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The Little Book of Big Excuses: More Strategies and Techniques for Faking It
 
 
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The Little Book of Big Excuses: More Strategies and Techniques for Faking It [Paperback]

Addie Johnson (Author)
4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (1 customer review)

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Book Description

May 2007
Nobody ever said being an adult was easy. But it's easier with The Little Book of Big Excuses, with hundreds of excuses for things you did, things you didn't do, things you did wrong, and things you never want to hear about again. First things first: "Fake Don't Flake." In here are your excuses for being late for or not showing up to any number of places for any number of reasons--grandma's birthday party, work, home, weddings, dentists appointments.

"Excusez-Moi, si'l vous plait" is where to look when you're caught wearing a halter top to a black tie event. Or forget your boss's spouse's name--again. Or don't want to pick up the tab. The French have a word for everything.

If you need to learn how to say "I'd Love to, but"--the art of articulating just why you can't do most anything you don't want to do--in any language, this is the book for you. Demonstrate your incompetence. When someone asks you to bring those complicated hors d'oeuvres, show up half an hour late with half the ingredients. Bonus section here: how to get someone else to do all the work while you still get the credit.

"Delivery Subsystem Failure--Mailboxes, Messages, Missives Gone Awry, Oh My!" Never, ever again will you want for an excuse for not writing, calling, IMing, or emailing. Fake communication breakdowns make fail-safe excuses for a myriad of don't wannas and didn't do its.

"All's Fair in Love" contains excuses for not calling, not going on the second date, forgetting the birthday or anniversary of the one you love. Plus how to retreat with remorse, even from the altar steps. Hint: You could have your mother or your manager phone it in. That's what Julia Roberts did.

* Hundreds of excuses for thousands of situations, plus "The Excuse Clinic: How to Make Lame Excuses Walk and Okay Excuses Sing."

* Life is serious business, people, so pay attention. Let Addie help you off the hook.


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The Little Book of Big Excuses: More Strategies and Techniques for Faking It + The Complete Excuses Handbook: The Definitive Guide to Avoiding Blame and Shirking Responsibility for All Your Own Miserable Failings and Sloppy Mistakes + Excuses and Lies for All Occasions (Lines for All Occasions)
Price For All Three: $32.47

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Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Addie Johnson grew up in San Francisco, went east to go to Vassar College, and never bothered to leave New York. She's an actor and helps run Rising Phoenix Rep, a small developmental theatre company. She's also an editor and writer, and this is her first book. She lives in Brooklyn with her family, who never believe her excuses, but she won't stop trying.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 149 pages
  • Publisher: Conari Press (May 2007)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1573243132
  • ISBN-13: 978-1573243131
  • Product Dimensions: 6.8 x 5 x 0.5 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 4.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (1 customer review)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,042,176 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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1 of 2 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars Funny and incredible, January 25, 2008
This review is from: The Little Book of Big Excuses: More Strategies and Techniques for Faking It (Paperback)
Lots of the excuses and stories are outrageous and funny. I passed this on to a friend, who was speechless. I'm saving the best excuse for a major emergency ... Someone put food in my shoes.
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