Little Girls Can Be Mean: Four Steps to Bully-proof Girls in the Early Grades [Paperback]

Michelle Anthony (Author), Reyna Lindert (Author)

Book Description

Release date: August 17, 2010

Worried about mean girls? Help your daughter respond and react to bullying where it starts---in elementary school

As experts in developmental psychology and each a mother of three, Dr. Michelle Anthony and Dr. Reyna Lindert began noticing an alarming pattern of social struggle among girls as young as five, including their own daughters. In today’s world, it is likely that your daughter has been faced with bullying and friendship issues, too---and perhaps you’re at a loss for how to guide her through these situations effectively. Little Girls Can Be Mean is the first book to tackle the unique social struggles of elementary-aged girls, giving you the tools you need to help your daughter become stronger, happier, and better able to enjoy her friendships at school and beyond.

Dr. Anthony and Dr. Lindert offer an easy-to-follow, 4-step plan to help you become a problem-solving partner with your child, including tips and insights that girls can use on their own to confront social difficulties in an empowered way. Whether your daughter is just starting grade school or is already on her way to junior high, you’ll learn how to:

OBSERVE the social situation with new eyes
CONNECT with your child in a new way
GUIDE your child with simple, compassionate strategies
SUPPORT your daughter to act more independently to face the social issue

By focusing squarely on the issues and needs of girls in the years before adolescence, Little Girls Can Be Mean is the essential, go-to guide for any parent or educator of girls in grades K-6.

Editorial Reviews

From Booklist

From clinical studies to mainstream media, the problem of girl aggression has been the subject of growing concern, but most of the recent focus has been on middle- and high-school students, not on elementary-school girls. That’s part of the problem, argue the authors of this reassuring guide that offers practical tips and personal anecdotes aimed at alleviating female “relational aggression” in the critical early grades. In each chapter, the authors, both developmental psychologists, illustrate how adults can guide girls through a four-step process to identify and deal with tough social situations. Throughout, boxed activities for educators, parents, and girls themselves give the title a highly interactive, proactive feel, and an appended section suggests ways that adults can apply the same techniques to their own lives. More than just invaluable advice about preparing girls to cope with bullying, gossip, and friendship riffs, these are empowering strategies for adults to communicate and connect with their daughters while they are at a highly receptive age and to help them develop resilient self-esteem before they hit the middle-school jungle. --Gillian Engberg

Review

PRAISE FOR LITTLE GIRLS CAN BE MEAN:

“More than ever, young girls are facing painful social challenges that require real skills to respond…offers useful strategies and tools to help parents empower their daughters from the earliest ages."
-Rachel Simmons, bestselling author of Odd Girl Out and The Curse of the Good Girl

“A valuable guide for understanding and demystifying the friendship issues, social cruelty, and bullying of elementary-aged girls. A must-have book for parents, counselors, and educators.”
- Rosalind Wiseman, bestselling author of Queen Bees and Wannabes

"From clinical studies to mainstream media, the problem of girl aggression has been the subject of growing concern, but most of the recent focus has been on middle- and high-school students, not on elementary-school girls. That's part of the problem, argue the authors of this reassuring guide, which offers practical tips and personal anecdotes aimed at alleviating female "relational aggression" in the critical early grades. In each chapter, the authors, both developmental psychologists, illustrate how adults can guide girls through a four-step process to identify and deal with tough social situations. Throughout, boxed activities for educators, parents, and girls themselves give the tide a highly interactive, proactive feel, and an appended section suggests ways that adults can apply the same techniques to their own lives. More than just invaluable advice about preparing girls to cope with bullying, gossip, and friendship riffs, these are empowering strategies for adults to communicate and connect with their daughters while they are at a highly receptive age and to help them develop resilient self-esteem before they hit the middle-school jungle." -- Booklist

 

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 304 pages
• Publisher: St. Martin's Griffin (August 17, 2010)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0312615523
• ISBN-13: 978-0312615529
• Product Dimensions: 8.2 x 5.6 x 0.8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 11.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (30 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #3,737 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #90 in Books > Self-Help > Relationships > Interpersonal Relations

More About the Author

Discover books, learn about writers, read author blogs, and more.

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

48 of 49 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars An EXCEPTIONAL and NECESSARY tool for both parents and professionals August 23, 2010

By P. Gershefski

Format:Paperback

As a clinical psychologist, I find that parents are often stuck between a rock and a hard place when it comes to supporting their daughters' social struggles. And so often, educators and counselors are stuck in the same hard place with helping support these parents, or in supporting the girls themselves.

FINALLY there's a guide that does it all: gives parents a simple easy plan to support girls' friendship fights while at the same time gives them the tools to help manage social cruelty! Even better, integrated throughout are Teacher Tips and Tips for Girls with ideas and activities to reach girls in grades K-6. The flow of the book is anecdotal, very readable, and non-alarmist.

In fact, it will help you finally understand why girls act the way they do, and know what to do about it. This book is for anyone who works with or cares about girls from ages 5-12. It's become the first book I recommend to parents in my clinical practice with elementary aged girls. I love it!

17 of 17 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars very helpful August 21, 2010

By Bonnie Neely

Format:Paperback

Little Girls Can Be Mean by Michelle Anthony and Reyna Lindert is a very helpful book by these two experts in the field of psychology and parenting, authors of several other books. And each of these moms has three children, so they speak from first hand experience also. The book tells four steps to helping young girls learn how to be kind to other girls and how to keep themselves from being devastated when other girls are not kind to them. With advice to parents and teachers to Observe, Connect, Guide, and Support to Act, the authors give many good examples for ages 5 - 12 of what is actual behavior of girls toward each other, at home and at school and other groups. There are many useful techniques to learn in this book of how to help your daughter protect herself and also learn how to deflate these troubling encounters. With the use of playing games, and talking, empathizing, and sharing personal experiences parents can guide their daughters through the minefield of growing up and inter-personal relationships with friends and siblings. Each chapter has boxes of information that are written directly to the child and other boxes of directed to the adult...each has good suggestions and observations and ideas to practice. This is a very good tool for any home or teacher.

11 of 11 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars A great book for grandparents! August 24, 2010

By Grandma Roberta

Format:Paperback

As a grandparent, I was so glad to find this book! It seems girls are so much meaner today than when my kids were growing up and already I am hearing terrible stories from my granddaughters. Before, I would say things like, "try not to let it bother you," or "she's not very nice...find a different friend." But it was mostly because I didn't know what to say. Now I do! The book walks you through the how and why of meanness, but in a way that makes you feel like you can actually do something about it! The Four Step plan is simple and gives me options in terms of when, where, and how much to go into things at any given point. For me, as a grandparent, I use Steps one and two the most: seeing things in new ways and connecting, instead of jumping in and trying to fix it all. I can't think of a more important book for elementary school girls!