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Lying (Kindle Single)
 
 

Lying (Kindle Single) [Kindle Edition]

Sam Harris , Annaka Harris
4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (151 customer reviews)

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Amazon.com Review

Albeit with tongue in cheek, Mark Twain once wrote: "No fact is more firmly established than that lying is a necessity of our circumstance--the deduction that it is then a Virtue goes without saying." Well, Sam Harris begs to differ. And differ he does, with an impassioned, straight-shooting argument not only that lies are "the social equivalent of toxic waste," but also that each of us is capable of, and would benefit from, a life led free of the lie. Harris takes his time defining and stratifying types of lies--from adultery to government cover-ups to the seemingly innocuous little white lie--but insists that at any scale, a lie "condenses a lack of trust and trustworthiness into a single act." Worse, the gravest danger is the liar's inability to contain its effects; when we gamble on deception, we can't anticipate how far the lie will spread, and thus we limit the informed decision-making of who knows how many others. Conversely, Harris argues, even if we're motivated only selfishly, lying less frees us to trust others more. And that's the truth. --Jason Kirk

Product Description

As it was in Anna Karenina, Madame Bovary, and Othello, so it is in life. Most forms of private vice and public evil are kindled and sustained by lies. Acts of adultery and other personal betrayals, financial fraud, government corruption—even murder and genocide—generally require an additional moral defect: a willingness to lie.

In Lying, bestselling author and neuroscientist Sam Harris argues that we can radically simplify our lives and improve society by merely telling the truth in situations where others often lie. He focuses on “white” lies—those lies we tell for the purpose of sparing people discomfort—for these are the lies that most often tempt us. And they tend to be the only lies that good people tell while imagining that they are being good in the process.


This essay is quite brilliant. (I was hoping it would be, so I wouldn't have to lie.) I honestly loved it from beginning to end. LYING is the most thought-provoking read of the year.

Ricky Gervais

Humans have evolved to lie well, and no doubt you've seen the social lubrication at work. In many cases, we might not think of it as a true "lie": perhaps a "white lie" once in a blue moon, the omission of a sensitive detail here and there, false encouragement of others when we see no benefit in dashing someone's hopes, and the list goes on. In LYING, Sam Harris demonstrates how to benefit from being brutally--but pragmatically--honest. It's a compelling little book with a big impact.

Tim Ferriss, angel investor and author of the #1 New York Times bestsellers, The 4-Hour Body and The 4-Hour Workweek

In this brief but illuminating work, Sam Harris applies his characteristically calm and sensible logic to a subject that affects us all--the human capacity to lie. And by the book's end, Harris compels you to lead a better life because the benefits of telling the truth far outweigh the cost of lies--to yourself, to others, and to society.

Neil deGrasse Tyson, Astrophysicist, American Museum of Natural History

Product Details

  • Format: Kindle Edition
  • File Size: 145 KB
  • Sold by: Amazon Digital Services
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B005N0KL5G
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • Lending: Enabled
  • Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (151 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #588 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

151 Reviews
5 star:
 (82)
4 star:
 (42)
3 star:
 (12)
2 star:
 (5)
1 star:
 (10)
 
 
 
 
 
Average Customer Review
4.2 out of 5 stars (151 customer reviews)
 
 
 
 
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145 of 158 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Thoughts on Lying, September 19, 2011
This review is from: Lying (Kindle Single) (Kindle Edition)
Note - returned to edit this review a bit upon further consideration!

In regard to the length of the book - for goodness sakes, can I tell you how many apps I've bought for twenty bucks that do exactly nothing? Yes, it's short, but it cost less than two dollars, so no complaining!

I'm giving five stars because I thought this book was interesting, thought provoking, and worth reading. I actually didn't entirely agree with the content. I give Sam Harris major points for his chutzpah, though. Be it religion or lying, he has no difficulty taking concepts that are culturally universal and stating with certainly he's sure we'd all be better off without them. Where on earth he gets that certainty without some sort of computerized Hypothetical World Simulator is beyond me, but he's nothing if not bold.

So here are my thoughts on Sam's thoughts. I can't say his stance on lying (basically, don't do it, almost ever, including white lies,) is right or wrong. It's his stance, representative of his mind, values, and way of interacting with the world. I think that's valuable - for him, and as a small piece of the larger world. And interesting to read about, for me.

Sam says, essentially, that truth is kind of the be-all-end-all, in almost any situation. In the case of a white lie, for example, you are depriving someone of honest feedback, and maybe betraying their trust if they eventually observe that you are a teller of small lies.

So here's where I'll edit a bit. I think there are at least two (probably many more, but at least two,) narratives of "truth" that we are responsible for tracking in a communication: the literal truth of the words that we hear, and the more abstract truth of emotions, sub-context, and unspoken messages (otherwise known as the root of many "Women are impossible to understand!" jokes). To highlight, a couple of examples below:

Someone gives you a hideous gift and asks "Do you like it?" The literal question is, of course, do you like it? The social sub-context is most likely: I care about you. I was thinking of you, enough that I made the effort to pick out and purchase something with you in mind while busy attending to other things. I'm presenting you with this proof of my caring. How are you going to respond?

