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Making Love Last Forever Paperback


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Product Details

  • Paperback: 320 pages
  • Publisher: Thomas Nelson; 1st edition (September 16, 1997)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0849940869
  • ISBN-13: 978-0849940866
  • Product Dimensions: 8.4 x 5.4 x 0.9 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 11.7 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (23 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #325,820 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

In an age when the idyllic notion of everlasting love has been battered against the rocks of infidelity and divorce, ever-popular Christian counselor and writer Smalley (The Language of Love) offers his own tried and true methods for making love last forever. According to Smalley, the foundation of lasting love is falling in love with life itself. In the first section of the book, he explores principles for resolving anger, balancing expectations and reality and avoiding hurt. Using anecdotes from his counseling sessions and stories from his own marriage, Smalley fashions, in the second section of the book, a set of "forever-love" principles designed to help married couples improve their relationships. Some of the principles Smalley includes as essential ingredients for lasting love are better communication, understanding a spouse's personality type and using conflict to foster intimacy. Each chapter closes with a set of "forever-love" principles drawn from the topic of the chapter. In the end, however, Smalley's principles are not helpful because they are founded upon, and promote, conventional stereotypes of men as rational and aggressive and women as intuitive and passive. Unfortunately, only couples who accept these stereotypical gender roles are likely to benefit from his principles.
Copyright 1996 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Booklist

After only a few chapters, it is obvious why Christian marriage counselor Smalley has sold more than 12 million copies of his videos and previous books. His presentation is highly organized, so that he can summarize each chapter in so many numbered points. He speaks plainly and inculcates his lessons with anecdotes from his clinical practice and his own life that workaday Americans, especially if they are in business and the professions, find easy to identify with and which Smalley weaves cunningly together so that some stories are told all at once, while others are parceled out to create narrative suspense and make the book compelling. Details and metaphors are the stuff of the popular culture: country singers, TV shows, and computer and VCR analogies. The authorities Smalley cites come from the best-seller lists: M. Scott Peck, Stephen R. Covey, John Gray, and Deborah Tannen, among others; not until well into the book are the Bible and Evangelical Christian resources invoked. It helps that the bedrock advice here--to assume personal responsibility for one's life and to love life itself as prerequisites to realizing a happy, permanent marriage--is just that, bedrock, for the modern counseling establishment. Smalley does what he does awfully well, making this the book for staunch Christian couples and an approachable one for enough others to justify Word's confident quarter-million-copy first printing and a 30-city author tour. Ray Olson --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

More About the Author

Gary Smalley is one of the country's best known authors and speakers on family relationships. He is the author and coauthor of 16 best-selling, award-winning books along with several popular films and videos. He has spent over 30 years learning, teaching, and counseling. Gary has personally interviewed hundreds of singles and couples and has surveyed thousands of people at his seminars, asking two questions: what is it that strengthens your relationships and what weakens them?

Gary's books combined have sold over 5 million copies. Many of them have even been translated into various languages. "The Blessing" and "The Two Sides of Love" have won the Gold Medallion Award for excellence in literature. "The Language of Love" won the Angel Award as the best contribution to family life. All other titles have been top-five finalists for the Gold Medallion Award.

In the last 30 years, Gary has spoken to over 2 million people in live conferences. He has been presenting his live two-day workshop, "Love Is a Decision," once a month for the last 20 years. Television audiences all over the world have viewed his award-winning infomercial, "Hidden Keys to Loving Relationships." Several versions of the infomercial--first with Dick Clark, then with John Tesh and Connie Sellecca, and also with Frank and Kathie Lee Gifford--have been aired. This 18-videotape series has sold over 4 million tapes.

Gary Smalley has appeared on national television programs such as "Oprah," "Larry King Live," "Extra," "The Today Show," and "Sally Jessy Raphael," as well as numerous national radio programs. Gary has been featured on hundreds of regional and local television and radio programs across the United States.

Gary and his wife, Norma, have been married for 40 years and live in Branson, Missouri. They have three children, Kari, Greg, and Michael, and six grandchildren.

