Listening to Midlife [Paperback]

Mark Gerzon (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: March 5, 1996 | Series: Listening to midlife

Based on interviews with a wide variety of men and women and research on the literature of adult development, Mark Gerzon answers the question, "Is it possible that human beings experience a profound metamorphosis in midlife?" with a resounding "yes."

Editorial Reviews

From Library Journal

Best-selling author Gerzon describes with painful honesty the trials and tribulations he encountered as he entered into midlife. In addition to his own experience, he has interviewed many others, famous and not famous, who have experienced and overcome the personal doubt that will plague most of us sometime between the ages of 35 and 55. Through his story and the stories of others, Gerzon shows us that this time of "midlife crisis" can become a period of personal growth and achievement. It offers us the opportunity to change what we have been and become whole and happy individuals. Noting that every person's journey will be different, Gerzon demonstrates that with a little courage and a lot of honesty, the second half of life can be even more rewarding than the first. Recommended.
Elizabeth Caulfield Felt, Washington State Univ., Pullman
Copyright 1995 Reed Business Information, Inc.

From Booklist

Gerzon brings enthusiasm and a joyous voice to those dreading the second half of their lives. He challenges us to see that time as a metamorphosis, a quest during which the signposts are the questions we ask ourselves. Each person's growth after age 40 is unpredictable and unique. We must reject the lie that to age is to be broken and seek wholeness, instead: "We yearn to live our unlived lives." Gerzon prompts middle-agers to resist change, postpone procrastination, get untrapped, and reveal their hidden selves. He insists that the only way out of crisis is through it. The book offers practical and convincing methods for the sandwich generation to deal with changes in relationships, careers, family, body, mind, and spirit. Aging must be a time during which we produce life, not merely prolong it. We must age deeply not just slowly. Gerzon agrees with Jung that one must stop theorizing and just "follow your nose." Middle-agers whose lives need a kick in the pants should follow their noses to this book. Patricia Hassler

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Product Details

• Paperback: 336 pages
• Publisher: Shambhala; 1st Shambhala ed edition (March 5, 1996)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1570621683
• ISBN-13: 978-1570621680
• Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.9 x 8.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 13.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (12 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #325,943 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

60 of 61 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Midlife soul searching., July 28, 2001

By 

G. Merritt (Boulder, CO) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Listening to Midlife (Paperback)

By midlife, many people derive their personal identities from college degrees, marriage, careers, children, and their material possessions. In our middle years, Freud says that we look for ourselves in work and love. "Inexplicable exhaustion, mysterious pain, insomnia, uncontrollable crying, profound dissatisfaction at work" are all symptoms of a midlife transition (p. 22). "Deny your body's message too long," Mark Gerzon warns, "and you may get sick. Deny your mind's warnings, and you may go crazy. Deny your soul too long, and you may lose it" (p. 36).

I arrived at this book adrift at 43, with my life in transition, yearning for a greater sense of authenticity in my life. "In the second half of life," Gerzon writes, "our old compasses no longer work. The magnetic fields alter. The new compass that we need cannot be held in our hand, only in our heart. We read it not with our mind alone, but with our soul . . . Now we yearn for wholeness" (p. 5). In his insightful examination of body, marriage, work, aging, our planet, and spirituality, Gerzon reassures us that "aging has meaning" (p. 182). He encourages to adjust our thinking to view a midlife transition as a natural opportunity for personal growth, rather than as a crisis. Seen this way, the "private, lonely, and often unchartered journey" (p. 107) through midlife becomes a time for "healing deep wounds, seeking our soul/mate, caring for our families, committing ourselves to a true Calling, respecting the aging process and our elders" (p. 220). It is a time, Gerzon writes, for having the "ultimate affair with the ultimate stranger: your shadow" (p. 109). Midlife is an opportunity for transformation, for facing the shadows of our personalty (p. 81), for paying attention to disillusionments (p. 109), for bringing heaven down into our daily lives (pp. 263-64), and for listening to our dreams, our "inner elders" (p. 274).

This five-star book offers wisdom and clarity to any reader attempting to make sense of the journey through midlife.

G. Merritt

32 of 34 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars If your old compass is broken..., April 8, 2000

By 

Mark Elliott Smith "Tahoe Mark" (Incline Village, Nevada) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Listening to Midlife (Paperback)

I discovered this book early in my crisis. Three years later I still routinely consult Gerzon's wisdom. I've read volumes trying to find my through what he calls The Forest Dark, and no words have rung truer than those found in Listening to Midlife. It's a masterpiece and, for those of us with a malfunctioning compass, a light to guide us through what can be the most terrifying time of adult life. His best advice: Have the Ultimate Affair with the Ultimate Stranger - Your Shadow.

Mark has been there, he knows the way through.

22 of 23 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Excellent book for someone feeeling totally confused., August 14, 1999

By A Customer

This review is from: Listening to Midlife (Paperback)

I was totally confused about where I was and where I wanted to go with the rest of my life. Mark Gerzon gives wonderful examples of others that have faced similar questions in their own life from Buzz Aldrin to many of his own everyday patients. Although not every chapter was of interest, I found this to be an excellent jumping off place for my own quest to integrate my "Shadow Side" with the successful life I had achieved so far. I wish I had read this before I started my own search for my "second half of my life" identity.