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Making Peace with Autism: One Family's Story of Struggle, Discovery, and Unexpected Gifts [Paperback]

Susan Senator
4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (27 customer reviews)

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Book Description

December 12, 2006
Receiving a diagnosis of autism is a major crisis for parents and families, who often feel as if their world has come to an end. In this insightful narrative, a courageous and inspiring mother explains why a diagnosis of autism doesn't have to shatter a family's dreams of happiness. Senator offers the hard-won, in-the-trenches wisdom of someone who's been there and is still there today—and she demonstrates how families can find courage, contentment, and connection in the shadow of autism.



In Making Peace with Autism, Susan Senator describes her own journey raising a child with a severe autism spectrum disorder, along with two other typically developing boys. Without offering a miracle treatment or cure, Senator offers valuable strategies for coping successfully with the daily struggles of life with an autistic child.



Along the way she models the combination of stamina and courage, openness, and humor that has helped her family to survive—and even to thrive. Topics include: the agony of diagnosis, grieving and acceptance, finding the right school program, helping siblings with their struggles and concerns, having fun together, and keeping the marriage strong.

Frequently Bought Together

Making Peace with Autism: One Family's Story of Struggle, Discovery, and Unexpected Gifts + The Autism Mom's Survival Guide (for Dads, too!): Creating a Balanced and Happy Life While Raising a Child with Autism + Shut Up About Your Perfect Kid: A Survival Guide for Ordinary Parents of Special Children
Price for all three: $34.27

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Editorial Reviews

Review

"This book is as much about the very nature of parenting as it is about autism. The issues Senator raises are issues faced, in some measure, by every family, and she captures the hard work as well as the importance of enjoying life along the way. Making Peace is a book that every parent should read, for it provides tremendous insight into the mind of an autistic person, and is likely to engender compassion and understanding towards individuals with autism spectrum disorder."— Pennsylvania Gazette


"An honest, emotion-filled account of what it is like raising an autistic child, its effects on the family, marriage, and one's own test of strength."—Brookline Tab



“I hope the book succeeds in finding its way onto the bedside tables of many mothers and fathers, teachers and administrators, politicians and doctors. Regardless of whether they have anything to do with autism, they’ll learn a lot about life from Senator, Nat, and their family. What this book shows us about acceptance and love would make the world a far better place."—Timothy Shriver, CEO, Special Olympics

"Families will gain much insight into how one family successfully coped with the challenges of raising an autistic child. Mothers, fathers, and siblings should read this honest account of family life with autism."—Temple Grandin, Ph.D., author of Thinking in Pictures and Emergence: Labeled Autistic





"This is a book that every parent and professional working with autistic children should own, read, and reread. These children have such enormous potential in their own way. It is so refreshing that this family sees it too."—Margaret L. Bauman, M.D., associate professor of neurology, Harvard Medical School



"Senator's story reminds us that while there are currently no medical treatments or cures for autism, we must maintain hope."—Karen London, cofounder, the National Alliance for Autism Research



"Senator's common sense approach and courageous journey give readers a practical and entertaining experience."—Doug and Laurie Flutie, cofounders of the Doug Flutie, Jr. Foundation for Autism, Inc.



"This book reaches out to other families in a voice that inspires hope, but without losing realism. The everyday struggles are in the foreground but throughout her positive spirit illuminates a path that will make the journey easier for other families, and will help them feel they are not alone."—Simon Baron-Cohen, M.D., director, Autism Research Centre, Cambridge University

About the Author

Susan Senator is the mother of three boys, the oldest of whom has autism. She is the author of Making Peace with Autism, a memoir of her family’s struggles and triumphs. Her writing on autism has appeared in the New York Times, the Washington Post, and the Boston Globe. She has been featured on the Today Show, CNN, MSNBC, Voice of America, and NPR.
 

