Top critical review
20 of 36 people found this helpful
Not in-depth by any means.
on May 9, 2010
I knew this book would be interesting the moment I saw it. I also knew I would ultimately have problems with it. I am a woman, if you find that colors my review. And yes, I did find many parts of the book sexist, if you were wondering. But, my main problem with the book was not so much the concept of the book but that I felt the book did not really do what it set out to do. There is a quick, inadequate chapter in the front of the book in which the authors run through the idea of maintenance sex. There's really no deep explanation of how maintenance sex is the solution to unbalanced sex drives, except that maybe your man will feel loved and appreciated afterward. The authors are basically suggesting when he wants to have sex more than you, you should have sex with him regardless of your desire, because he will feel so loved afterward, and your relationship can bounce back on track.
Unfortunately, this isn't realistic. If the woman is forced to equate sex with a chore, intercourse is not going to be a bonding, relationship-repairing experience unless both people can be receptive. It has been mentioned that these "lube job" techniques would make a man the happiest man alive; since they are designed specifically for male pleasure, that would make sense. But none of these "lube jobs" are really any different from a normal sexual encounter except in the fact that any consideration of female sexual needs are discarded, since it would be assumed that the female isn't sexually receptive, even if she's having sex.
I don't think I could really recommend this book for anyone having these types of intimacy issues. The book is too superficial and oversimplified for a couple with genuine problems having their individual needs met. This book would probably be best enjoyed between a couple who has a healthy sexual and emotional relationship and gets a good thrill out of light, Cosmo-style bubblegum sex books and can take this with a grain of salt (especially the stuff about preventing cheating, which I do not agree with at all and find downright sinister).