Customer Reviews

Mail-Order Brides: Women for Sale

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about 10 years ago, and she was fascinating. Contrary to what other reviewers have erroneously presumed, she did not come across as a man-bashing feminist. She is not American born and raised, but raised and schooled IN THE PHILLIPINES, and therefore does not have the perspective that these folks would like to attribute to her. Ms. Glodava has spent much of her life working for human rights and Phillipine assistance agencies, and at least some of those have been/are church-based. She is a spiritual person, who does her best to make a difference for vulnerable people. She doesn't have an anti-American or anti-male agenda, but she has dealt with enough "mail order" (it's a euphemism, guys, come on! Oh, wait - it has more than two syllables, I guess it wouldn't be in your vocabularies.) brides from the Phillipines and other parts of the world to have a good idea what their lives are like. Another acquaintance of mine, a happily married "mail order bride" would concur with Ms.Glodava's findings - she estimated that 95% of women in those situations are unrealistic in their expectations of life with a US man in the US, and are very unhappy with the reality, with many of them ending up abused. The very nature of "shopping" long distance for a woman because of stereotypes of passivity, traditional femininity and submission tends to attract certain kinds of men, and this is borne out by other reviews, including those who would slam this book (and who probably haven't read it).

This book presents a well-framed thesis regarding an all-too-often overlooked epidemic in this, and in several western European nations. The mail-order bride industry preys on women who, because of a dire economic and social situation, falsely believe that there is simply no other way to escape their reality. An artificial shroud of legitimacy (read: marriage) masks the exploitative nature of the mail-order bride business. So often these marriages end in, at the least, abuse, and, at the worst, the murder of the victim -- the woman who has been PURCHASED. Many write that existing laws can be used to combat this industry's practices. If lawmakers and academics alike focus on what this industry essentially does, markets human lives, then existing laws against prostitution and involuntary servitude may hold some promise. And, as for the moderately literate individual who wrote the review prior to my own, I would applaud the fact that he has chosen to purchase a book, and managed to ascertain that it was, in fact, authored by a feminist. However, the fact that he has either purchased his "wife", or advocates the practice of doing so, illustrates the scope of the problem. He seems, from his ill-worded review, to be rather frightened by what he terms American Ladies. Perhaps the fact that the women are no longer regarded as the property of men that has lead him to support the trafficking of women. I have just two wishes for this person. The first is that the woman that he purchased is larger and stronger than he. The second -- that he is infertile. I digress. This is an excellent read and I would recommend it to anyone with an interest in feminist legal theory or human rights. And, quite frankly, to any person who does not find the fact that it is legal to purchase another human being offensive, please read this book as well, with an open mind, if that is possible. Perhaps there exists some hope for your enlightenment.

If done judiciously international, internet dating could hardly be thought of as "trafficking" of women. One-sided accounts such as this do not accurately portray the motivations of the serious-minded men and women that meet using these services. Now, of course there are risks involved, as there are in any form of dating, that is why it is important to carefully consider both the risks and rewards of such a venture before acting. Those of you that would like to know more should consult the website.

While the stories in this book may not reflect all marriages of this sort, there is evidence to support that the men who use these services have some emotional problems. One need only to read the review by the man in Fernley NV (July 2001) to see how he himself, while attempting to refute the research in this book, provides supporting evidence for the book. His statements reflect his discomfort with women who expect to be treated as equals, not servants. While he makes good use of euphemisms (gentle souls) his statements drip of insecurity, and a need to dominate. While freedom to do what we choose is a cornerstone of U.S. greatness, there is nothing wrong with calling a spade a spade, as this book does. When our desires result in abuse and human right violations, it is necessary to examine what rights are most vital. This book demonstrates the need to protect women who could be potentially victimized by allowing them to flee an abusive situation with impunity. Greater freedom for these brides however would strike fear into the hearts of those who use these services for the wrong reasons. While the practice should not be outlawed, protections need to be in place. Lessening the potential for abuse would make the practice more palatable, though perhaps not to some of the men looking for a green light to abuse.

I have a real problem with anyone... feminist or otherwise who would tell me I can not seek my life partner abroad. If a lady becomes my wife it is because we arrived at that decision mutually... out of respect and admiration for each other. I never looked at this (nor has my fiance) as a transaction. It is an insult to not only the men who prefer these gentle souls as life partners, but the loving gracious ladies themselves. The real problem the author has is that American men... maybe even one who used to be her man... made a life choice to stop playing around with the venomous crazy western women who have been so disappointing to many of us, in search for something pure and decent. She is upset because we've found what we were looking for. Lady... if you really want to find peace with this issue, study the difference between yourself and the women of the Philippines... then maybe with a little self directed therapy, you could be as useful to a relationship as they are... who knows, you may even find a man.

I have a real problem with anyone... feminist or otherwise who would tell me I can not seek my life partner abroad. If a lady becomes my wife it is because we arrived at that decision mutually... out of respect and admiration for each other. I never looked at this (nor has my fiance) as a transaction. It is an insult to not only the men who prefer these gentle souls as life partners, but the loving gracious ladies themselves. The real problem the author has is that American men... maybe even one who used to be her man... made a life choice to stop playing around with the venomous crazy western women who have been so disappointing to many of us, in search for something pure and decent. She is upset because we've found what we were looking for. Lady... if you really want to find peace with this issue, study the difference between yourself and the women of the Philippines... then maybe with a little self directed therapy, you could be as useful to a relationship as they are... who knows, you may even find a man.

Anyone who has any degree of intelligence will understand that you cannot purchase a woman from a "catalog". How is it possible??? You purchase a woman from a "catalog", then the company will ship her to you by UPS and if she is not submissive enough, then you return her to the company for a full refund??? Come on, use your brians and think about it! How is it possible???

There is no such thing as buying a woman from a catalog. "Mail-Order Brides" is a term irresponsibly used by biased critics and media with the intentions to degrade the men and women who use the services to correspond with each other, and to degrade the companies who offer such services.

Read this book like a science fiction!