Customer Reviews

The List: 7 Ways to Tell If He's Going to Marry You--in 30 Days or Less!

5 star:		(46)
4 star:		(9)
3 star:		(5)
2 star:		(4)
1 star:		(3)

 

 

I am on my second marraige (first one ended in tragic accident) and can say that this book is on the mark. Men who are serious about a woman and in love with them will do things they never imagined themselves doing. They will act quickly and with confidence. EXCELLENT BOOK.

The Corbett sisters are right on with this book.
The List is a guide to help you take note of what is happening in your relationship and if it is REALLY worth your effort and emotion. A guy who IS that in to you and really WANTS to marry YOU will invariably fit most if not all of 7 characteristics.

Most single young women know if they're dating a lost cause, even if they cannot admit it to anyone else or themselves. Years of yo-yo-ing, hoping and praying will not change a guy who doesn't really have it in him for you. As the authors point out, if he IS going to marry you he will break all of the "guy rules". He won't be able to wait the requisite 3 days to call. He will be so anxious and excited that he will be planning your next date before the current one is over.

The List is a clever explanation of things I think we mostly know deep down inside. If he is going to marry you, if he is that smitten and interested in you that he (without prompting) does the things the authors outline...you will know. If he is going overboard and creeping you out, or if he can't seem to find the time or energy for you- he's not worth your time. You can and WILL find someone better for you.

Trust me girls (and guys) these characteristics are not things you can cultivate- they are things that HAPPEN when things are RIGHT.

I suspect most boys hate this book; until they have daughters of their own.
I think the same is true for "The Rules."
Boys would much rather string their sex partners along, and enjoy free milk.

What follows are only my opinions, formed over a half-century of observing "The Battle of the Sexes."
During which, I have been happily married for the last quarter-century.
Other than that meager credential, I offer no scientific evidence, and have no way to support my assertions.

1) Girls read books on how to get boys to marry them.

2) Boys read books on how to get girls to have sex with them.

The awful truth is that boys treat girls, whom they want to marry, differently from those with whom they just want to have sex.
A boy knows pretty much immediately, into which category a girl falls.

If he wants to marry her, he will treat her with the same respect he wants his sister or daughter to be shown.
That means nothing more than a light Good Night kiss, if that, on the first few dates.

Sorry to break this to you girls, but any more, and he mostly wants sex.
When he knows you're "The One" (Which he DOES know within three dates), he will find a way to let you know.

3) Boys fall in love quickly, they gradually fall OUT of love.

4) Girls fall in love slowly, they gradually fall IN love.

Notice I'm talking about love, and not infatuation, which lasts about six months for both boys and girls.
Nor am I talking about lust, which has a shelf-life measured in hours.

There's a reason Amazon bundles "The Rules" with "The List."
I give both of them to any girls about whom I care.

As a single guy, I love to glance at books about dating regardless of who they're written for. (Actually, I pay close attention to what the women's books say about where to meet men.)

I found this book amusing in that it boils down a complex process (meeting your future spouse) to a short checklist. It's easy to find counterexamples, at least among my married friends, but the interesting part was how the list describes a set of behaviors that an "ideal" man should follow. Making the first move, calling within a certain timeframe, etc. (Never mind that these actions will be considered "creepy" if the man is unattractive.) It's like a recipe for how a woman (or the authors) hope to be swept off their feet.

Even though dating and mating is too complex to boil down to a checklist, some of the authors' points are decent and probably correlate with marriage-minded men, even though the correlations may be weak and, as a list, incomplete.

This is an ABSOULUTELY AMAZING book. I was so impressed I wrote to the authors. It's ABOUT TIME that a book like this is available to single women out there...my only complaint about this book is WAY OVERDUE. Congrats to the Corbett sisters for distributing a TIME-TESTED SECRET in such an easily readable and relatable written work.

Happily married women have known this secret over the years but maybe haven't been able to verbalize how they knew their husbands were Mr. Right. Or maybe they were just lucky and fell in love with someone who truly loved them for who they were.

At any rate, with a book like this available, we single women don't have to rely on sheer luck in meeting a true Mr. Right. We now have guidelines to help us figure out within 1 MONTH whether Mr. Right Now deserves any more of our time ( I think 1 month is generous). I know I sound harsh, but there are too many of us "servicing men" (like an earlier post succintly mentioned) and boosting their egos until that man meets the woman of their dreams. Despite many misinterpretations, this book is NOT about getting a guy to marry you within 1 month because of loudly ticking biological clocks. This book about NOT wasting time on men who have no intention of having a future with you. It's about making wiser choices and finding that true SOULMATE that adds value to your life instead of wasting your valuable time. Know that YOU ARE FABULOUS AT ANY AGE (haven't we learned that from Sex in the City?). However, let's face it...if we want children, we likely have to work on that by atleast 40ish...that's the UNFORTUNATE BIOLOGICAL TRUTH. Even if you don't want to have children, face the fact that life is short so why not be eager to spend your journey with someone who ENRICHES YOUR LIFE.

