Customer Reviews

Mad House: Growing Up in the Shadow of Mentally Ill Siblings

5 star:		(7)
4 star:		(5)
3 star:		(0)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

Having "acquired" through marriage two family members with bipolar disorder, I have sought to educate myself about mental illness and its effect on the family. I found "Mad House" to be a perceptive and instructive look at the secondary victims of mental illness: siblings of the patient. The author's personal experiences as the sister of two schizophrenics is interwoven with explanations of current scientific research about serious mental illness as well as psychotherapeutic insights about how the experience of growing up with a mentally ill sibling can affect others in the household. The memoir-ish portions of the book bring comfort in the form of knowing one is not the only person to have so suffered (and mental illness is one of the last great bastions of shame, secrecy and guilt left in our culture). The summaries of recent research are great educational tools. And if you are struggling with personal issues arising out of your experience as a sibling of a mentally ill person, then the matter-of-fact explanations of common behavioral and emotional patterns will give you insight -- self-help without the twelve steps or touchy-feely-wallowing-in-my-angst element that can be off-putting. Be advised that the book focuses on the special issues that siblings of the mentally ill face (as opposed to parents, or children, or spouses, for example) and the discussion does center on schizophrenia and related disorders, with only a passing nod to bipolar disorder, depression and other illnesses. But this skillfully written book contains plenty of empathy and perception for anyone interested in the mental health field.

My brother is schizophrenic and for many years while the family focus has been on his illness, I have felt at varying times sorrow, anger, grief, but above all loneliness. It is gratifying to find an author who gives words to these feelings. Clea Simon in _Mad House_ has done a masterful job of holding the mirror to the families who deal with the tragedy of mental illness. Her book tells the story of the brothers and sisters who sit in the quiet corners of home and watch unpredictable, uncontrollable and terrifying events unfold. I highly recommend this book to any brother, sister, or parent of a person who has been diagnosed as mentally ill. We can learn and grow from her experiences and by helping ourselves, we can help those in our care.

Clea is the luckiest of her siblings. Her older brother Daniel, a brilliant boy, showed signs of psychosis in early adulthood. He somehow managed to attend Harvard and upon leaving the renowned university, succumbs to his illness. He marries a woman from his halfway house and they have a daughter. The brother commits suicide and the baby remains unheard from. Clea was in college at the time of her brother's death and her parents curiously give her a false account of how her brother killed himself. That is never explained.

Clea's sister Katherine/Althea appears to be the most unstable. She, too, started showing signs of the illness in late adolescence and was barely able to fight her psychosis and finish high school. She lived from hospital to halfway house, never really finding her niche. Her erratic behavior precluded her from staying at halfway houses and in one memorable account in the book, a landlady requested that her parents come and collect her after she defecated on a mattress. She remained a "living" casualty of mental illness; at the close of the book, Clea did not even know where she was.

Clea is a strong voice, a strong advocate for the families of the mentally ill. Her poignant book is yet another reminder that mental illness is often a family illness because of the tragic impact it has on non-mentally ill members.

Hi Folks,
I just wanted to say thank you to all the readers who've read Mad House and either posted here or contacted me. So many of you are also siblings, and I am gratified that many of you have found your experiences reflected in my book. I've tried to show, through my experiences and the dozens of you interviewed, that while our story may be one of the quieter ones in our family, it is still valid and deserving of space. Strength and health to you all!
I've used the same combination of memoir and interviews (more than 70) in my new book, "Fatherless Women: How We Change After We Lose Our Dads" (Wiley). If any of you read that, please let me know what you think.
peace,
Clea

I did not grow up with schizophrenic siblings, although there is a history of the disease in my adopted family. What I did experience was two sisters with very disturbing behavior, and I found Mad House to be a great help in describing a lot what went on in my particular house and family.

Clea Simon does a terrific job portraying the stress and chaos mentally ill siblings can cause and the far-reaching effects this can have on well family members. In her case, she had a brother and sister with schizophrenia, and her sympathetic yet realistic depiction of life under such circumstances is fascinating, informative and clearly thoroughly researched. Her knowledge of the topic enables her to speak intelligently and cogently about very disturbing emotions, such as the overwhelming fear that she, too, would contract this dreaded disease.

