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Love's Own Truths: Bonding and Balancing in Close Relationships
 
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Love's Own Truths: Bonding and Balancing in Close Relationships [Hardcover]

Bert Hellinger (Author)
4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (2 customer reviews)


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Book Description

January 2001
In the three short years since the publication in English of Love's Hidden Symmetry, Bert Hellinger has traveled light years toward an even greater understanding of the intricacies of relationship and resolution. Love's Own Truths represents another important milestone in the search. For readers, the book is a compass left at the side of the road. We can leave it there -- afraid that we may have to change course -- or we can pick it up to see where it directs us.

Hellinger describes Love's Own Truths as a fundamental statement of his approach. And for those who know him, clearly this was no small task. The approach -- practical, improbable, complex, and simple -- cannot be easily described. It must be "seen."

First, the verbatim transcripts of three powerful workshops allow access to the various ways in which fragments of the life force puzzle can break apart or come together over generations. Time and again, feelings of distress can be traced to disconnects in the family system and the deeply subconscious attempts of other parts of the system -- whether one or many family members -- to put things back in balance. Readers will discover many opportunities to unlock new perspectives in their own healing process as they stand alongside the workshop participants.

Second, explanations of the therapeutic linchpins that hold this approach together, even when all hell is breaking loose, help readers grasp what is happening, especially in the family constellations, when the healing movements are subtle or seemingly obscure. Pivotal are the discussions of the resumption and completion of previously interrupted movements by a young child toward the mother or father.

Third, Bert Hellinger describes in detail the "inner posture" that both gives meaning to and draws meaning from what he calls phenomenological psychotherapy. Given the chance, the congruence between the posture and the process gives power to the resolutions that are revealed so that they may be dependable and enduring.

The inclusion of several of Hellinger's teaching stories adds yet another dimension to the reading. We quickly realize that some points are made stronger when they are lifted out of the immediate context, which may be emotionally charged and distracting. A master storyteller, Hellinger's gentleness and humor come through very clearly. The closing interview -- or conversation between friends -- offers another opportunity to understand the work on a different level and to see the man behind it through a new lens. Here, after being the subject of so much debate, Hellinger has the chance to express his views in an open and intellectually generous forum.

At one point, in speaking about death, Hellinger says, " I respect and trust reality more than I trust our human illusions about it, and this may seem hard to some people. To me, it is humility and a very deep, basic trust in what actually is." Love's Own Truths: A compass to help guide us to "what actually is" across many dimensions -- because it's there that healing can begin.


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Editorial Reviews

Review

"I know of no other psychotherapist who, in one decade, has so positively impressed people." -- Helm Stierlin, M.D., Ph.D., Professor, Emeritus of Psychiatry, University of Heidelberg, Germany

About the Author

Bert Hellinger: One of Europe's most visible -- and controversial -- psychotherapists and authors, Bert Hellinger has also become a leading voice in the healing arts internationally. A former priest and missionary to the Zulu in South Africa for 16 years, as well as an educator, psychoanalyst, body therapist, group dynamic therapist, and family therapist, he brings vast and diverse experience to his work. Helping professionals everywhere have embraced the new possibilities that this innovative approach offers to their clients. The family constellations, which have become the hallmark of Hellinger's approach, as well as his observations about -- and insights into -- family entanglements and their resolution, have touched the lives of thousands throughout the world.

Product Details

  • Hardcover: 464 pages
  • Publisher: Zeig, Tucker & Theisen (January 2001)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1891944487
  • ISBN-13: 978-1891944482
  • Product Dimensions: 9.2 x 6.5 x 1.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.7 pounds
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (2 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #976,585 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

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Average Customer Review
4.5 out of 5 stars (2 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

16 of 17 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars Don't knock it till you've tried it, April 13, 2005
By 
Michael Lavocah (Norwich, England) - See all my reviews
This review is from: Love's Own Truths: Bonding and Balancing in Close Relationships (Hardcover)
Hellinger's premise is that families are self-regulating systems that automatically seek balance. In the post-war situation in which his work evolved the deaths of many beloved people were not fully acknowledged because people felt they had to get on with their lives. However, things which are excluded do not simply go away. They continue to exert an influence on the family's body-mind. Everything and everyone has to be included.

Unlike the reviewer "Trabzon" I have participated in family constellations several times and I have experienced the power of the work to change people's lives at first hand. If you are interested in the influence that families have on our lives then this is a book for you. I give it four stars only because you should begin with "Love's Hidden Symmetry", which is even better.
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4 of 5 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Another must read!, January 9, 2007
By 
This review is from: Love's Own Truths: Bonding and Balancing in Close Relationships (Hardcover)
Another must read for people interested in healing themselves or facilitating others. People who are ready to understand and have compassion for those who commit politically incorrect behaviors like incest or adultary, will find this book very helpful.
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