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Love, Like Dim Sum: Real World Lessons Learned and Relearned in a Virtual World [Kindle Edition]

Lea Tesoro
4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (9 customer reviews)

Kindle Price: $2.99
 
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Book Description

Virtual reality worlds are emerging as the next standard in social network platforms, adding a surprisingly powerful dimension to online communications and relationships. That extra dimension is creating strong emotional bonds between strangers – often unexpectedly – every day, all over the real world.

Because virtual reality is still in its infancy, we are learning much, not only about the technology, but also about the unique social aspects of virtuality and the consequences that result from them.

In “Love, Like Dim Sum,” Lea Tesoro (known in Second Life as Opal Lei) shares the lessons and insights that she gained from her personal experiences and observations as a resident of Second Life – relationship lessons that apply to romantic affairs or platonic friendships, personal connections or business contacts, virtual world or real world.

Whether you are a virtual world "oldbie" or "newbie," even if you've never been inside a virtual world yet, and especially if your loved one spends time inside a virtual world, learn how virtual worlds are redefining relationships, identity, and even reality itself.

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

The digital avatar named Opal Lei is animated by the biological avatar named Lea Tesoro.

Opal has been a full-time resident of Second Life® since August 2006 and has tried pretty much everything under the virtual sun.  She turns human avatars into mermaids and mermen with her Mer Betta™ products and creates miscellaneous items under her Ms.O.Lei-ny™ brand.  She initiated fundraising strategies for the International Spaceflight Museum, avidly supported the Relay for Life in Second Life, and strutted her stuff on the virtual catwalk of MODA Fashion.

Lea's literary career started at age 8 with silly poems about little brown birds, which are now lost.  Her artistic career started in the sixth grade when she won an art contest which gave her the chance to attend a summer workshop to explore various visual arts media.  Her technical career started when she wrote her first "Hello, world" program in the Pascal language during the first term of her Computer Science undergrad degree.  She worked in the software industry for almost a decade and a half, including a nine-year stint at Microsoft.  Her business career started when she dropped everything and drove cross-country to get her MBA.  Her virtual career started when she learned how to fly.  Or perhaps, she learned how to fly when her virtual career started. Through Second Life, she found full expression of herself as an artist at heart, a techie by mind, and an entrepreneur in spirit.

Her shrink calls her a Renaissance woman; her friends call her insane.  "Love, Like Dim Sum" is her first book.

Product Details

  • File Size: 334 KB
  • Print Length: 264 pages
  • Publisher: VirtuaSapient / Eleanor R Tesoro (Lea Tesoro); 1 edition (May 4, 2012)
  • Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B0080CR5DA
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Lending: Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #926,165 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
By Niko
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
If you are already a resident of Second Life, then you might want to consider giving this a read. Be warned, however, that it is not a gripping tale nor informative work of nonfiction. It is essentially a commentary on Lea's experiences in SL, by way of her blog posts and InWorld conversations. Not that that is meant in disrespect in anyway, but just so you understand what you are getting. In short, if you are already addicted to SL (and you know who you are), then it's another book in your collection of books about SL. If you aren't, then add it to your wish list and go log into SL for a bit.

I've been in SL a bit longer than Lea (I was part of the June '06 brigade) and while I don't know her, from what I read we were in many of the same circles. Perhaps she even caught a show or two of mine at the Cafe. Based upon my own experiences, I believe she's done a good job of summarizing romance in SL and all its moving parts. At times her narrative reminded me of my own late night chat sessions about what is real and what is virtual. While she does a good job of explaining SL and its lingo, I think a reader not familiar with SL or a similar virtual world would find it a bit difficult to relate to, or keep interested. I found myself skimming pages from time to time, but I was interested enough in the subject matter to want to finish it.

Lea has some good observations, however. Her guide to "What to negotiate about" prior to an SL romance is, IMHO, spot on. As was her thoughts about time in a virtual world. And yes, her "dim sum" approach to virtual relationships is advice well worth learning from. While this is the only serious book about virtual relations, she certainly gives plenty of food for thought for those hungry for it.

