What are the long-term ramifications for adolescent girls who lose one of the most important relationships in their life? Every year an estimated one million teen girls experience the death of their fathers. Countless more lose their fathers to divorce, addiction, incarceration or abandonment. Many helpful resources exist for teen girls dealing with such a devastating loss, but until now there hasn't been an authoritative guide for adult women to turn to in understanding how their behaviors and relationships may be shaped by losing their father at such a pivotal developmental stage. With gentle expertise, Laraine Herring blends poignant personal stories, the latest information in developmental psychology, and interactive exercises for readers in this much-needed, healing guide. Readers of Lost Fathers will feel a sense of connection to other women who struggle with issues related to commitment, trust, intimacy, self-confidence, and independence.
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Editorial Reviews
From Publishers Weekly
The premise of this grief recovery manual is that adolescent girls suffer more than boys from the loss of a father, because females, still regarded culturally as less valuable than men, need to feel secure in the affection of a male figure. While not wholly convincing, Herring's volume argues further that from ages 12 to 21, when children begin separating from their parents, girls who lack a father can find this rite of passage more difficult or even impossible to accomplish. Herring, a creative writer (Monsoons) and certified grief recovery specialist, lost her own father to heart disease when she was 19, and she devotes a great deal of text (occasionally too much) to recounting her own experience, although she also cites some clinical research and other people's personal histories. Adopting the increasingly popular notion that "we are storytelling creatures," she suggests a variety of exercises in recording and examining one's "storyline" for those who, even many years later, haven't healed from bereavement or separation (with specific focuses on loss from parents' divorce, abandonment or incarceration) and are feeling its impact on their relationships. Herring's tone is sober but soothing, and her book may aid women having trouble resolving their grief. (Apr.)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.
About the Author
Laraine Herring is an author, playwright, editor, teacher, and certified grief-recovery specialist. She holds an MFA in creative writing and an MA in counseling psychology, and she has developed workshops that use writing as a tool for healing through grief and loss. She currently teaches creative writing at Phoenix Community College. Ms. Herring's father died when she was a teenager after a long illness
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More About the Author
Laraine Herring holds and MFA in creative writing and an MA in counseling psychology. She has developed numerous workshops that use writing as a tool for healing grief and loss. She is the author of Writing Begins with the Breath: Embodying Your Authentic Voice; Lost Fathers: How Women Can Heal From Adolescent Father Loss, the novel Ghost Swamp Blues (forthcoming summer 2010), and the short story collection Monsoons. Her book, The Writing Warrior: Discovering the Courage to Free Your True Voice, will be released August 10, 2010. Her short stories, poems, and essays have appeared in national and local publications. Her fiction has won the Barbara Deming Award for Women and her nonfiction work has been nominated for a Pushcart Prize. She currently teaches creative writing in Prescott, Arizona. Learn more about Laraine at www.laraineherring.com. She blogs at http://laraineherring.blogspot.com.
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
9 of 9 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
Laraine Herring has written a book on father loss that really applies to mother loss as well, but specifically the father. As a reader, I gained insight into parental loss, and with the addition of her own poetry there's a personal journey that takes us beyond sheer intellect (which is very evident in this book, well written, intelligent). I'm left with the feeling that Ms. Herring is a woman of heart and mind, and with this balance a healing takes place. It's the kind of book you want to mark up, bend the page, read the poetry out loud, share with a friend, a group. Read it more than once, enjoy the process of heart and mind.
6 of 6 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
I'm a writer, too, and have been working on dealing with the loss of my father in some way since he died some 20 (plus!) years ago. I've read a lot - pop psychology and other - on coping with loss, but never saw this before. I found it in a Georgetown bookstore and started flipping through it. An hour or so later I had almost finished a first read and was in line to buy it. It's among the most useful books I've ever read.
It helps a lot that Ms. herring is a fellow writer, pretty much exactly my age, lost her father at a similar point, with a sister of similar relative age.
With all due respect to the previous poster, this is NOT about mother loss. I've found no shortage of books there. It's very specifically about losing your father when you're female and not a child or an adult but somewhere between girl and woman. The specificity is what makes it a find for me.
It also had very concrete writing assignments and wonderful insights. Thank you Ms. Herring - this books has a specific and limited market but your talents have not gone unnoticed and I hope will be seen by others too! Write more!
It helps a lot that Ms. herring is a fellow writer, pretty much exactly my age, lost her father at a similar point, with a sister of similar relative age.
With all due respect to the previous poster, this is NOT about mother loss. I've found no shortage of books there. It's very specifically about losing your father when you're female and not a child or an adult but somewhere between girl and woman. The specificity is what makes it a find for me.
It also had very concrete writing assignments and wonderful insights. Thank you Ms. Herring - this books has a specific and limited market but your talents have not gone unnoticed and I hope will be seen by others too! Write more!
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
I feel the title of the book is misleading. Most of the book seems to concentrate on womens adolescent loss from fathers who have died, and not much on abandonment issues. Much of the book is the author's personal experience from her father's death. I would not recommend this book to women who have lost their father through abandonment/divorce. Yes, loss is loss, but there are different issues surrounding a father who leaves the family vs. the finality of death.
Inside This Book
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First Sentence:
I sleep in the arms of a ghost. Read the first page Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
Writing Your Storyline, United States, North Carolina, Carl Jung, Joseph Campbell, Therese Rando, William Worden New!
Concordance | Text Stats Browse Sample Pages:
Front Cover | Table of Contents | First Pages | Index | Back Cover | Surprise Me!
I sleep in the arms of a ghost. Read the first page Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
Writing Your Storyline, United States, North Carolina, Carl Jung, Joseph Campbell, Therese Rando, William Worden New!
Concordance | Text Stats Browse Sample Pages:
Front Cover | Table of Contents | First Pages | Index | Back Cover | Surprise Me!
Citations (learn more)
This book cites 17
books:
See all 17 books this book cites
- Treatment of Complicated Mourning by Therese A. Rando on page 126, Back Matter (1), and Back Matter (2)
- Living with Grief: Children, Adolescents, and Loss by Kenneth Doka in Back Matter (1), Back Matter (2), and Back Matter (3)
- The Hero with a Thousand Faces (Bollingen Series, No. 17) by Joseph Campbell on page 8, and Back Matter
- Grief Counseling and Grief Therapy: A Handbook for the Mental Health Practitioner, Third Edition by J. William Worden in Back Matter (1), and Back Matter (2)
- Mental Health (Oxford GP Library) by Tony Kendrick in Back Matter
See all 17 books this book cites
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