Product Details

  • Paperback: 272 pages
  • Publisher: Trumpeter; 1 edition (December 12, 2006)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1590303822
  • ISBN-13: 978-1590303825
  • Product Dimensions: 5.6 x 0.8 x 8.4 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 10.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (27 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #546,522 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Susan Senator is mother of three sons, the oldest of whom has fairly severe autism. Senator is the author of one novel "Dirt: A Story About Gardening, Mothering, and Other Messy Business," and two autism parenting books, "Making Peace With Autism: One Family's Story of Struggle, Discovery, and Unexpected Gifts," and "The Autism Mom's Survival Guide: Creating a Happy and Balanced Life While Raising a Child With Autism." She began her writing career in 1984, as an escape, while working on her Master's Thesis at the University of Pennsylvania. She ultimately wrote four novels, and in 1997 published her first autism parenting article in Exceptional Parent Magazine. This led to many, many articles on various aspects of autism, parenting, and family life in places like The New York Times, The Boston Globe, and The Washington Post, all of which, along with her blog, can be found at susansenator.com. Senator has appeared on the Today Show, CNN, MSNBC, and NPR's Weekend America. She was also a guest at a dinner at the White House in honor of Eunice Kennedy Shriver and Special Olympics, where she met the President. Senator's first book, "Making Peace With Autism," was given the Exceptional Parent Magazine Award of Distinction. Senator's philosophy is that it is certainly possible to have a happy family life even given the difficult context of autism -- it's just not what you might have expected.

Customer Reviews

This is hands down the best book on autism I have ever read. Nancy Bea Miller  |  7 reviewers made a similar statement
We have had very similiar experiences and emotions in our journey with autism. Karen K. Chappell  |  3 reviewers made a similar statement
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
31 of 31 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars What a wonderful, realistic and kind book! October 16, 2005
Format:Hardcover
I felt so happy while reading this book! Lately I have been reading all sorts of books about autism---after 11 years being an autistic spectrum mother, I finally felt ready to! So many of these books are about "miracle" cures brought about by parents who are incredibly focused and put "curing" their child first in their lives---before their other children and at times I almost feel before enjoying and appreciating the austistic child---it's like they only will be valued completely if they are "normal". The author of this book obviously loves her son Nat extremely much, and does so much for him, but she also ACCEPTS him. He is on the lower functioning side of the spectrum (another thing that doesn't often get written about lately) and although he makes much progress, she accepts certain things are just how he is--his silly talk, for example. I felt so encouraged about my own life and my son's life after reading this. He has Aspergers, and so we have some different issues to deal with, but we have dealt with our form of "silly talk" for years---we call it The Strange Noises---high pitched train-whistle-like squeals. I think during this reading was the first time I decided to simply accept this---perhaps try to regulate the time and place, but not to feel it had to be changed.

I really want to thank Susan Senator. It is hard to be as honest as she was here. I also have 3 children, and it meant so much to read about her worries and doubts about her other children---not to have them be an aside in the book, but a big part of it. ALL our children are important and interesting and valued!

I would call this one a MUST READ for those who love anyone on the autistic spectrum!
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32 of 33 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A much-needed corrective to the autism miracle story October 26, 2005
Format:Hardcover
How refreshing to read an unflinching and substantive account of autism that tells it like it is. Kudos to Susan Senator and to Trumpeter Books! Most mainstream publishers and bookstores have done a terrible disservice to parents of autistic children by ignoring all but the miracle cure memoirs. To a new parent scanning the special needs shelves of her local Barnes & Nobel, it must appear that autism has been cured many times over-whether by Applied Behavioral Analysis, Floor Time, the Diet, Auditory Integration Therapy, the Option Institute, or (yes, it's true!) the Mozart Effect. Only after much sweat, tears, and money down the drain does one learn what the sensation-obsessed book industry prefers to withhold: that most autistic children are never cured. Susan Senator's book is a much-needed corrective, offering practical advice instead of pipedreams, coping strategies instead of quackery, and companionship, rather than one-upmanship, in autism's many challenges.
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33 of 35 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Individual Account September 2, 2005
Format:Hardcover
This is an excellent first person account of a parent whose son has autism. Nat Senator was born on November 15, 1989 just at the time more research and information was being done on autism and its spectrum partner, Asperger's Syndrome. The oldest of three sons, Nat exhibited autistic behavior almost from infancy. His language development was delayed; he sought comfort in sitting quietly, avoiding a noisy peer ("coming even" after sensory bombardment, a common behavior and coping mechanism among people with autism) and vigorously protesting noisy guests at a family Seder.

