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Make Up, Don't Break Up: Finding and Keeping Love for Singles and Couples
 
 
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Make Up, Don't Break Up: Finding and Keeping Love for Singles and Couples [Paperback]

Bonnie Eaker Weil (Author), Harville Hendrix (Author)
4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (17 customer reviews)


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Paperback $11.53  
Paperback, September 2000 --  
There is a newer edition of this item:
Make Up, Don't Break Up: Finding and Keeping Love for Singles and Couples Make Up, Don't Break Up: Finding and Keeping Love for Singles and Couples 4.2 out of 5 stars (17)
$11.53
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Book Description

September 2000
In Make Up, Don't Break Up, Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil reveals the real reason so many relationships fail, and shows how to side-step the traps and pitfalls that stop relationships (including marriages) before they start.

She also offers invaluable advice on how to "wake up" to how you really feel about your relationship, "shake up" one that has become stale or boring, and "break up" to test a relationship's staying power.

Her approach turns the conventional wisdom on finding and sustaining love upside down:
-- Men and women are more alike than different in their needs for love and intimacy
-- Women should make the first move most of the time
-- Communication isn't everything -- you can talk a relationship to death!



Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil is one of America's best-known relationship experts. She has appeared on the Today show, The Oprah Winfrey Show, The View, and Good Morning America. Dr. Bonnie's work has been featured in USA Today, Cosmopolitan, Redbook, and the New York Times. --This text refers to an alternate Paperback edition.

Product Details

  • Paperback: 448 pages
  • Publisher: Adams Media (September 2000)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1580624073
  • ISBN-13: 978-1580624077
  • Product Dimensions: 6.8 x 4 x 1.2 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 11.8 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (17 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #878,474 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
30 of 30 people found the following review helpful
Don't miss this one! March 6, 2005
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
I really liked this book, it seems to be lower on fluff, and higher on substance. This book will help you figure out your style and your personal needs in a relationship. She is also great at assessing your partner's needs and relationship style. This book gives sound advice, while lifting up your spirits.

Often the person that we have a great amount of internal conflict with is the exact person that can help heal wounds from childhood. Unfortunately, we come with different styles, and sometimes we need to adapt for the person that is having the harder time to commit.

She gives clear advice, and ideas on how you can best adapt to your partner without sacrificing your self respect, and dignity. Will this book work for me? It already has in helping me to reframe a past relationship, and hopefully in future ones, I can bypass some of those stumblings I have made in the past. I definate must if you think you should break up, or have broken up and want to get back together. Honestly, its just a great read to learn more about yourself.
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21 of 22 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
If you think, "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" is good, then this book is the ultimate. If you'll follow her techniques word for word, you will definitely get results. Every mother should give her daughter this book for sound advice on getting and keeping the love you want. It explains beautifully, how the anatomy of a relationship is like dancing the tango in the sense of connecting , disconnecting and reconnecting. The author employs very practical smart heart skills to apply to breathing life and love back into marriages that have lost their luster and courtships that are not moving in the direction of commitment. I promise that this book will be well worth it's investment many times over. Forget your therapist. This book is all you'll ever need.
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19 of 20 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback|Amazon Verified Purchase
Although I think this book would help many men too, I am writing this review for women. This book makes you understand why "The Rules" work. I highly recommend both, but if you read and follow this book you really don't need "The Rules". Basically it comes down to most men are "distancers" because they are afraid of commitment and women are "pursuers" because they want commitment and this book tells you when to call and when not to call and why men wait to and other things we endure in the dating process.

I don't think it helps to get someone back, but it's great for preventing break-ups. Great for single women or women in a new relationship.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
Eye opener/helpful book
I purchased this book in an effort to understand why I constantly pushed people away. I was dating a wonderful guy that was everything I ever wanted and just couldn't deal with... Read more
Published 1 month ago by Karen
Manipulative, but some helpful tips. There are better books out there.
I think you have to be really careful when you read this book. Its focus can be alot about trying to change the other person, but there are things you CAN use. Read more
Published 2 months ago by Love in My Own Skin
A must read, whether you're in a relationship or not.
This book really opened my eyes to a lot of concepts I was not really aware of in relationship and most importantly in communication. Read more
Published 4 months ago by Nick
Lots of confusing / contradictory theory & non-gender neutral writing...
I've only read it once so far but in my 1st read of the book I did find some interesting tidbits of info that I've highlighted in order to further study/reflect on. Read more
Published 6 months ago by HLB
calling all codependents
This book is awful. The premise that you can find a partner who is trainable is ridiculous. Compassionate manipulation should have been the title to this book. Read more
Published 16 months ago by Lori Tankersley
Very good reading for singles, too.
I got this on a whim. I didn't know what to expect, but found the advice really good to hear. The authors really know about relationships and, it seems, finding one isn't the... Read more
Published on March 25, 2010 by Jess
A must have for everyone in a relationship
This is by far the best book I have ever read about relationships.
And it has the most incredible solid advice for how to make a relationship work. Read more
Published on June 19, 2008 by L. Holtz
better than most...
Besides outright contradictions, this book is pretty helpful. For instance, "break up with your lover, but don't have any contact, but it's OK to sleep with them. Read more
Published on October 12, 2007 by orangeyellowdog
Best Self Help Book Ever
The information in this book is outstanding whether you are single, in a relationship or married. I wish I had read this long ago, it would have saved me a lot of heart ache. Read more
Published on June 26, 2007 by Happy Clam
OK book for woman
I read this book thinking "this book is written by a woman from a woman point of view"....if you are a woman, read this book, and it may be helpful. Read more
Published on December 12, 2006 by Tradeand5
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Inside This Book (learn more)
First Sentence:
People who are married or in committed relationships are healthier, wealthier, and happier. Read the first page
Key Phrases - Statistically Improbable Phrases (SIPs): (learn more)
relationship debris, attachment skills, abandonment wounds, reactive distancing, physiological discomfort, real life love, relationship script, betrayed partner, forgivable sin, elusive man, relationship dance, third date, childhood wounds, fair fighting, fighting fair
Key Phrases - Capitalized Phrases (CAPs): (learn more)
Smart Heart Dialogue, Connection Guardian, Euphoria Stage, Vanishing Man, Bachelor Number, Power Struggle Stage, John Gottman, John Wayne, Fourth of July, Frightening Messages, Oedipal Stage, Re-Romanticizing Stage, Child Perceives, New York Magazine, Vanishing Men, Judy Garland, Nice Guy, Paul Pearsall, The Forgivable Sin
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