Finally, a word about price.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars A glimpse of virtual relationships May 26, 2012
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
I enjoyed reading this book, especially the middle and second half of it. It got better as I kept reading. In this book, the author shares tips about virtual relationships, which sometimes apply also to real-life relationships. I personally don't use virtual world sites, so it is nice to be able to vicariously live through the experiences the author had. I could sense how much the author loves relationships. I liked at the beginning of the book the analogy of heart dust particles that her broken heart turned into, and each particle has a capacity to give love wholly. I also liked this sentence: "In fact, having multiple romantic partners increases your capacity to love, because none of them have to be perfect." On the other hand, I think the epilogue does a disservice to this book. After having read many nice chapters, I didn't like some of the words used at the end. In the epilogue as in the prologue, the author insists that the book may not appeal to everyone. I think it is really not necessary to mention this. Really, no book appeals to everyone anyway! I recommend this book if you want to have a glimpse of what happens in virtual worlds.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A Piece of her Soul May 16, 2012
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
Love, Like Dim Sum provides the reader insight into the mind of a strong woman. She isn't afraid to explore her options and inspires her audience in the process. The book has interdisciplinary concepts that are highly note worthy, not just for SLers but for gamers and humans in general. Opal reminds us to be open-minded about the experiences we learn through virtual worlds. She illustrates a very tangible depiction about what happens when you allow the person behind the avatar to shine through! very well written and realistic! thanks for sharing a piece of you with us, I admire you for that! ~ I hope everyone enjoys this as much as I did
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars An interesting viewpoint May 9, 2012
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
Virtual worlds seem to have their own rules about romance. Lea Tesoro shares her view of the rules in this fascinating little book. The gravel heart, each piece a complete heart of its own, is a fascinating metaphor. To give each person you meet your whole heart, even the ones you just encounter in passing... how might the world be better if we could all do this? To see people struggle to connect in this text-only world is also fascinating. Words themselves are 7-15% of the communication between people in real life. To see them take up 100% in a virtual world is an amazing thing. Good or bad? I don't know. But it certainly makes me think.
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5.0 out of 5 stars Like Dim Sum' on the recommendation of a friend July 3, 2014
By Lucien
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
I picked up 'Love, Like Dim Sum' on the recommendation of a friend. My friend should've told me I wouldn't be able to put the book down! I started at 11 at night and literally watched the sun rise as I was reading. But the book was well worth a lost night of sleep. The author has a clear, crisp writing style that makes for delightful, easy reading of complex human sexual interactions.

She doesn't hold back, but invites us into her bedroom to watch and learn as she experiences one particular virtual world of discovery, Second Life. Much has already been written of the creative and commercial aspects of Second Life, a 3-D computer environment rich with opportunities, but most authors shyly demure on discussing what really sets the virtual world apart, human relationships and how they adapt to life where almost anything is possible including the perfection of physical beauty and the anonymity of being able to change your identity overnight. Lest one think this is just about Second Life, it's not. Virtual reality, in whatever form, is the future here today. More and more, virtual reality will be how we interact and eventually become merely an extension of our existing lives in the same way the telephone is today. It will be one way we communicate, not just with words but with actions, sights, and sounds.

And wherever humans go, sex goes, but it does alter to fit the environment. 'Love, Like Dim Sum' gives us an appreciation of what is here already for some, and coming for the rest of us. I gave the book five stars for its well-written presentation, unblinking description of what is sexually possible, and yes, for the entertainment it offers.
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More About the Author

The digital avatar named Opal Lei is animated by the biological avatar named Lea Tesoro.

Opal has been a full-time resident of Second Life® since August 2006 and has tried pretty much everything under the virtual sun. She turns human avatars into mermaids and mermen with her Mer Betta™ products and creates miscellaneous items under her Ms.O.Lei-ny™ brand. She initiated fundraising strategies for the International Spaceflight Museum, avidly supported the Relay for Life in Second Life, and strutted her stuff on the virtual catwalk of MODA Fashion.

Lea's literary career started at age 8 with silly poems about little brown birds, which are now lost. Her artistic career started in the sixth grade when she won an art contest which gave her the chance to attend a summer workshop to explore various visual arts media. Her technical career started when she wrote her first "Hello, world" program in the Pascal language during the first term of her Computer Science undergrad degree. She worked in the software industry for almost a decade and a half, including a nine-year stint at Microsoft. Her business career started when she dropped everything and drove cross-country to get her MBA. Her virtual career started when she learned how to fly. Or perhaps, she learned how to fly when her virtual career started. Through Second Life, she found full expression of herself as an artist at heart, a techie by mind, and an entrepreneur in spirit.

Her shrink calls her a Renaissance woman; her friends call her insane. "Love, Like Dim Sum" is her first book.


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