At 8, Nat became a brother for the first time when Max was born. Their yougest brother Ben was born when Nat was 14 and Ben was 6. Max was described as the "peacemaker" and "trailblazer" who was able to interpret a lot of Nat's behavior. Ben balanced out the fraternal temperaments with his direct, forceful approach. He appeared to be Nat's counterpart as Nat was apt to retreat. Max was also described as "wearing the mantle of the oldest brother" because of Nat's great needs.

Nat was able to attend school with lots of support and made great progress. The boy's mother wisely did not buy positive reports at face value; it was she who insisted that school staff place more emphasis on having Nat make eye contact and reduce his self-stimming behaviors.

At the end of the book, Nat explained that his "silly talk," as he called it which consisted of neologisms was his way of having something he did not have to explain to others. He said that when people talked to him, their questions came at him too fast and he found that confusing and overwhelming, a common plaint among the autistic population. His way of coping was to make soft sounds including neologisms because, as he said, that gave him "something he did not have to explain to others" and helped desensitize him to overwhelming sensory input.

I like the way the family "made peace" with autism; at all times, Nat is accepted, taught and encouraged to make more strides. The John Lennon classic, "Give Peace a Chance" could be the song that underscores the message of this book.

This is an excellent book that includes good websites and addresses of organizations that work with people with autism and their families. This is a book for everybody. We need this book!
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
2.0 out of 5 stars Disappointing
I found the overall tone of the book was Anger and I found myself becoming more and more angry and short tempered with my autistic child after having read the book. Read more
Published 14 months ago by Bittersweet022
5.0 out of 5 stars Best book out there
By far the best book out there written by a parent with a child that has ASD. I cried while I read it, but it was also inspiring. Read more
Published on January 10, 2010 by C. Mcfather
1.0 out of 5 stars Make peace with your own issues
Ok, in all fairness, I did not read the entire book. After the author describes her son's birthday as being one of the most difficult days of the year, every year, I stopped... Read more
Published on November 17, 2009 by A. Sands
5.0 out of 5 stars A positive and empowering book
Like other reviewers, I also enjoyed this book because it was an honest and accurate depiction of autism instead of promoting alleged "miracle cures" or erroneously and... Read more
Published on October 8, 2009 by Anyechka
5.0 out of 5 stars Inspiring and Effective
The approach of accepting autism would have been enough on its own for me to like the book, but Susan Senator's writing is exceptional, and that is why I love this book. Read more
Published on August 31, 2008 by Tanya Savko
5.0 out of 5 stars Just starting this journey
This book was honest and heartfelt. Our family is at the beginning of our journey on the autism spectrum, but there were so many things in this book that we could relate to... Read more
Published on February 23, 2008 by E. Labedz
5.0 out of 5 stars Sue Senator gets it right
Sue Senator's autism book is not just another parent's story about facing autism. She has something to say, useful information to immpart, and she is not looking to find or share... Read more
Published on March 18, 2007 by LettersHead
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent, uplifting book!
After reading countless books on autism, mostly about theories and treatments, this book is a breath of fresh air! Read more
Published on February 23, 2007 by JPB
4.0 out of 5 stars good read for young families
This is a good read for young families first struggling with a new diagnosis of Autism. Also good for families with siblings, with advice about how to care for their needs.
Published on February 15, 2007 by Aut's mom
5.0 out of 5 stars Parents of autistic kids and any who work with autism need this
Parents of autistic kids and any who work with autism need MAKING PEACE WITH AUTISM: ONE FAMILY'S STORY OF STRUGGLE, DISCOVERY, AND UNEXPECTED GIFTS: it provides important keys to... Read more
Published on January 6, 2007 by Midwest Book Review
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