Customer Reviews

Love Busters: Protecting Your Marriage from Habits That Destroy Romantic Love

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4 star:		(1)
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1 star:		(1)

 

 

I bought this book years ago and have given it away ever since. The update version is even better and is IMHO one of the best marriage books out there. In fact you can not go wrong with any of Dr. Harley's books but a must to have are His Needs Her Needs and Love Busters. Dr. Harley gives principles for guiding a marriage into harmony and explains how to use these principles to feed or deprive love. He moves on to explain how to use the same principle to address and rectify almost every issue you'll ever face together by showing the most common injuries that hurt your mate. I've read hundreds of marriage books and this by far beats 99% of them.

A wonderful book, full of insight and guidance. It really helps you see both your partner's conduct, and your own, from a different perspective - one unencumbered by emotions and baggage. You begin to understand the reasons why we act and react the way we do, and why things bother us so much - for example, why we can easily disregard an offhanded remark from a colleague, but rip up our loved one for the same thing. Contains helpful strategies for identifying, and hopefully changing, patterns of behavior (habits) that subtract loving feelings. Highly recommended.

There is a proverb in Arabic which says: "After the month of honey is over, the month of onions start".
What does a married couple do in order to avoid such a sad prophecy? One of the advices that Willard F. Harley, Jr. offers in his book is that each person should place more importance on mutual enjoyment and less on tiresome commitments. Through numerous examples he explains the interactions between the two persons that cant trigger positive or negative behaviors.
The aim is to be able to keep the romance going. The lessons to learn are to focus on the value of compromise, deal with criticisms, manage one's temper, appreciate honesty, learn how to deal with financial conflicts and avoid annoying habits and manipulative and erratic behavior.
This is an instructive, wise and entertaining book.

Joyce Akesson, author of Love's Thrilling Dimensions and The Invitation

"If you want to be in love with each other, you should place far more importance on mutual enjoyment than on trying to follow through on commitments that cause one of you to suffer." ~ pg. 214

Staying married can at times be very difficult in our modern age. You may feel like throwing your hands up and taking the easier route: divorce. If divorce is however not a feasible option for you then "Love Busters" may have a lot to offer.

Willard F. Harley, Jr. explains the dynamics at work in the typical relationship. He explains how our internal "taker" or "giver" encourages a variety of positive and negative behaviors. Throughout the book he gives real-life examples from his own practice. These are very revealing and help to paint a portrait of a successful or unsuccessful relationship.

Some of the topics in this book include a serious discussion about radical honesty, a revealing look at annoying habits and an extremely helpful look at financial conflicts.

Whether you are constantly arguing with your partner or you are in a new relationship that you hope will be successful, this book has a lot of good advice. I would especially recommend this book to newlyweds who want to beat the odds and stay married. You can either learn everything in this book from personal experience (the hard way) or you can use the wisdom in this book to build a very strong relationship.

~The Rebecca Review

Keep the romance going - that's the secret of long-lasting marriages. Now in a newly revised and expanded edition, "Love Busters: Protecting Your Marriage from Habits That Destroy Romantic Love" is a guide to keeping the spark alive in marriages by avoiding certain habits that drive wedges in between people, and starve the love that brought them together in the first place. Focusing on important matters such as the value of compromise, dealing with criticisms, managing one's temper, and the severe threats of lies or erratic behavior, "Love Busters" is an ideal read for any married couple. "Love Busters: Protecting Your Marriage from Habits That Destroy Romantic Love" is highly recommended for community library relationship collections.

This book, really makes you think about love, and puts everything into perspective. It helps couples to realize that staying in love does take conscious effort. I plan on giving this book, and "His needs, Her needs" to every newlywed couple I know so that they don't "fall" out of love with each other. This book is totally worth the time it takes to read it!

We were at a crisis point in our marriage and I randomly picked this up at the library. It resonated so much with both of us that I bought a copy from Amazon to have to refer to in the future. We are also seeing a very expensive therapist but this book may be one of the best investments we'll ever make for our marriage.

The best book I've ever read about marriage, is just brilliant! He really knows in depth what a couple needs to mantain alive their relationships. It's a book full of wisdom!

I've done a great deal of reading on the subject of marriage for 25 years, and i think Willard Harley's materials are the most effective for getting to the heart of problems. I discovered his website after my first marriage ended because of infidelity. His information taught me everything about the anatomy of an affair, and how you can build a relationship that is affair-proof and keeps the love alive and growing. If couples use his practical principles, they will see marriage-saving results. Now, I know my second marriage would not have survived if we hadn't committed to living according to his teachings. We applied what we learned and solved terrible conflicts and learned to love each other in a mutually fulfilling way. Thank you, Dr. Harley.

this book is a must for married couples or men and women considering marriage. great book to go through with your spouse to strengthen your marriage.