Customer Reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars
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It's an easy, compelling read.
Randy E. Fluhart
Highly recommended by someone who is divorced.
Janetde69
Gary is a brilliant and insightful writer.
His Beat Goes On...

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

14 of 15 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on August 25, 1997
Format: Hardcover
Gary Smalley has written an excellent book to help couples improve their marriage relationship and to give them the resources needed to encourage their relationship to grow in intimacy and the ability to weather the storms that sink too many marriages today. He starts by laying a foundation of emotional health that needs to be present for each of us to be able to be a part of a healthy relationship, and then builds with practical ideas on how we can make our marriage relationships more intimate and enduring. This book can be of benefit to individuals, couples, small couples groups, and as a resource for teaching in a larger group. Although it is written specifically for married couples, the insights that it contains are applicable to many other types of relationships as well
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10 of 10 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on December 31, 1999
Format: Paperback
This was one of the best books I have ever read. Perioid. Mr. Smalley's book really helped my fiance and I open up to each other and become much closer in our relationship to each other. It should be required reading during pre-marital counciling.
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13 of 14 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on March 10, 2000
Format: Hardcover
My aunt gave me this book to read because my father and I are having a terrible time right now. I am engaged and he doesn't approve of my fiance. My aunt thought this book would help me get through the anger I am experiencing with my father. It is great for couples, but also great for parents and children! I highly recommend this book to anyone regardless if you are married or single!
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8 of 8 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on July 16, 1999
Format: Audio Cassette Verified Purchase
I have read several Gary Smalley books as well as many other marriage books. This is one of my all time favorites because of the easy reading, interesting personal stories and chapter synopsis. Smalley's book should be a prerequisite for all couples. Get it and enjoy!
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful By Michael Taylor TOP 500 REVIEWERVINE VOICE on January 20, 2008
Format: Paperback
"Making Love Last Forever" by Gary Smalley is a helpful tool for couples who wish to have a stronger and more intimate marriage. The title is about 270 pages and contains 16 chapters. Some of the topics are:

1. How to Address Unresolved Anger.
2. Balancing Expectations With Reality.
3. Five Vital Signs of a Healthy Marriage.
4. Better Communication.
5. Understanding Personality Types (this was my personal favorite, more about that later).
6. How to Bring the Best Out of Your Mate.
7. Dealing With Conflicts.
8. Divorce-Proofing Your Marriage.

I particularly liked the chapter on the different personality types. According to Smalley, there are four basic personality types that can be characterized by animals. While each person probably has characteristics of each, one or two most likely dominate:

1. Lion - likes to be in charge and can be a bit too pushy.
2. Otter - enjoys being with people but can lack focus.
3. Golden Retriever - loyal but can be too easily hurt.
4. Beaver - consistent but can be too critical.

Smalley takes the four types, describes their strengths and weaknesses, and suggests how to deal with each type and how each type can address their own negative tendencies. A very interesting chapter.

Read the book and be encouraged and challenged to work at having a better marriage. Highly recommended!
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful By GUANGTIAN SONG on November 3, 2002
Format: Paperback
The book describes the nature character of man and woman and the feature of the christian marriage. It has test to evaluate personal character, and summary the right love on the back of each chapter. It is really a handbook for happy marriage.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Jan Honey on September 22, 2009
Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
A marriage counselor highly recommended this book to me and claimed that it helped all of his clients. I guess they'd give it five stars, but I had a hard time getting past the style of writing. I felt like I was reading a sales pitch for Smalley's other books and videos. I found the annecdotes about Smalley a bit drab and non-relevant--more like memoires written for his family and friends. The parts of the book that didn't annoy me, bored me. There is some good advice in there, but nothing novel that I haven't heard before. I did like the way Smalley described the importance of God in one's life and relationship, which is why I gave it three stars instead of two. I'm 33 and would not recommend this to my friends.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Monica Cooper on June 17, 2009
Format: Paperback
My husband and I have both read the book, and we learned so much about ourselves and each other as we pointed out paragraphs and had indepth discussions based on the author's research and recommendations. We are now better able to analyze the "rough spots" in our marriage and move upward and onward. Thank you!
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