Part of what is best about this book is that Simon speaks to a wide range of people who have also grown up or dealt with schizophrenic siblings, and the candid, personal and touching perspectives they provide complements Simon's own experience. It is truly fascinating how many of the 'healthy' siblings have found their way into the mental health profession, enabling them to 'help' their sick brothers and sisters in a variety of ways, however indirectly.

I highly recommend this book for anyone interested in family dynamics, mental illness or for anyone who grew up with someone who exhibited anti-social, destructive behavior. The wide array of response to such situations are well-documented and described, and it is quite a relief to find one's own experiences echoed in those of others. But there's a great deal here worthwhile for those simply interested in the topic, and in the heart-wrenching effects mental illness can have on those who care about and for those stricken with the disease.

My brothers aren't schizophrenic, like Ms. Simon's siblings. They are autistic, however, and the impact of their condition on our family dynamic was much the same. I am the only normal one of three children, and during my life I've felt rage, grief, loneliness, and the dreaded "I-wish-they-would-die-and-free-us-from-this-illness". Because of my brothers I have problems with intimacy and my single greatest fear is that I will bear a child with autism.

The guilt that accompanies my feelings is overwhelming. Ms. Simon's book showed me that I'm not alone, that my feelings aren't illegimate, and that a sort of emotional peace can be had when there's no cure (or even effective treatment) in sight. Thank you for writing this book--I needed it more than any other book I've ever read (and that includes my cherished Bible).

As a sister of a violent manic-depressive, I know the alienation, fear, violence, prejudice, guilt, and neglect that the normal siblings often encounter. There has always been plenty of literature available for the mentally ill and their parents, but a lack of material for the siblings. This book has actual accounts from siblings, and their stories are in particular very interesting. A complaint I have is that although the book cover and title suggest it's targetted at siblings of all mentally ill persons, it actually concentrates on schizophrenia which has some unique issues. The book may have lived up to its title and book cover better if there had been more representation from siblings of persons with other mental disorders. Another complaint I have is that the author suggests that the trend of returning the mentally ill from institutions to their family homes is a positive thing. Most siblings would disagree. Other than those complaints, I recommend this book.

When Clea Simon was growing up, her otherwise pleasant childhood was marred by odd outbursts and eccentric frightening behavior of her older brother and sister, both of whom would be diagnosed with schizophrenia. Simon, an intelligent and resourceful young girl turned to friends, books and fantasy games to distance herself from the chaos in her home. When she became an adolescent, her brother was hospitalized for mental illness, and she put pressure on herself to be the good, high-achieving child in the family. She was accepted into Harvard and on the outside looked like a wholly successful, confident person. However, years of suppressing her fears about her siblings began to take its toll, and she decided to enter therapy in order to find out who, apart from a high-achiever, she really was. Mad House is not just her story, however, but the many others' who she interviewed and whose accounts are smoothly woven into the book. It will almost certainly reassure readers with mentally ill siblings that they aren't alone.

As the parent of 3 children , one having a mental illness, I found this book to be very informative about sibling issues and the effects of an ill sibling on their family. I have a much better understanding of my other children's behavior and reactions as well as my own. While we all know how much any mental illnes affects a family, this chronicles a woman's life from young childhood to the present, in the midst of schizophrenic siblings. While both of Ms. Simon's siblings have the same diagnoses, their personailities and behaviors remain quite different to further complicate this young woman's life. I don't think many of us have any idea the profound life-long effect this can have on someone, until chronicled by Ms. Simon. I found this book to be honest, caring, and show that while growth can ultimately come out of situation as Ms. Simon's it will always have a underlying shadow on her life.

My brother is schizophrenic and for many years while the family focus has been on his illness, I have felt at varying times sorrow, anger, grief, but above all loneliness. It is gratifying to find an author who gives words to these feelings. Clea Simon in _Mad House_ has done a masterful job of holding the mirror to the families who deal with the tragedy of mental illness. Her book tells the story of the brothers and sisters who sit in the quiet corners of home and watch unpredictable, uncontrollable and terrifying events unfold. I highly recommend this book to any brother, sister, or parent of a person who has been diagnosed as mentally ill. We can learn and grow from her experiences and by helping ourselves, we can help those in our care.