Someone says "How ya doing today?" The literal question is: how are you doing? The social sub-context is: This is an absolute formality and script, where the clearly established expectation (known to both of us) is that you'll say "fine". If you're having some sort of life crisis, well, you'll either bring that up later or you won't, depending on how well you know me. If I'm a cashier and you respond "Terrible, my wife just left me!" or "I'd rather not say" I'm going to be very surprised at the least.

Your friend gives a terrible speech and is berating herself afterwards. She asks "Was I really that bad?" Literal: Was I really that bad? Sub-context: I feel like crap. I know I was bad, so don't bother talking me out of it, but convince me it's not that big of a deal or as bad as I think. That's what I need right now to feel ok again.

Sub-context is slippery and difficult because we're always guessing at it, and it's easy to get lulled into pacifying other people if we ONLY attend to emotional and social sub-context. It's easy to reach a point where communication becomes so much about meeting another person's emotional needs that the literal context gets distorted. I see it as more of a continuum where we continually look for the right balance depending on the situation, though, vs. swinging entirely towards one end or the other. Ideally, we address both. Of course, this applies mostly to "white" lies vs. other types of lies.

Interestingly, this highlights for me why the New Atheists have difficulties in being labeled strident and rude, even though the content of what they say is typically quite polite. Just my opinion here, but they seem to forgo a lot of the social "buffers" we use for the sake of maintaining another person's emotional state. This may sound like some wacky new age concept, but subconsciously, this is something we all do to some degree during communication. Be it tiny adjustments to facial expression, body language, rephrasing, etc., typically we constantly monitor our communicative partner's state and adjust accordingly. This doesn't have to equate to lying, of course, but often it equates to "buffer" statements. "I can see you have good intentions here, but..." "While I admire X about you, I disagree that..." We do a lot of tiny repairs with the goal of staying co-regulated. I think scientists who are more intensely logical utilize these minor adjustments far less and rely more on literal truth.

Maybe it's irrational, but I think people who rely more on social and emotional thinking can actually feel betrayed or lied to in a sense when another person fails to observe this unspoken "agreement" in communication. I think for many people who are more sensitive or not super logical types, the unspoken deal is "You and I are entering a communication here. Within reason, I expect you to be careful with my feelings and I'll be careful with yours." When the deal is broken, I can see how people feel double-crossed - again, whether it's rational or not.

On a random side note, I love that Sam mentioned vaccines in this book. I've been hoping he'd bring this up forever, I'm glad the topic made a brief appearance here!
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42 of 46 people found the following review helpful:
4.0 out of 5 stars Terse but immensely effective..., September 19, 2011
By 
Artem Moshkovich (Lake Hopatcong, NJ) - See all my reviews
Amazon Verified Purchase(What's this?)
This review is from: Lying (Kindle Single) (Kindle Edition)
Having briefly glanced at the previous reviews for Sam Harris' long-form essay, "Lying", I felt the need to clarify a few points of error:

- One might argue that this piece pales in comparison to Sam's denser work but to do so is to draw a comparison between strikingly unlike works of literature: In "Lying", it would seem that Sam Harris seeks to make no revelatory claims about this common phenomenon in social culture but instead seeks to effectively outline how and why to combat the insidious force laying dormant at the heart of our relationships.

- To call Harris a huckster or charlatan for charging a mere $2 for this eBook is to overlook one obvious point: We've all purchased the item of our own volition. Not coincidentally, neither Harris nor his editors deceived about the contents of the book. It may be brief in form and function but it is...

- Effective and necessary. In theory, the necessity to avoid fatuous white lies and instead supplant them with integrity and honesty may seem so self-evident that one need not read about them from scholarly sources. Yet in practice and principle, deceit is so engrained in social culture that many view it as unavoidable. Sam Harris, in a mere 26 pages, inexorably highlights how and why we should view the practice of lying with utmost caution.

For what it's worth, I enjoyed the book and want to send out a congenial thanks to all those involved in its authorship.
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31 of 37 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars A tactful approach to an age old ethical issue, September 19, 2011
This review is from: Lying (Kindle Single) (Kindle Edition)
This short essay tackles a catastrophic and, and the same time, seemingly harmless issue. Lying. We've all done it. Some more than others. Most of us are oblivious to the far reaching implications of telling a lie, and Sam does a great job explaining the networking of falsehood, and how one little lie could exponentially lead to something devastating. I definitely recommend this read, especially since it's only 2 bucks!
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More About the Author

Sam Harris is the author of the New York Times bestsellers, The End of Faith, Letter to a Christian Nation, and The Moral Landscape. The End of Faith won the 2005 PEN Award for Nonfiction.

Mr. Harris' writing has been published in over fifteen languages. He and his work have been discussed in Newsweek, TIME, The New York Times, Scientific American, Nature, Rolling Stone, and many other journals. His writing has appeared in Newsweek, The New York Times, The Los Angeles Times, The Economist, The Times (London), The Boston Globe, The Atlantic, The Annals of Neurology, and elsewhere.

Mr. Harris is a Co-Founder and CEO of Project Reason, a nonprofit foundation devoted to spreading scientific knowledge and secular values in society. He received a degree in philosophy from Stanford University and a Ph.D. in neuroscience from UCLA.

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To lie is to intentionally mislead others when they expect honest communication. &quote;
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False encouragement is a kind of theft: it steals time, energy, and motivation a person could put toward some other purpose. &quote;
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The intent to communicate honestly is the measure of truthfulness. &quote;
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