31 of 32 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Useful book for improving ALL relationships, April 7, 2002
This review is from: Light Her Fire: How to Ignite Passion, Joy, and Excitement in the Woman You Love (Mass Market Paperback)
Heard the taped version of Ellen Kreidman's LIGHT HER FIRE
and got a lot of useful advice from it (or at least I hope it is useful advice? laughing here--somewhat) . . . Kreidman, also author of the best-selling LIGHT HIS FIRE, presents many ideas about how to have a passionate, fun, exciting relationship . . . most if not all of what she writes seems to make a great deal of sense, and I believe it can apply to other situations as well; e.g., basic communication with friends, coworkers, children, etc.
Here were just a few of the many concepts that caught my attention:
We all have 10 vaults and 10 virtues.
When asked if you want to do something (such as go to the movies),
don't just say "OK." Respond, I'd love to go the movies with you!
Send personal notes, rather than preprinted greeting cards.
Ask what the other person wants and give it to her. If she tells you
without asking, make sure you note it!
Very romantic: A guy who has roses pout on his wife's bed for their
35th anniversary. (He has the thorns removed.) He tells her, "I've
always wanted to make love to you on a bed of roses."
Once a week, make a date night. Every three months, go away for
a weekend. Once a year, take a vacation with your spouse or
significant other.
Women need something to look forward to; e.g., a trip in six weeks.
For men, it doesn't matter as much.
Plan a special evening at least once every few months. Tell your
partner that everything has been taken care of by you.
Give kids a hug whenever you get the chance. Kiss your partner
like you mean it; i.e., a 7-second kiss.
Don't ask, "What are you doing on Saturday?' Instead say, "I'd
like to go out with you Saturday night . . . are you busy?" Use
"I" statements.
If you're together, hold your partner's hand, give her a kiss, put
your arm around her shoulder. Show the world you enjoy
being alone with her.
Schedule a lunch date, and tell your partner you're putting it in
your book.
Send a no occasion gift of flowers to her office.
Compliment your mate in front of another couple. It has three times
the impact this way.
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26 of 28 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Please get a hold of this book .. You will not be sorry!!, June 29, 1999
By A Customer
This review is from: Light Her Fire: How to Ignite Passion, Joy, and Excitement in the Woman You Love (Mass Market Paperback)
If you buy one book on relationships, this needs to be the one. I was impressed with the reviews here but it wasn't till I read the book myself that I realized what an incredible treasure it really is. Gentleman, if you really want to be all the man you can be for the love of you life please read this book. There are no magic tricks or special formulas that Ellen teaches, other than good old fashion sense that everyone should know but some how we usually don't. No matter what the state your relationship is currently in, no matter how bad or how good, I give you my word, this book can make it better. Hands down, no questions asked. She not only teaches you how to become the dream guy that all women long for, but how to really understand women's needs. I have always said that if a guy could understand women than he would be rich. Well here you go. The first 20 pages alone are worth a hundred times the price. I am not much of a spender but it was so cheap, I figured why not. Now that I understand its contents I also understand that you can not afford to not get this book. And if you are single, do yourself a favor and get a head start. That special woman will never know what hit her when she finds you. This book is a guide, a revelation, and a counselor. Enjoy, and become the most sought after guy in your city.
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32 of 38 people found the following review helpful:
3.0 out of 5 stars
Sensible, but didn't learn much from this book., January 23, 2000
By A Customer
This review is from: Light Her Fire: How to Ignite Passion, Joy, and Excitement in the Woman You Love (Mass Market Paperback)
The book is well written and I had read it quickly. However, at the end I came to a conclusion that I'm a perfect husband material as 90% of what Kreidman advises men to do is and was obvious to me. I was even insulted as a man with the way she tries to persuade her reader to do this or that by promising that this will bring him better sex with the woman of his life - just as if men were unsensitive types that canot for example hug their mate just for the sake of the hug itself, just to feel close and intimate with that special woman without any need to immediately have sex...
So - if you are a man, who doesn't give his mate flowers on no-occasion, forgets about her birthday and your marriage anniversary, doesn't tell his mate that he loves her a few times a week (and expects the same, BTW), is not eager to meet again in the evening to talk, talk and talk until bedtime, to share all that has happened or crossed your minds, considers his work more important than the time spent with familly or - even worse - prefers to have beer with friends rather than an evening walk with his wife - if you are that incredible type of man, then this is a book for you.
As for the rest of us, there is not much to learn from it, except maybe that we are not that bad and get a few nice ideas (like leaving cards around the house for her to find - I didn't come up with this!).
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