physicality of that dance. How would you move in the world to express
that joy?

Then write for two minutes on this question: What keeps me from dancing
that dance?

She also accompanies that with a specific movement activity; for example:

* For the next thirty-seven days, when you find yourself about to proclaim
the unworthiness of someone's outfit or way of being in the world, stop.
When words that reflect judgment are on the tip of your tongue (How silly!
How ugly! How inappropriate!), pause for three seconds. Reframe those
words of judgment into positives (How joyful! How unique! How colorful!),
and say to yourself: What a wonderful way of being in the world! What an
interesting cultural norm! I really must find out more about that! Practice
being curious, not judgmental.

Reading LIFE IS A VERB was a real joy for me . . . I had to stop
often and think about the many points that Digh was making and,
also, I had to pause to enjoy the artwork in the book . . . that's
a story in itself . . . the author asked the readers of her blog to submit
artwork for possible inclusion, initially only planning to use 37
pieces . . . it turns out that she was so impressed that she used
the 120 submissions that she received.

Having read many self-help and inspirational books over the years I can with conviction say Patti's book stands out and above. Reading this book was like meeting a long lost friend or sister. I recognized stories long forgotten and needing to be remembered (perhaps archetypal). She writes with brutal honesty and the perfect balance of deep thought, pure joy, and ironic humor that speaks to my core. Many books are filled with aha moments. Those moments when a concept becomes clear, but this book is filled whacks on the head. Those moments when you remember what you already knew, and it is at the same time heart wrenching and delightful. Do not miss this book. I would give it 10 stars if I could, a hundred even!

Once a decade a book is published that delivers more than it promises. Patti Digh's voice is an Everywomen for our time. Her stories are about real people (what other kind are there? she might say). She reminds us to look beyond our myopic self interest to engage the world, to see the homeless as human first and then as people without homes. She is the high priestess of reverence for ordinary life. Kind and self effacing, her writing is wry and deep and wide. Do yourself a favor and order a case of these books. These will be gifts that keep on giving. And, be sure that your local library has a copy or three.