Customer Reviews

Making the Big Move: How to Transform Relocation Into a Creative Life Transition

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Thinking about a life change? I mean a really big one, in a word, relocation. Then "MAKING THE BIG MOVE" by Cathy Goodwin is the book for you. Don't leave home without it. Subtitled "How to Transform Relocation into a Creative Life Transition," this guide takes you step-by-step through the inner processes of relocation that impact your life. If you are looking for practical advice on how to pack or find suitable housing in a new area, look elsewhere. No, it is not another feng shui tome either.

Goodwin, a marketing professor, who has lived in over a dozen cities across North America, gets to the heart of the whole matter - those underlying fears that turn a life transition into a moving hell. Goodwin's goal is to help us take advantage of relocation as an opportunity for personal growth. She does this by breaking the move into four distinct phases: separation, transformation, integration and maintenance. Those who have not yet decided whether to make a move will find Part 1 extremely useful. There are exercises to help you sort out your feelings and deal with your sense of loss as well as several identity crises: your self-identity, your social identity, and your paper or transaction identity.

In Part 2, Goodwin delves into the various phases listed above and presents more practical exercises to help you deal with each one such as a "Plan for Fear" and a "Plan for Being a Newcomer." In the Oracle exercise, you get a chance to test your psychic predictions like "I'll have more cultural knowledge but my tennis game will be shot" or "I'll drink less, eat more, and take more walks on the beach."

In Part 3, Goodwin provides information and exercises that focus on specific problems facing many movers. These chapters cover moving a family, moving along, moving out of the country, the corporate move and helping others move. While not exhausting, the exercises presented are rather time-consuming, but so if fear and stress. As Goodwin rightly points out: "Stress can distort your perceptions. A fearful, anxious person will make poor decisions, leading to more problems...Time spent worrying is time spent depleting energy that you are desperately going to need during a turbulent transition." That's certainly good advice, and Goodwin follows it up with a wealth of useful exercises and suggestion to reduce the fear and stress of moving. So, if you are planning a big move, remember: don't leave home with out "MAKING THE BIG MOVE."

The book fails to offer constructive advice about how to overcome the problems it mentions. Yes, moving can be lonely and depressing. But I expected ideas, not just soft psychotherapy.

Ideas like:

Subscribe to the new place's newspaper for a couple of months before you go;

Volunteer in the new place for Hospice, a soup kitchen, a women's shelter, a hospital, Habitat for Humanity;

Get involved in political activity, your child's school, Neighborhood Watch, a religious group;

Learn about activities in your interests before you go (classes, clubs, etc.)

Subscribe to an email list about the new place before you go.

It's possible that a few of these ideas may be somewhere in the book - in all honesty, the "pity party" tone annoyed me so much I didn't do more than skim some of it. And there's no index, a serious flaw if it does contain any real information. But in all honesty, it doesn't seem to.

I've moved a fair amount - South, Midwest and West. I can think of one move, when I was very young and immature, when this book would have been helpful. Since then, I'd say it would be just dead weight in a moving box.

I normally avoid self-help books, but this easy-to-read book is easing my anxiety from a cross-country move. I appreciate tips that I never before heard or considered -- such as how to put together an "emotional first aid kit" (including favorite photos) to help cure homesickness, or starting a new daily ritual (like getting coffee at a coffee shop) to make me feel at home in this foreign place. This book is straight-forward, peppered with anecdotes and research... and makes sense. It has been a good investment in happiness.

As a counselor of relocated family members, I can highly recommend this book as an articulate, and creative look at the difficult stages of transition. Goodwin writes about both the practical issues (how to find what where) and the emotional/psychological issues (how moving affects your identity in three different ways) creatively and with an upbeat tone that is supportive, informative, and fun to read.

This book was useful to me. I realized that I was mourning a move two moves ago! :-) Explains a lot of the emotional stuff we go through as part of a move that we may not be expecting, may not understand, other may not be prepared to support us through. This book isn't a "how-to" checklist type of book. It was unique look at moving, how to decide whether to move, steps you can take to make the move smooth and derail any possible emotional upsets. Well worth the price.

A must read for dealing with all the "extra" headaches that come from moving. I was relieved to learn I wasn't going crazy but, experiencing many of the same emotional ups and downs as many other people who've moved across country. When ever I move again I will be much better preparded. Very well organized, no need to deal with issues around moving a family if you're moving by yourself, you can go directly to the section that fits your particular situation.

As a person affected positively and negatively by several moves I was looking for help in making a decision about a "big" move. This book opened me up to many of the ways in which "place" is so important. There's more to think about than packing boxes. I've read it more than once and am still working with the questions she raises. If you're undecided about moving somewhere...read it. Definitely a unique look at the interaction between people and their environment.

This book is extremely helpful when you're planning on making a move and have children in tow. Everything from when is the ideal time to make a move to how to help the children adjust is covered. There's some great stuff in there for Mom and Dad, too, on how to adjust to your new surroundings. I wish I'd bought it before we even bought the house, but it's still extremely helpful in dealing with the implementation stage.

Not quite as inspirational as I was hoping. I will start off with the bad:
First off, I think this book would be best suited for someone who has never made a decision before, and needs to be told ten million times to calm down. I have books on calming down, so this wasn't really what I was looking for out of the book. Kind of touchy feely.
Secondly, the advice seems pretty dated. For instance, the advice to take your old phone books with you if you need to contact an old favorite store or something. These days, isn't everything on google? Who actually uses a phone book?

Most importantly, there is no mention of meetup.com, which I have found invaluable in making friends when I moved to D.C. - she says a lot of groups of people don't have time for a new friend, and I agree, and that is what is great about meetup.com, you are meeting up with people that are looking to make new friends, and not people that don't have time for you.

The good:
She makes a good point that there are benefits to having movers pack for you, because you won't waste all your time sighing over pants that don't fit any more instead of just getting things done.
She recommends planning a "major creative effort", which seems like a nice idea.
She talks about the psychology of the mover (the person who got a new job, etc.), and the person along for the ride, who kind of has to move.

Overall, the book is probably great for people with little to no experience moving, not so great if you are a young professional who has already moved a few times, and just wants some interesting ideas of how to make the new place more exciting.

Such a helpful book. I just recentely moved from Southern California to Portland, Oregon. My husband and I left family, work and friends for a new adventure here in Oregon. We don't know anybody but we are together and we love the state. We have our hard days of missing "Home" back in Southern California, friends and family and the things we were used to for so many years.. We sometimes feel very sad, very happy, so many different feelings at the same time and this books helps us understand that we are not just the only ones.. It may take 2 years to feel home again instead of being in the middle just like the book mentions. I truly recommend this books if you are moving to a totally different place...