Magical Thinking: True Stories [Audiobook, CD, Unabridged] [Audio CD]

Augusten Burroughs (Author, Reader)

Book Description

Publication Date: October 5, 2004

From the number-one bestselling author of Running with Scissors and Dry comes Augusten Burroughs's most eagerly anticipated collection yet: true stories that give voice to the thoughts that we all have but dare not mention.

It begins with a Tang Instant-Breakfast Drink television commercial:

"Yes, you, Augusten. You were great. We want you." I can now trace my manic adult tendencies to this moment. It was the first time I felt deeply thrilled about something just a fraction of an instant after being completely crushed. I believe those three words "We want you" were enough to cause my brain to rewire itself, and from then on, I would require more than other people....- from Magical Thinking's "Commercial Break"

A contest of wills with a deranged cleaning lady. The execution of a rodent carried out with military precision and utter horror. Telemarketing revenge. A different kind of "roof work." Dating an undertaker who shows up in a minivan. This is the fabric of Augusten Burroughs's life: a collection of true stories that are universal in their appeal yet unabashedly intimate, stories that shine a flashlight into both dark and hilarious places. With Magical Thinking, Augusten Burroughs goes where other memoirists fear to tread.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

It’s best to know this from the start: Augusten Burroughs is mean. Augusten Burroughs is also outrageously X-rated. If you can get past those two things, Burroughs might just be the most refreshing voice in American books today, and his collection of acerbic essays will have you laughing out loud even while cringing in your seat. Whether he is stepping on the fingers of little children or giving you the blow-by-blow on a very unholy act, Burroughs manages to do it in a way that fills conflicted fans with both horror and glee.

Spanning from the surprisingly Machiavellian portrayal of his role in a Tang commercial at age seven to his more recent foray into dog ownership, Burroughs has what seems to be an endless supply of offbeat life experiences. Much like earlier David Sedaris collections (Barrel Fever or Naked), there are occasional fits and starts in the flow of the writing, but ultimately, Magical Thinking is worth reading (and re-reading). If you’re familiar with Burroughs's memoirs, Running with Scissors, and Dry, you may find parts of Magical Thinking repetitive, since these essays bounce around in time between the other two. In fact, in an ideal world, this collection would have come first, as it offers an excellent introduction to Burroughs's fascinating life. --Vicky Griffith --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Publishers Weekly

It would be tempting to call these highly personal and uninhibited essays painfully honest, except that Burroughs (Running with Scissors; Dry) is so forthright about his egocentricity that the revelations don't appear to cause him much pain. He approaches his material with a blithe tone that oozes sarcasm and crocodile tears. But the palpable humor of the writing itself endears listeners to him enough that they won't be completely repelled by even Burroughs's ugliest moments (which include his less than gallant reaction to accidentally stepping on a toddler's fingers in a store). His performance is off the cuff, but even when he's at his least humane, he still comes across as all too human. He adopts the same openness that made his previous memoirs—dealing with his bizarre upbringing and battle with addiction—so successful; now, however, he's focusing on less serious subject matter and displaying failings that are more vain. Burroughs excels in his personifications of others, whether portraying a domineering cleaning woman or an overbearing boss. While some may secretly wish for the death of such a boss, though, Burroughs admits openly and proudly that he believes he can will it to happen. That attitude, which is accentuated by his reading, makes this audiobook a true guilty pleasure.
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Product Details

• Audio CD
• Publisher: Macmillan Audio; Unabridged edition (October 5, 2004)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1593974213
• ISBN-13: 978-1593974213
• Product Dimensions: 5.8 x 5 x 1.1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 8 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (198 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,017,933 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Augusten Burroughs is the author of the autobiographical works "Running with Scissors," "Dry," "Magical Thinking," "Possible Side Effects" and "A Wolf at the Table," all of which were New York Times bestsellers. "Running with Scissors" remained on the New York Times bestseller list for over two consecutive years and was made into a Golden Globe-nominated film starring Annette Bening. His only novel, "Sellevision," is currently in development as a series for NBC. "Dry," Augusten's memoir of his alcoholism and recovery, is being developed by Showtime. In addition, Burroughs is currently creating an original prime-time series for CBS. Augusten's latest book is called "You Better Not Cry: Stories for Christmas."

Twice named to Entertainment Weekly's list of the funniest people in America, Augusten has also been the subject of a Vanity Fair cover story and a Jeopardy! answer. His books have made guest appearances in two James Patterson novels, one Linkin Park music video, numerous television shows and a porn movie.