I, too, have been burned by a guy who was wasting my time and was completly unloving. In the 8 years I spent with him, I couldn't honestly check off any of the 7 items on the list. But, the cruel way the relationship ended was enough to wake me up to the truth. This book, besides making me feel foolish for my blunders, confirmed that for the future I need to act smarter and pay attention to red flags and dealbreakers. In this day and age, Ladies, DON'T SETTLE FOR LESS THAN YOU DESERVE!

This book is about single women first, loving and approving of themselves and recognizing that they are DESERVING of someone who TRULY loves them, approves of them too. Men deserve the same. We may not have the instinctual alarm that men have to know they've met the One, so we need some wisdom to help us out. Now, go read this book!

As a 22 year old woman; experienced in the field of dating, I thought I "got" men. After reading this book, so much fell into place and it made me look at past relationships and say to myself "duh, why didn't you see that?" Their time line is clear and concise and knocks down not only the excuses men make, but the excuses we make for them. The Corbett sisters share their own experiences and those of other women, in a frank and honest light, without making the road to love seem dark and dismal, like many other dating books. Now that I've read the book, I only want to date "List Men." This book was like talking to an older married girlfriend, who tells it like it is. It was an easy pleasant read, that I plan on passing on to my other single girlfriends.

But I would have dumped my husband 30 days after meeting him if I were following "the List", and well, I think he's a pretty great guy, so that would have been a shame!

I bought this because of the (what I thought was) ridiculous sub-title, as I've been trying to encourage a friend of mine who suffers from the "Oh geez.. I'm 30 and I'm not married and don't have a boyfriend and never meet anyone..." stuff. I needed some ideas on how to eloquently say "guys aren't this complicated, if he's not calling, let's not over-analyze..." So I bought this and read it in hopes of being able to give her some somewhat more thoughtful and sensitive advice.

I like the perspective of -if he's not going to call, he's not "the one" so don't worry about it and don't wait, because even if he finally does call, you'll have to say "no" to a date...if he's not that into you, he doesn't deserve you.

But as with many commercial successes, this is a bit overly simplistic, and really best "used" only by women who are more interested in the destination rather than the journey. I can understand that if the journey includes being led-on and disappointed, it is best avoided, but personally, I kind of liked my journey with my now-husband. Neither of us fell in love within 30 days, and to be honest, I wasn't looking for, and didn't think of him as "marriage material" from the get-go: which is probably why we had so much fun and I never worried about any of these list items. I can recall several times when he didn't call everyday, or times that he chose his job or friends over me for a night or a weekend here and there. And -gasp- I did the same! Somewhere along the line we both realized that it was more than just fun, and now we have our slightly dysfunctional "fairy tale" ending. But and I'm pretty sure that he would have failed on every list item within the first 30 days of knowing each other. I'm just excited to share this book with my friend- maybe not so much for the strict "rules" but for the perspective.


And also- come to think of it, I really wouldn't recommend this book to any women under... 30 or so. Because until she's had time to play the field and has dated a few guys who are kind of jerks or players, she'll likely to not appreciate a "List Man" and might tend to think that he is a total putz.

If you are a single woman wanting to get married--read this book! As the Corbett sisters write, when you have found "the one," there are no games, no rules, no gimmicks--the relationship just flows naturally and easily. When I read this book, much of it rang true for me. Girlfriends agree that there is a lot of truth and advice packed into this little book. No need for ultimatums or feeling sorry for yourself because you're alone again, having wasted your time on yet another wrong man. This is an intimate and special book that tells it like it is. Read it and you will learn how to recognize the man and the moment and the marriage you want--with the right man for you.

How refreshing to read a book with a such a positive outlook on dating and finding love. You don't need to change a thing about yourself if you are "the one"-- I love it when the authors say "It doesn't matter if you want five kids, it doesn't matter if you have five kids" if you are "the one" you can do no wrong, he will love you "as is". This is a great read for women of all ages. It's the wisdom that you wish you had in your 20's. If you are ready for true love and acceptance from a man instead of excuses and stalling tactics, you'll enjoy this book.

If you are ready to be married, then this is the book for you. If you're not, then don't bother. My husband of 9 years followed EVERY ONE of the items on the list. He talked about marriage within 30 days, starting getting more specific about marriage to ME within 60 days, and in about 7 months after our first date we were engaged. I never doubted his affections, never questioned how he felt about me. If a man wants to marry you, you will know it and this book tells you what to look for.