Customer Reviews

Making a Change for Good: A Guide to Compassionate Self-Discipline

5 star:		(8)
4 star:		(5)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(2)

 

 

I have read several of Cheri Huber's books, and this one does not disappoint. She delivers compassion once again - this time relating that self discipline is not about beating yourself or judging yourself into submission to a goal, it is about loving yourself entirely. It is a guide to meditation and journaling, but really it is so much more. She gives you the tools for success in any endeavor - whatever challenges YOU. Whether it is eating right, exercising, being a more kind person, committing to meditation, or ending your procrastination the method of kindness that she allows you to show yourself is a perfect tool for attaining your goal. It is not simply a repeat of her other material. It covers new ground with the same loving-kindness that flows from all of her work. It is not too "new-agey" and regardless of ones spiritual beliefs this guide is a wonderful tool for success.

I am a personal growth coach with a background in psychology, world religions and biofeedback. I work everyday with people who are trying to change their lives, which as you know is often a tall order. I've always admired Cheri Huber's simple, practical and effective approach and this book is certainly one of her best.

Although this book is based on Buddhist thought, it can be used by anyone of any faith. It approaches change from a perspective of non-judgmental awareness, unconditional self-acceptance and seeing that beating yourself is and always has been futile.

In addition to her fine presentation of content which is gleaned from a variety of areas including cognitive therapy, Buddhist thought and developmental psychology, she provides a structure. Specifically, the book contains a guided 30 day retreat which I think it EXCELLENT in every respect of the word... that's code for it really works!

This is one self-help book that is worthy of the name. I also recommend How You Do Anything Is How You Do Everything: A Workbook, Be the Person You Want to Find: Relationship and Self-Discovery, Unconditional Self Acceptance and The Fear Book: Facing Fear Once and for All. In reality, all of Cheri Huber's books and other resources are excellent.

The paradoxical approach to self improvement. Accept yourself exactly as you are. You do not need to be younger, thinner, less abrasive, politically correct, smarter, cooler. You just need acceptance. In addition to very clear description of the issues, a practical 30 day program of "practice" is included. You do not need to leave your home and family, leave your job, become a vegetarian, or go to a cave. You just need some quiet time each day. This book is a tremendous gift.

Cheri Huber has written quite a few self-help books. If you like (or dislike) her style, I don't think you will find much to change your mind in "Making a Change for Good." Like some other books it is set in a hand-writing type font.

Reading other reviews, I saw that some reviewers are upset and others relieved that the book is so simple. There are no lengthy dissertations about complicated philosophical concepts. On the other hand those dissertations may not be very helpful to the end-user. Simple language drives home the point. Here is one example (discussing disidentification):

"I want to do something.
I do it.
I feel good.
Voices talk me out of doing it.
The same voices beat me up for quitting."

I am sure the same concept could be expressed in a manner that only 2% of the readers would comprehend :) The recipe for the antidote is just as easy to understand. A 30-day guided 30 to 45 minute a day self-retreat. It WILL work as long as one is honest to oneself. The method is sitting meditation and the clear view created in that space. Compassionate self-support will step in and recognize the "voices" that sabotage us.

I agree that all the conversation about the "voices" can turn you off. However, if we accept the word "voices" as a conceptual place-holder, the message will not get lost. And we have to say something, don't we?

We're always looking for that external thing to save us and transform us. In Huber's book, we're aided in confronting the external things that have laid eggs in our mind and influence the habitual decisions that we make daily, including addictions, procrastination, and time management.

I've found that Huber's right on track -- it starts with being still.

I liked it, because it's a quick read. i read in one hour. The basis of it is instead of beating ourselves up when when aren't so perfect, (alot of wasted energy) it's being gentle with ourselves as we keep making improvements in our character. We keep refining ourselves. That is a lifelong process (sorry I know you wanted it to happen in one day). It gives you some processes specifically in self dicipline that you make commitments to. I see so many people with so much ability, talents, who never reach their potential, because they lack the self-discipline to get there. If you struggle in this area, read this, do the excercises and I think you might find a whole new world open up to you.

I am currently on day 21 of the 30 day retreat at the end of this book and I am reporting that it has become a beautiful ritual for me to come to each day. I also really love that the process is not about "doing this" or "getting that done" - but I'm learning the difference between 'must do' and compassionate self-discipline. What happens when my deepest truth wants to do something and I delay? Who are the players involved in taking that away from me? When I am aware of the dynamic I find that I am making different choices. Now that is a compassion and clarity that I am thirsting for. Meditating for 20 minutes every day? That is not something my thinking mind would believe I could do. But I do, and I am. I am understanding what it means, the peace that passes all understanding.

For me this book provides a great opportunity to kindly take your own hand and lead it forward with love. I find that the worst possible thing that can happen when I "fail" to meet my goals is a kindness that knows no end. Wow.

I had never heard of the author, but somehow this came up when I was looking for another book and it just caught my eye. I ordered it and it was delivered the next day! Hmmm...what alot of 'coincidences' ! I read the book that evening and the next day I chose my pattern I wished to examine more closely and commenced on the 30 day awareness program. I felt it was a worthwhile exercise and I really got alot out of it. I would encourage anyone to give it a try. Yes, it reviews some theories which may be old hat to some, but I really felt that the 30 day exercise was a practical application of what you were learning. For me that was a big difference towards actual change. It's hard to describe more, as you choose your own pattern to work on so all results will be different. I also felt that her continued encouragement to 'stay with it' really helped because if you allow it - you can learn by making mistakes or by skipping some exercises. For a short book, it packs in so much potential for change.

This is a quick easy way to get inspired. If you need a boost of self esteem and to realize everything is NOT your fault, this is it. Written in "cartoon type fashion" it is a read for the people who don't have long attention spans.

If your life needs a change, you dont have the budget for psychotherapy, and you don't have time to sit down and read a long complicated book, this may be a big help to you. I was able to pick up some ideas and use them immediately. A shift in my perception became simple, and quick to produce results. Some of our lives are too hectic to become a guru. We just need positive changes that will last. You could do this on your lunch break.