Customer Reviews

Living Beyond Limits

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When I was diagnosed with cancer, how to think about it, and how to deal with fear of dying were top on my list. People handed me books by Bernie Siegel, and I just couldn't relate. I didn't want anything that told me that I had caused my cancer or that I could magically "think myself well." I know that attitude is part of healing, but I experienced most of those "heal yourself" books as blaming and counterproductive.

Spiegel is wonderful. I read his book three times in quick succession. I really wanted to internalize that way of looking at things. I also bought extra copies of the book, to give to family and close friends. I told them, "This is how I want to think about what's happening to me. This is how I want to talk about it." The part of the book I liked best was where he talks about fears. Fears of the unknown (like fears of dying or fears about chronic illness) can be overwhelming. However, if you break the fears into little pieces, you can figure out how to deal with each of the pieces.

Spiegel is honest, yet very compassionate, understanding, and comforting. His research on how support groups and coping with emotions affect quality and length of life is intriguing and reassuring. I would heartily recommend this book to any cancer patient, or others with a life-threatening condition.

Sadly, I must say that I am very dissappointed with this overly indulgent book. It is such an important topic, that I would have thought that Spiegel would have taken more care to write it in a way that would be helpful to patients, such as me. But instead, I find his poorly organized writing style, his apparent stream of consciousness, and his haughtiness to border on offensiveness. It seems as if he likes to preach, but really does not have a good grasp of the experience of cancer. While he covers important topics, he does it in a manner that seems to be on the one hand paternalistic admonition, and on the other hand theoretical academics. I can only wonder if he truly feels what he writes, or if this is simply a launching pad for his career.