Customer Reviews

Love in the Time of HIV: The Gay Man's Guide to Sex, Dating, and Relationships

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In a recent visit to a clinic for a vaccine study I managed to discuss the state of treatment with the last of the three most well-known experts in HIV and Aids here in Austin, TX. In appraising the situation he said one third of his patients were older gentlemen who had been living with HIV and Aids for over 20 years, and who had experienced bad side effects, resistance, and serious health issues. He said the other thrid were younger and on medications, who have limited side effects and who have great success with the medicines. He said the last third was newly diagnosed even younger men who currently show no viral load although testing as Positive for antibodies, and who are not yet on treatment...

This book would have been better if it addressed the second two thirds of the men my doctor mentioned - those living with HIV currently who do not fit the picture of devastation that the Right-dominated medical PR machine would rather talk about. This book seems to focus on only men for whom HIV and Aids is an extremely difficult health challenge, and I found myself wondering what era it was written in...? Though much of the intent and advice is great and very needed - it needs to be updated and brought into the current times.

OK. NO, DON'T LET THOSE INGRAINED TOENAILS IN YOUR BRAIN ABOUT HIV MAKE YOU CRAZY BEFORE YOU READ ON. Stop spluttering before you're told to.
This book was written by an HIV+ man. His interviewees are pretty astonishing. I read it because I wanted to know what an HIV+ man might think about dating. I was particularly interested because I was briefly dating an HIV+ man and wanted to try to figure out what might be some of HIS options, and he's got plenty. I found out more than I ever expected.
If you are just making assumptions about doom and hanging heads and truckfuls of Saran Wrap in all contrasting relationships, you SHOULD read at least Chapters 1 and 3. You may learn something--which is why we read books, huh?

Michael Mancilla and Lisa Troshinsky provide a thorough roadmap through the often rough and complicated terrain of finding romance and relationships in the face of HIV.

Mancilla, an HIV-positive psychotherapist, feels passionately about helping HIV-positive gay men find and embrace loving relationships.

The authors address this topic by using a variety of techniques to engage readers, including personal anecdotes, highlighted text boxes, practical tips, quizzes, and numerous references to additional resources.

"Love in the Time of HIV" describes a new era in the history of HIV, one where the authors say HIV-positive men have the luxury of worrying about how to date against the backdrop of HIV, instead of just coping with short-term survival.