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Loving Mr. Spock: Asperger's Syndrome and How to Make Your Relationship Work Paperback – April 29, 2004

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Editorial Reviews


"'A searingly honest account of the difficulties faced when people who are differently wired come together.' - David Potter, National Autistic Society 'It is a must for all those with an autism spectrum disorder in their midst.' - Christopher Gillberg, Adviser to the World Health Organization" --This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

About the Author

Barbara Jacobs is a psychologist, agony aunt, broadcaster and lecturer in creative writing. She is the author of eight novels for young adults, including the award-winning Stick. As one of the most respected advice columnists in the UK she has written regular columns for Girl, Now, Good Health and LivingTV's website. She has had her own radio phone-in show on Heart FM and is a frequent guest and contributor to many radio and television programmes, including The Time...The Place, Esther and Food for Thought. Barbara lives in Leicester and has a son, Luke. --This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 352 pages
  • Publisher: Penguin Books Ltd (April 29, 2004)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 014101184X
  • ISBN-13: 978-0141011844
  • Product Dimensions: 5.1 x 0.9 x 7.8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 7.8 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (1 customer review)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #6,112,477 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

2 of 4 people found the following review helpful By BeatleBangs1964 VINE VOICE on July 30, 2005
This is a brilliant work about being in an intimate relationship with a person who has Asperger's Syndrome (AS). AS is a neurobiological condition that affects sensory processing/integration and is on the autism spectrum. It also affects communication.

Many people on the a/A spectrum don't care for hugs and find them intrusive and just endure them to appease others. For many people with AS, hugs can be a sensory onslaught that can include an aversion for the feel of scratchy beards; perfume or body odor; the feel of the hugger's clothing and the feel of being enclosed in a seemingly "restrictive" fashion. Many children on the a/A spectrum dislike loud displays of affection. For neurotypical (NT) counterparts, the natural response when confronted with an adverse response to hugs is to draw the erroneous conclusion that people on the a/A spectrum are devoid of affection.

The book takes its title from the Beatle coiffed character Mr. Spock of "Star Trek" fame. The title character, Mr. Spock is clinical, analytical and seemingly devoid of emotion. Sadly, a misperception that people with AS lack emotion still exists. The term "Mr. Spock," when applied to persons on the a/A spectrum was humorous. People with AS often have a novel way of making assessments and that can be found in the following example. I knew a Beatle fan, a young boy with AS who said of Mr. Spock, "He has a Beatle haircut and so do I. He's like me because of that and because he can figure things out. I read that the guy who made Mr. Spock up likes the Beatles." I like his reasoning.

Since AS is a sensory condition, feeling is what underscores a/A (autism/Asperger's) behavior and responses. Meeting the needs of all involved, the NT and the person on the a/A spectrum can be found in this book.
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