Augusten has been a photographer since childhood and many of his images can be seen on his website, www.augusten.com. He lives in New York City.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

19 of 21 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Magically fascinating, despite the fact that he's happy in the countryside, December 14, 2005

By 

Jessica Lux (Rosamond, CA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Magical Thinking: True Stories (Hardcover)

Having adored the off-beat, self-destructive, endangered life Burroughs wrote about in Running with Scissors and Dry, I was eager to pick up his third memoir. While his path of destruction made for scintillating and darkly comic reading in his first two books, here he writes from a balanced and centered place. He lives in the countryside of Massachusetts with a long-time partner. This is the place in his life were he was finally able to reflect on his earlier experiences and write his first two masterpieces.

Some reviewers seem to think the edge is gone, but I couldn't disagree more. Burroughs is able to make even the mundane fascinating--dealing with a rat in his bathtub, having a neurotic dog who has only ever urinated on NY concrete and can't handle the wide open grassiness of the new home in Massachusetts, dealing with a psychotic cleaning lady, talking to telemarketers, and trying to get his boyfriend to switch moisturizers. Burroughs inhabits a fabulous Magical Thinking world (in which the person believes he exerts more influence over events than he actually has), and he sucks the reader right into the rich and larger-than-life world.

Now that he's stable, I'd love to read more of Burroughs commenting on the ordinary, making it magical.

55 of 68 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Magical, indeed, October 23, 2004

By 

popjunkie "popjunkie" (Atlanta, GA USA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Magical Thinking: True Stories (Hardcover)

"Magical Thinking", while autobiographical, is not a chronological memoir like "Running With Scissors" & "Dry." Instead, it is a collection of personal anecdotes in a sort of essay format, which makes for easy reading. Unlike his memoirs, which I found extremely difficult to put down, there are definite starts & stops. When a particular chapter is over, it's over. The next one begins anew. And there is the only criticism that I can level at this collection: had I not read his memoirs, I would have had a really, really difficult time figuring out exactly when the incidents occured. Was he drinking at the time? Was he working in advertising? Is this post-"Dry" or pre-"Dry"? They are all post-"Running With Scissors" (he is an adult), but that's the only thing that's clear. (And therein is probably the root of the issue some have with the "rat-thing": it isn't clear without background knowledge that he was in an altered state and would never perform such an act while sober. It was a symptom of the disease of alcoholism, not an indicator of morality or character. And there, I've spent too much time on the "rat-thing.") This collection is such enjoyable reading - I laughed out loud, a lot, and I also teared up as well. Equal parts comedy & drama, a perfect combination.

20 of 23 people found the following review helpful:

3.0 out of 5 stars not as good as his others, July 31, 2005

By 

Kendra - See all my reviews

Amazon Verified Purchase

This review is from: Magical Thinking: True Stories (Hardcover)

After finishing Dry, which I enjoyed immensely, I eagerly opened up this book. This one was a bit of a disappointment. Actually, I'm reluctant to criticize these stories, because what I really like about Augusten Burroughs is exactly what I didn't like in this particular book. I like his caustic wit. I like his honesty. I like his neurosis. I like that he sees the trees instead of the forest sometimes. However, some of these stories are just really boring. Some of them are funny. Some of them are less funny but have some really hysterical parts. Some of these are just like journal entries. . . and these are the stories I found to be a waste of time.

For instance, when Augusten writes of Dennis, he writes with such love and affection that, had there been an actual story to tell, I would have really enjoyed reading that. But, at least two-- maybe three stories-- were just about the author's intense love and affection for this man. That's okay and all, and I'm happy that the author has found happiness, yet it is a bit boring to read for the reader!

Additionally, there was one story where Burroughs steps on a baby's hand and moves away without explaining to the mother why the baby is crying. The mother thinks the baby wants a toy and scolds her instead of comforting her. Maybe this is funny to Burroughs-- who openly admits he's a bit of a cad and not too paternal-- but it's really cruel. And, although it might be funny if seen on Seinfeld, it's definitely not endearing and definitely doesn't arouse any empathy for the author from the reader. Neither does the cruel way he kills a mouse. Although the comments he makes after talking to a plumber WERE hilarious.

I wouldn't recommend this book, but I do recommend Running with Scissors and Dry. I am awaiting my copy of Selevision, as well. I haven't given up on reading any other books he comes out with.