Customer Reviews

Looking Out For #1

5 star:		(25)
4 star:		(8)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(2)
1 star:		(1)

 

 

Ringer's book has literally changed my life. I often find myself thinking back to the words I had read, or flipping through pages of specific sections to remind me of his philosophies. Especially when I am dealing with difficult people. This book provided the words and methods on how to conduct oneself in order to fulfill whatever goals you set for yourself.

I do NOT consider myself a follower of everything the book spews at me. And I don't particularly agree with EVERYTHING the book states either. The beauty of this publication is that you are always free to disagree with certain positions that Ringer takes, and yet still benefit from the rest of his literature.

Anyone who I have encountered who dissed the book, I later end up finding out, never actually read it. The title does scare people away. Luckily it scares the "wrong" people away anyway. I strongly recommend this book to anyone who is struggling with the inner conflict of what they want or need to do for themselves vs. what they feel they should do.

Although, slightly dated in its refrences, this book has undone years worth of damage I have suffered in the education system (I am about to start my second Masters degree) and has also given me the rational to deal with turbulant personalities, whether they be family, friends, or business associates.

I bought this book for 33 1/3 cents in a used book store, and knowing now what it has offered me in the area of betterment in my life, I would gladly have paid 30 or 40 dollars. You simply can't make a better investment in a life altering book!

Recently I was asked if I could meet anybody in the world, who would it be. I say it would be Ringer, for nothing more that to say thank-you for putting his thoughts in writing.

Again, I stress that I absolutely do NOT agree with everything the man says, but I still have to give it my full thumbs up. And for me, thats says alot.

As others -- including Ringer himself -- have said, this is NOT a book about disregarding the rights and feelings of everyone but yourself. In fact, according to the principles presented in the book, such disregard is ultimately self-defeating. This book IS about having a realistic understanding of what motivates everyone including yourself. Like it or not, people want to make the best deal they can make for themselves -- which means if you believe everyone has a moral/ethical obligation to respond to your needs, you'll constantly be disappointed, frustrated, hurt, and a prime target for every con artist with swamp land to sell. How many people do you know who are bitter and angry over life not giving them a better deal -- but who have never given anybody any reason to offer them one? Conversely, if you go through life determined to show everyone how totally selfless you are, you'll also constantly be disappointed, frustrated, hurt, and a prime target for every con artist with swamp land to sell. How many people do you know who are bitter and angry over all the "totally unselfish" things they've done that have gone unrecognized and unrewarded -- and who might be better off and better liked if they'd acknowledge the hidden price tag?

I'm not trying to lecture you, but to present Ringer's message in the best light. One reason I've found his book useful is that I've been both of those people I mentioned above. But I'm not anxious to discuss my own imperfections, so back to the book.

Ringer divides life into a series of "hurdles" that must be cleared in order to reach the "finish line" called success. The order in which these are presented may seem odd at first, but ultimately proves to make sense. For example, why put Friendship and Love after Finance, when many folks probably feel they'd like to take care of the basic human need for friendship and love first, then worry about finding gainful employment? Because of a basic rule that applies to all three situations, but is easiest to accept when seeking gainful employment -- that if you want someone to give you something of value, you have to offer them something of value. It makes more sense to introduce that rule in a context where the reader will accept it, then make the point that it applied in other areas where people don't expect it to.

My only quibble with the order of presentation concerns the chapter on crusades, which seems a bit like an intrusion -- although, to be fair, I'm not sure where I'd have put it.

And I feel the book has two other, bigger problems. First, it seems slanted toward men. This comes across partly in many of the examples, and partly in the coarseness of some of the language. Okay, so there are plenty of women out there who indulge in coarse language as well, but if you;re gonna publish a book, which is presumably aimed at the entire country, you gotta think of the big picture. Even if coarse language doesn't indicate gender bias, it indicates some kind of bias.

The second, and more serious problem is that Ringer is essentially an articulate layman, which means that he (a) may not be qualified to make some of the statements he makes, and (b) lacks (or at least fails to demonstrate) an understanding of how his philosophy fits into the established body of ethical and psychological thought.

The example of (a) that really jumped out at me was the statement that you shouldn't stay in a bad relationship because of children, since children will be worse off growing up with two unhappy parents than with a single parent. Intuitively, this makes sense, but I would act on it without consulting a few child psychologists and/or looking up the statistics.

