Loving Choices: An Experience in Growing Relationships, Revised Second Edition (Rebuilding Books) [Paperback]

Bruce Fisher (Author), Nina Hart (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: July 1, 2000 | ISBN-10: 1886230307 | ISBN-13: 978-1886230309 | Edition: 2

Ever wanted to be better at building or maintaining romantic attachments, friendships, or family connections? Here's help! Loving Choices offers a powerful model for communication with yourself and others. Packed with insights, examples, and self-help exercises to help you understand yourself better and develop healing and healthy relationships with the significant others in your life.

Editorial Reviews

Review

"...for those who want to understand the connections between our individual past and potential future. Loving Choices serves to heal." -- James Redfield, author of The Celestine Prophecy & The Secret of Shambhala

"...show[s]...that love for others begins within ourselves. ...guide[s] us through...process of releasing limiting behaviors and embracing inner strength..." --Salle Merrill Redfield, author of Creating a Life of Joy

From the Publisher

Books in the Rebuilding Books series "for divorce and beyond" are written for those considering divorce, going through divorce, or rebuilding their lives after divorce. Inspired by the work of renowned divorce therapist, Dr. Bruce Fisher, the Rebuilding Books offer expert information and practical self-help procedures. These straightforward, life-affirming resources can help make the divorce process easier, healthier, and less painful, leading to more-fulfilled lives and stronger "second-time" relationships.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 256 pages
• Publisher: Impact Publishers, Inc.; 2 edition (July 1, 2000)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1886230307
• ISBN-13: 978-1886230309
• Product Dimensions: 9.2 x 6.4 x 0.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (6 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #198,194 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Bruce Fisher, Ed.D. (1931-1998) developed the 'rebuilding' model of divorce recovery nearly 25 years ago. Founder and director of the Family Relations Learning Center (Boulder, Colorado), he personally trained thousands of individuals and therapists in this approach, enriching the lives of hundreds of thousands worldwide. Popular divorce therapist, author, teacher, clinical member of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

33 of 34 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars such a wonderful book!, August 14, 2000

By A Customer

This review is from: Loving Choices: An Experience in Growing Relationships, Revised Second Edition (Rebuilding Books) (Paperback)

Out of all of the books which talk about different relationship issues, this is the only one that I have found which helps people to realize their contributions to all relationships in their lives, whether they be marital relationships or friendships or even business relationships. There are tools for communicating very well with yourself and others, so that one truly has a feeling for where one stands within a variety of situations. I have used their "self encounter" technique many times, and have found out some amazing things as a result. I now communicate much more effectively with my partner, and can say happily that we have very few misunderstandings from applying the ideas which I have learned from this book. I have wholeheartedly recommended this book to many friends, and feel that anyone who applies the ideas outlined here will be much happier in their interpersonal dealings.

20 of 20 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Loving Choices: An Experience in Growing Relationships, October 27, 2002

By 

Cassandra Barnes "Cassandra" (California) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Loving Choices: An Experience in Growing Relationships, Revised Second Edition (Rebuilding Books) (Paperback)

In Loving Choices: An Experience in Growing Relationships, Dr. Bruce Fisher and Nina Hart start with the premise that your relationship with yourself is the foundation of all your other relationships. Accordingly, the first section of their latest book is devoted to "the process of bringing your heart and your head into balance to make loving choices."

This involves recognizing and accepting your feelings. They provide extensive guidance and examples for doing their "self-encounter" exercise. Self encounters provide a way to communicate honestly and skillfully with yourself. Fisher and Hart emphasize the importance of this, saying that "you cannot effectively communicate with another until you are clear about what's going on inside yourself and what it is you are trying to communicate."

Once people learn to communicate with themselves, they are ready for the "Healing Encounter," where they practice communicating with others. Many conflicts with others are rooted in power struggles. Fisher and Hart describe how people can recognize and defuse the internal conflicts leading to power struggles. They also explain the importance of internal and external boundaries in relationships and offer guidance on forming appropriate boundaries.

The authors say that "we tend to create relationships like the ones we observed in childhood, yet most of us don't want that kind of relationship." They explain how to determine the extent to which you're influenced by your early observations and experience, and how you can use that information to build the kind of relationship that your truly want now.

Relationships are meant to be teachers and to assist in our personal growth. That growth is built on three skills: communication, awareness, and commitment. Loving Choices teaches readers how to develop those skills and build happy and healthy relationships that contribute to the well-being of all those involved.

7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Loving Choices: An Experience in Growing Relationships, October 27, 2002

By 

Cassandra Barnes "Cassandra" (California) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Loving Choices: An Experience in Growing Relationships, Revised Second Edition (Rebuilding Books) (Paperback)

In Loving Choices: An Experience in Growing Relationships, Dr. Bruce Fisher and Nina Hart start with the premise that your relationship with yourself is the foundation of all your other relationships. Accordingly, the first section of their latest book is devoted to "the process of bringing your heart and your head into balance to make loving choices."

This involves recognizing and accepting your feelings. They provide extensive guidance and examples for doing their "self-encounter" exercise. Self encounters provide a way to communicate honestly and skillfully with yourself. Fisher and Hart emphasize the importance of this, saying that "you cannot effectively communicate with another until you are clear about what's going on inside yourself and what it is you are trying to communicate."

Once people learn to communicate with themselves, they are ready for the "Healing Encounter," where they practice communicating with others. Many conflicts with others are rooted in power struggles. Fisher and Hart describe how people can recognize and defuse the internal conflicts leading to power struggles. They also explain the importance of internal and external boundaries in relationships and offer guidance on forming appropriate boundaries.

The authors say that "we tend to create relationships like the ones we observed in childhood, yet most of us don't want that kind of relationship." They explain how to determine the extent to which you're influenced by your early observations and experience, and how you can use that information to build the kind of relationship that your truly want now.

Relationships are meant to be teachers and to assist in our personal growth. That growth is built on three skills: communication, awareness, and commitment. Loving Choices teaches readers how to develop those skills and build happy and healthy relationships that contribute to the well-being of all those involved.