Customer Reviews

The Man You Always Wanted Is the One You Already Have

5 star:		(11)
4 star:		(2)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

THIS IS FOR VIEWERS THINKING OF GETTING THIS IN KINDLE FORMAT: The book itself is good and helpful, thus the four stars. However, an FYI, the Kindle edition is quite bad. There are so many typos, weird combination of words, symbols, etc, throughout the entire book, I had to guess at what some of the words were! It's SO frustrating, you can tell there was no care watsoever putting this into Kindle format. I would think the printed book is fine and dones't have the errors, that may be the way to go. It's sad Amazon would allow such a bad job as this.

Paula came to our church in Reno and spoke about her book and I had just recently gotten married for my first time... I had been going thru a challenge with my husbands personality and my personality....when I ordered the book and started to read about the four temperaments - it just clicked and wow I was just amazed - I am so thankful that Paula was able to use the wonderful gift that God gave her of writing and use it to help marriages...Thank you Paula

Recycling your marriage is a novel concept in this day of wide-ranging disposables; everything from diapers to dinner plates are designed to be tossed in the trash. The frequency with which some people change spouses indicates that many have extended that idea to relationships as well. And, if we personally haven't, then we've become very accepting of those who do, which also helps to promote it. This is not to say that divorce is never acceptable --- merely that there may be other alternatives when a relationship seems "used up."

Paula Friedrichsen is a freelance writer who speaks at women's retreats and conferences. Her insights and commentaries can be heard on Christian radio and television. Now she has taken her experiences and put together an inspiring self-help book that may begin to help reverse the pervasive trend of divorce-as-the-solution-to-relationship-problems.

The author writes from the heart of a woman who has been transformed by the Grace of God. During the early years of her marriage, Paula and her husband Jeff had moved to a new town. Jeff was not a Christian at the time, so Paula went to church by herself and soon got caught up in its activities and the teachings of its dynamic pastor. Need I say more? The closer she got to the pastor through services and projects, the further away she grew from her husband. The better the pastor looked, the worse her husband looked by comparison. While the "affair" was never consummated, its effects were far-reaching. The pastor was asked to relocate, and the damage done to the church was, in many ways, irreparable.

As a result of this experience, Paula came away with many truths, and these have formed the framework for this exciting little book. Sometimes, an author's list of truths may sound obvious, and often it's because we have heard them before but have never incorporated them into our own thinking. The Biblical truths that include forgiveness, honesty, trust and love are familiar, yet many continue to struggle with them.

Included among the interesting chapters is a segment on the Four Temperaments. This concept dates back to Hippocrates, who attempted to explain human behavior with his theory of four distinct personality types. It remains a great tool in helping us to understand and appreciate the differences in the personalities among us. Rather than dwelling on our mate's weakness, we can begin to focus on his/her corresponding strength.

Paula Friedrichsen has tackled a distressing problem that faces believers as well as society in general. Through her transparency and clearly stated insights, she has provided a tool for those who would choose to save their marriage rather than abandon it at the first sign of "wear and tear." THE MAN YOU ALWAYS WANTED is full of helpful encouragement and will provide hope to those who may be growing cold toward their marriage.

--- Reviewed by Maggie Harding

I first heard about this book on a Christian talk radio show. I am not a reader, however the titled intrigued me. I am a recent newlywed and was struggling to adjust to my new role as a wife, life, and role within the marriage. The struggle truly was a fight within myself to be the best wife, FAST! What I gained from the book was that being a "perfect wife" is a lifetime process. Everything Paula talks about in the book is real life "stuff" that every woman encounters on a daily basis so you can really relate to all the stories. If you want to have a successful, happy, and loving marriage, I would highly recommend you read this book. I carry it in my purse to read some of my favorite passages. One last thing, at the back of the book is the author's personal email. After I finished reading the book I emailed Paula and she replied back with amazing advice that I will cherish forever! Thanks Paula for a wonderful book.

I loved this book, and the author does a good job with assisting you in looking at your husband in a new light. It helped me to find ways to fall in love with him all over again!

I am still reading this book but have found it enjoyable for the most part. It is easy reading and is good food for thought. There are a few things I am not sure I totally agree with but that is just a difference of opinion, and still gives you something to think about.

Having reached the 'empty nest' stage in my life I am finding this helpful just as a reminder to constantly be aware of my marriage, and my partner as a person. As we struggle to remember the initial attraction and rebuild the fire, this book is there to gently lead me to look in the right direction.

I would recommend it to others.

I heard the author on an edition of the Focus on the Family radio show. She talked about watching her husband, who was sitting on the couch without a shirt on, hunched over and clipping his toenails..... or something like that...... and her almost-repulsed thoughts about the "big lug who sleeps next to her at night." Not such a Prince Charming moment.

Have you ever wondered just how green the grass is on the other side? Maybe you've already hopped the fence; or maybe your feet are firmly planted in your own yard. Either way, if you are a married woman, your marriage will no doubt benefit with the flip of each page of this masterpiece. Paula Friedrichsen uses her personal experience of a "too-close relationship" and the wisdom she gained from it to help the rest of us. I can't say enough about it. This book will keep you in check and give you an attitude adjustment in your marriage. You'll want to have a highlighter in one hand as you read because there are so many "WOW" nuggets that you'll want to look back on. I am so thankful to Paula for reminding me and teaching me what a Christian marriage should be and how much it needs to be FOUGHT for! If every woman could only read this book and heed the biblically-based principles, our world would be in much better shape.

I think the last paragraph in her introduction does a great job in summing up the book:

"Along with the realization of this blessing that has been right under your nose all along, joy bubbles up from a place long dormant. You are renewed, and your marriage is renewed, too. With your new lens, you'll see that even in an imperfect world, with an imperfect guy, living out an imperfect marriage--you serve a perfect God. A God who delights in making all things new... who delights in reminding you of His blessings. A God who shows you plainly that the man you always wanted is the one you already have!"

THANK YOU, Paula, for helping me to see that the grass at my house is the greenest of all!

The Man You Always Wanted Is the One You Already Have is a wonderful book that all married women should read whether they think they are already married to their Prince Charming or not. Paula Friedrichsen shares from her own personal experience in her marriage and how a relationship that started out innocently at first soon became inappropriate, almost destroying her marriage. She was given a new "heavenly perspective" for her husband after everything was brought out into the open and shares some wonderful biblical insights on how we too can begin to see our husbands with new eyes so we can keep from going down the wrong path in our own marriages.

It is wonderful how the whole book helps us appreciate and view our husbands, imperfections and all, from a "heavenly perspective" because so much of everything else we read and watch tells us differently.

In this book Paula challenges us as Christian women to rise above our emotional response, and choose to do right by our husbands, by honoring God and what he has called us to as wives. It reads like a conversation with a good friend with honest stories, insightful personal trials, scripture and well put humor.

This book will give you the tools you need to help you grow into the wife God has called you to be, which will in turn bear the fruit of a blessed, lasting and happy marriage.

Paula Friedrichsen lays it out very clearly in this book about how, as Christian wives, we should look at, honor, and better serve our husbands. Her writing is filled with such tangible honesty that I found myself walking beside her, often holding my breath, as she took me through a series of events that changed her life. Her openness to share all the intimate details brought me right into her world and her fresh sense of humor made me laugh through it all. Whether you are newly married, married thirty years, or just hoping to be a wife one day, I would recommend you read this book. Paula's insight overflows with seeds of wisdom. Take them, plant them, and then glean from the harvest for years to come.