Regarding (b), Ringer appears first of all to be unaware that the ethical system of rational selfishness is one of three recognized systems. The other two are (1) do what's most beneficial to the greatest number of people, and (2) assume there is a set of absolute moral rules and do what they tell you. Ringer might have had more credibility of he'd acknowledge these systems and defended rational selfishness against them.

But the real killer is that the assumption on which he bases the entire book has been shown to be flawed. This is the assumption that everybody seeks to act in his/her own best interest all the time, even when this appears not to be so. The flaw in that assumption lies in its apparent flawlessness. Every hypothetical situation you can dream up can be explained in terms of the assumption being true. One of Ringers examples is a man who goes to a flower show with his wife instead of doing something he'd rather do. This man is acting in his own best interest because he figures the pleasure he'd get from whatever he wanted to do is outweighed by the trouble he'll be in if he doesn't go to the flower show.

Well, it turns out that because you can't devise a situation that would prove the assumption false, you can't devise a truly reliable test of its validity. Such a test consists of s situation in which there will definitely be one outcome if the assumption is true, and another outcome if the assumption is false. You can't set up such a situation if every possible outcome of every possible situation indicates that the assumption is true.

But that doesn't make book is worthless. The problem I just pointed out occurs only if you read Ringer's statement as an unqualified, all encompassing assumption. If you soften it to something like "Most people should be expected to be motivated by self-interest most of the time," that's another story.

We have to take care of ourselves before we can be of much use to anyone else. In order to give, I need to have something to give. And Robert Ringer offers his advice on how to take care of yourself.

He deals with friends, financial matters and romance, to name a few. He gives examples of his great triumphs, many of which he learned after his big time failures. While he accepts no irresponsible excuses, he still writes with empathy -- he knows he has made mistakes, too. And because he has risen above them, he has earned his right to advise his readers.

His humor and ability to coin phrases are unbelievable! Many times I remind myself not to let the "Pop off mess up man" take over(read it and find out what that means).

My favorite section of the book is his chapter on building a strong, solid financial life.

Read it! And be entertained and taught at the same time.

When I tried reading this book in college, I really couldn't relate. After a few years in the "jungle" (in my case NYC, financial difficulty, relationship problems), I felt that this book, unlike others which focus almost exclusively on positive, optimistic, and goal-seeking attitudes as answers to life, was on the money.

Robert writes about value-for-value relationships (akin to the law of kharma/psychological reciprocity), and how this concept determines the outcome and rewards of relationships, whether love, friendship or employer.

I have studied psychology, and have read more than twenty self-help books, and though this might be a little surprising (in the sense that people might find it cynical to an extent), I think there's so much truth to it. And because of the title, I found myself telling people "it's a good message - it's not about stepping on others." In fact, when one looks out for him/herself, that's when he can give or provide to someone else if he/she wants, and what he or she can give. So, it's also a message of independence. I've seen it happen where people help and give, sometimes giving what they cannot, and they end up frustrated, and things are worse than where they begin.

Though the book might seem a bit cynical, I think it is on the money, and Robert was an author who could come forth and talk about reality (though I think we all need to escape it once in a while, or not focus on the negativity).

I can related to a lot of what is in this book, though sometimes I do not want to believe in all of it - but it's reality. And I've found myself losing touch with it at the wrong times, and this book gives me a great message that will prepare me for future situations.

Good job Robert.

Robert Ringer is a writer who has studied Ayn Rand and Objectivism and has always put great stock in both. He is a libertarian and a free thinker. He believes in individualism.

When I first read this book some three decades ago I didn't know about Rand or Objectivism or really much about libertarians, with the capital L or without.

So re-reading it and now knowing about all of the above I enjoyed it even more than the first time and I believe strongly in everything he wrote.

I read a reviewer who said that it is not relevant today as we work in teams. We don't all work in teams. Most of us do not. And even if we do it has nothing at all to do with the fact we must look out for ourselves first.

This is a great book for anyone. It is as good today as it was thirty years ago.

