Customer Reviews

Long-Distance Grandparenting: Connecting With Your Grandchildren from Afar

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This is the only self-help long-distance grandparenting book you'll ever need to read. Regretfully, "Over the river and through the woods to Grandma's house we go," no longer applies to most families in this day and age, but this book delves nicely into bridging the miles between grandparents and their grandchildren. It is the ideal primer for grandparents to stay in touch and be involved in their grandchildren's lives. Author, Willma Willis Gore's, Long-Distance Grandparenting -- Connecting with Your Grandchildren from Afar, is both an inspirational and motivational book that hones in precisely on how to cope with guilt ridden days and the longing so many grandparents experience from time to time. I've enjoyed and admired the author's other books, and she's done it again -- this one's a must read too!

Today's Grandparents Preserve Yesterday's Ties

... a New Book Tells Us How

by Susan Stewart

The American nuclear family, as defined by the iconic Leave It To Beaver and other television sitcoms during the 1950s and `60s is--more than half a century later--the exception rather than the rule. High rates of divorce, the emergence of "blended" families, single and same gender parenting, and a much more mobile society have all contributed to a dramatic redefinition of family. And the "extended" family as we once knew it--those eccentric aunts, feisty uncles, quirky cousins, and beloved grandparents who used to live nearby--has all but disappeared. Today's grandparents are traversing entirely new territory, both literally and figuratively. And the distances can be daunting.

Long-Distance Grandparenting, Connecting with your Grandchildren from Afar offers a sturdy bridge for the many modern grandparents left wondering how they will adjust to this ever-shifting landscape. Award-winning author and grandmother for some twenty-five years, Willma Willis Gore has written a book that is entertaining, informative, practical, and poignant.

"All grandparenting experiences are not created equal," writes Gore in the introduction. "Grandparents sometimes become rivals. Money can be scarce, time and transportation can be problems. Schedules conflict." So Gore interviewed dozens of grandparents, their children and grandchildren and infused every chapter with their stories, often quoting them directly.

Ten well-titled chapters, anecdotes with headings, and a comprehensive resources section steer the reader easily toward the most helpful sections. How does one, for example, deal with the concept of "rules" when parents and grandparents differ? Chapter 2, titled "Rules for Grandparents, Parents, and Grandkids" offers sound, effective guidelines.

What about the murky waters of giving advice? Try Chapter 4, "Risks and Rewards of Grandparent Advice." What happens when grandchildren move overseas? One anecdote is headed, "When the Split Takes the Grandchild Far Away."

The practical importance of thank-yous, the reinvention of letter-writing, and the magic of the internet are explored. And a special chapter just for men offers often-neglected grandfathers unique methods for cultivating special ties beyond the usual fishing, fixing, and phoning.

The author also addresses the less tangible aspects of long-distance grandparenting, such as understanding that perfection is an impractical goal, that change is the only constant, and that knowing when to say "no" is crucial to preserving honest, loving relationships

Clashing grandparents, truculent teens, confusing messages, and sibling rivalry are all discussed, with practical, inventive, and thorough advice for each. Never preachy and far from sappy, Long-Distance Grandparenting is written with brevity, humor, and heart.

Its inclusive approach does not judge or even opine; rather it illustrates the many faces of grandparents today and addresses the change with stoic optimism.

Real-life solutions from authentic situations are the hallmark of this charming book. Long-Distance Grandparenting gives readers the feeling that anyone can find creative ways to establish and sustain a loving connection with their grandchildren--preserving and protecting one precious and irreplaceable relationship in the ever-changing face of the American family.

Nowadays many of us find ourselves not living near to our grandkids. In order to keep in touch, Long Distance Grandparenting, has some delightful and innovative ideas to keep in touch with your grandkids and make sure they know who you really are for themselves--not just what their parents have told them.

Author Willma Gore has done a great job of gathering diverse information into one easy to read and delightful book.

Highly recommended for all grandparents.

Long-Distance Grandparenting is as loaded with ideas for building relationships with far-off young ones as a farm-house table at Thanksgiving. It doesn't matter whether the children you seek to befriend are grandchildren or greats, nieces or nephews, bewildered toddlers or surly teens. It makes no difference whether you are related by blood or were drafted into the family some other way, whether the young people live down the block or, as is more often the case, halfway across the continent.

You must make unflagging efforts to get into and stay in these kids' lives so you'll be there when they need you, or to impart a set of values they may not be getting at home, or to underscore values they have been presented, or to provide consistency in the midst of turmoil, or to create memories that will bring them joy later on, or simply because you love them and you must be involved.

Long-distance love affairs are hard enough when both sides are trying. With kids and older folks, often the youth do little, if anything, to keep the relationship mutual. You need ideas--and lots of them--till you find one or more that works for each of the children you love. Gore's 85 pages are packed with experiences of how real people have engaged in the delicate dance of winning over younger ones without offending the parents. There--I hinted: there are warnings, something no guide to long-distance grandparenting could be complete without!

The book can easily be browsed or read at one sitting. Or read and browsed again. Reread. The cover illustration of a tin can connected by telephone cord to a cellphone sums up the problem. The pages that follow illustrate many solutions.

The wisdom in this book is so extensive, coming as it does from people with many and varied backgrounds and experiences, that it will be attractive and enlightening even for individuals who do not have grandchildren. The fundamental qualities which compose the subject are love, patience, thoughtfulness, generosity, careful planning and, above all, connectedness. Some of the situations between elders and their grandchildren which are so well described here can be applied in other human relationships such as teaching, resolving family grudges, and renewing and keeping old friendships. Primarily, though, this is a book for those grandparents who yearn for their grandchildren, but who cannot see them frequently because of the distances (both psychological and physical,) so common in today's complicated world. "Long-Distance Grandparenting", by Willma Willis Gore, should be recommended for purchase by such people, and kept as a staple in every public library. Ann Williams, Bakersfield, California

This book will make a terrific gift for any grandparent who does not live right around the corner from his or her grands. Beyond the advice on how to stay connected, Gore offers pages and pages of first person accounts from people who have found ways to build strong lasting relationships with their grands, in spite of distance, divorce, illness and other factors of life. This little book is well written, well organized, and a fun quick read--and as soon as I finished it, of course, I called my grandkids--because, in addition to all the helpful tips, this book raised my awareness of how important we are in our grandchildren's lives, and how much influence we have over them... just by loving them unconditionally.

I was a bit disappointed with this book. I feel the title is mis-leading. I live in Canada and my parents are in Australia. I was looking for a book with great ideas to help my kids maintain a close relationship with their grandparents. This book talks more about how to connect with grandkids when they visit. I don't think we have any problems in that regard.

This book was an easy read. I would have liked to be more specific about the relationship building between grandparents/parents/and children. But it gave ever good suggestions.

This book is not what I expected. Instead of solid advice on specific topics, this book contains many little snippets of how grandparents solved their own problems. While this advice can be helpful, it is haphazardly arranged into "chapters." For instance, if you want to find suggestions for dealing with sibling jealousy/rivalry you'll have to wander through the book. In addition, this advice is from other grandparents, not experts. While I appreciate some "real grandparent" advice, I would also like some professional background on the topics, the whys and multiple suggestions on how to deal with problems or avoid them in the first place. I did read reviews and excerpts before deciding which book to order. While this book is well written and fairly entertaining to read, it falls short of my expectations.

With brevity, humor and years of experience, Gore tackles some of the challenges of long-distance grandparenting with her usual skill.