Among all the self help books that I have read, this is on the short list of classics. What makes this book unique is that it focuses on the two things that can really help you; truth and reason. Ringer applies these to people, the world and everyday life. This is one of the few books that I've read that is refreshingly honest. The author pulls no punches and tells things the way they are. The book may be intimidating to some people because it is the raw truth and this can be frightening. It is best to face the truth because only in truth does one find power. Ringer begins by showing how perspective orients us to the world, and how people have differing perspectives. He shows why it is important to base your actions on truth and reason and why a failure to do so can lead to disaster. Some people may find truth unpleasent, but this really is a problem of perspective. What appears terrible may really be a blessing in disguise. One should not focus exclusivley on the negative but look at the positive side too. Bad experiences for instance can toughen you up, make you stronger and more self reliant. In one chapter on finance, Ringer gives his experiences about being left destitute, but he looked on the positive side-theres always a positive side, if you look hard enough- and used it to his advantage. If one wants to survive and do well in this world, he must arm himself with truth. This book does a splendid job in showing that.

Years ago I picked up this little gem because of its intriguing title. Over the years I've gone back and re-read it many times. I can honestly say that where I have failed (or succeeded) in life it was because of my adherence, or lack thereof, of the basic, universal truths which Ringer has elaborated in his book. Ringer did not invent these principles--just as Newton did not invent gravitaion.

Ringer covers all the bases: personal relationships, money, work, and the importance of striving to see the world as it is--not as we might like it to be.

If you are unhappy, dissatisfied, or wonder why things are not quite the way you would like them to be, then chances are that you will find an answer in this book.

My only conern about this book is the title " Looking out for No 1 " seems selfish it can be so easy to be mislead. "Lifes Hurdles" may be more appropriate. I like this book it simple to read and packs a punch! The hurdles: Love,people,money,relationships,perspective,and more are covered in depth. These are hurdles that people come across everyday; and Ringer shows from experince that he has been there! The tortoise is ever present which adds humour to the book. I would put this book as a worthwhile read if you want to improve, it has depth and gives concrete ideas on how to deal with many situations in life that confront us all. What i find amazing is that Ringer seems to have such a wide appreciation and understanding of life for one individual his ideas cover such a spectrum of issues from many areas. I admire his honesty and leaves very little out unlike some self-development authors that if you are " positive" it will all work! out. Ringer shows that this is not always the case; the " Love Hurdle " is packed with genuine ideas that would equal Mars and venus. " Financial Hurdle " is one which will give many suggestions on how money can be handled! The other hurdles are also informative and give deep insights on many areas of life. The book has depth not in an academic way more in a practical, real life manner. Ringers tape programme " Living without limits " is one which can help you appreciate this book. He is a confident speaker and gives his ideas in a simple, logical, honest manner! I would rate him as one of the best motivational speakers/author of the last two decades equal to Robbins,Waitley,Tracy,Rohn. The title "Looking out for No 1" and "Winning through Intimidation" can be misleading however "Million Dollar Habits" and " Living without Limits" seem a stark contrast however it is essentialy the same information.! Imagine an audience hearing " He's written Winning t! hrough Intimadation and Looking out for No 1 " It would not go down to well! His ideas are outstanding, helpful, and can help anyone improve who wants to. I was surprised to know that this book was actually written in the seventies; however many of the ideas are still relevant today - it shows we have not changed much - I recommend this book to anyone who wants to improve not the title but the content.

@ the risk of showing my age, I read Winning... I clearly remember getting the hard cover the week Looking... came out. I laughed, I cried. That was decades ago.

I agree that he can sound a little harsh. Sometimes ya gotta use a 2x4 to get the mule's attention. He got mine as a young man. I was working on a article which had me thinking about the priciples Ringer laid out... Even with decades of time passed, I can still recall the scene where bankrupt he was driving the rented U Haul with all of what he had left and driving past the beach.

The theory of sameness and what are you offering that you cannot find in 999 other people hit a nerve. It gave me the courage to be me, and not what others wanted me to be. (Relates well to the slaps in the face for one in the sack another reviewer mentioned).

Honestly I didn't know the book was re-issued. I'm delighted I can have a link from Amazon to send readers of my article.

Tcat

A person's greatest power is his or her rational mind. This book very succinctly describes ways to achieve a rational existence in a Western society through gaining perspective, establishing goals, and carrying through. This is an enlightening, straightforward book, very much in the style of Plato or Aristotle. Ringer's fundamental tenet is essentially the same as Aristotle's concept of "the good life". Ringer may go another step closer towards describing just what the good life is, whereas Aristotle tended to describe the means by which to achieve and support it. Like Aristotle, Ringer is widely misunderstood. Look out though: you have about as much odds of getting an apology from Ringer as you do from Aristotle.

But it's a more modern work. Also, I haven't found any typographical errors, which I appreciate.