Manic: A Memoir [Hardcover]

Terri Cheney (Author)

Book Description

Release date: February 5, 2008

"I didn't tell anyone that I was going to Santa Fe to kill myself."

On the outside, Terri Cheney was a highly successful, attractive Beverly Hills entertainment lawyer. But behind her seemingly flawless façade lay a dangerous secret—for the better part of her life Cheney had been battling debilitating bipolar disorder and concealing a pharmacy's worth of prescriptions meant to stabilize her moods and make her "normal."

In bursts of prose that mirror the devastating highs and extreme lows of her illness, Cheney describes her roller-coaster life with shocking honesty—from glamorous parties to a night in jail; from flying fourteen kites off the edge of a cliff in a thunderstorm to crying beneath her office desk; from electroshock therapy to a suicide attempt fueled by tequila and prescription painkillers.

With Manic, Cheney gives voice to the unarticulated madness she endured. The clinical terms used to describe her illness were so inadequate that she chose to focus instead on her own experience, in her words, "on what bipolar disorder felt like inside my own body." Here the events unfold episodically, from mood to mood, the way she lived and remembers life. In this way the reader is able to viscerally experience the incredible speeding highs of mania and the crushing blows of depression, just as Cheney did. Manic does not simply explain bipolar disorder—it takes us in its grasp and does not let go.

In the tradition of Darkness Visible and An Unquiet Mind, Manic is Girl, Interrupted with the girl all grown up. This harrowing yet hopeful book is more than just a searing insider's account of what it's really like to live with bipolar disorder. It is a testament to the sharp beauty of a life lived in extremes.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Cheney, a former L.A. entertainment lawyer, pointedly dispels expectations of a safe ride through this turbulent account of bipolar disorder. With evocative imagery—time-shuffled recollections meant to mirror her disorienting extremes of mood—Cheney conjures life at the mercy of a brain chemistry that yanks her from soul-starving despair to raucous exuberance, impetuous pursuits to paralyzing lethargy. Caught in a riptide of febrile impulse, she caroms from seductions to suicide attempts while flirting recklessly with men, danger and death, only to find more hazards in the drastic side effects of treatment. More than a train-wreck tearjerker, the memoir draws strength from salient observations that expose the frustrations of bipolar disorder, from its brutal sabotage of romance and friendship to the challenge it poses to the simplest emotions, such as the terrors of being happy that augur mania's onset. Though she sustains an ominous mood and relays horrifying incidents with icy candor, Cheney lightens up at times, as when she marvels at the ease of masking her condition at an office that brings out everyone's manic side. But the narrative hopscotch frustrates readers' need for grounding and context that might clear up Cheney's muddled history and satisfy readers' urge to learn the fallout of her impulse-driven episodes. Her startlingly lucid descriptions of illness merit a more concise chronology. (Feb.)
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Review

“Cheney’s chilling account of her struggle with bipolar disorder brilliantly evokes the brutal nature of her disease...Edgy, dark and often cynical, MANIC is not an easy book to read, but it has heart and soul to spare.” (People )

“Written in episodic chapters that mimic the ups and downs of bipolar depression—hypomania, mania, depression—Cheney’s book is a gut-churning ride.” (Los Angeles Times )

“[a] gritty, vibrant, memoir brings this chaotic frenzy to life...through disaster and despair to end in hope. ” (Peter C Whybrow MD author A Mood Apart )

“This is a poignant and compelling memoir ...The writing is outstanding, the story is gripping.” (Dr. Lori Altshuler, Director of the UCLA Mood Disorders Research Program )

“Cheney brilliantly brings us along on her haunting and riveting journey of bipolar disorder. ...MANIC is extremely powerful.” (Andy Behrman, author of Electroboy: A Memoir of Mania )

“Filled with gorgeous writing...Echoes of William Styron abound.” (Demitri F. Papolos. M.D. and Janice Papolos, authors of The Bipolar Child )

“[Manic is] more than a train-wreck tearjerker, the memoir draws strength from salient observations…startlingly lucid descriptions.” (Publishers Weekly )

“Cheney...writes with passionate clarity about depression and the lure of suicide but with especially keen intensity about mania...” (Boston Globe )

“Superb...Cheney’s remarkable chronicle of her painful odyssey is as eloquent as it is brave. It is also profoundly necessary, both for her and for us.” (Providence Journal )

“Amazing and powerful...[MANIC] forces the reader into Cheney’s bipolar world, into her deep and fearful depressions mixed with her giddy, high-flying manic moods.” (Orange County Register )

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Hardcover: 256 pages
• Publisher: William Morrow (February 5, 2008)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0061430234
• ISBN-13: 978-0061430237
• Product Dimensions: 5.9 x 1 x 8.6 inches
• Shipping Weight: 12.8 ounces
• Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (125 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #164,089 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #44 in Books > Biographies & Memoirs > Specific Groups > Special Needs
  • #46 in Books > Health, Fitness & Dieting > Mental Health > Bipolar

More About the Author

As a successful entertainment attorney in Beverly Hills, Terri represented the likes of Michael Jackson, Quincy Jones, and major motion picture studios. But beneath her seemingly flawless façade she was struggling with a dangerous secret: ever since childhood, Terri had been battling a debilitating case of bipolar disorder.

Despite wild mood swings and repeated suicide attempts (the earliest at age seven), Terri managed to keep her condition secret from everyone - but at a terrible price. Finally, in an effort to save her own life, she wrote a searing account of her mental illness. Manic: A Memoir quickly became a New York Times bestseller, was optioned by HBO, and translated into eight foreign languages.

Following Manic's publication, Terri received hundreds of emails from parents of bipolar children, asking about her own childhood. In response, she wrote The Dark Side of Innocence: Growing Up Bipolar - a groundbreaking personal portrayal of the emerging phenomenon of childhood bipolar disorder.

Terri's writings and commentary about bipolar disorder have also been featured in the New York Times, the Los Angeles Times, the Huffington Post, NPR, PsychologyToday.com, and countless articles and popular blogs.

Terri now devotes her advocacy skills to the cause of mental illness. She is a member of the Board of Directors of the Saks Institute for Mental Health Law, Policy, and Ethics at USC, the Honorary Board of Directors of the International Bipolar Foundation, and the Board of Directors of Project Return Peer Support Network. She also served on the Community Advisory Board of the UCLA Mood Disorders Research Program. In recognition of her public service, she received an official commendation from the County of Los Angeles, as well as the annual Advocates Award from Mental Health Advocacy Services, and the 2011 Imagine Award. She founded and facilitates a weekly mental health support group at UCLA's Neuropsychiatric Institute.

Terri graduated with honors from Vassar College, and attended UCLA School of Law. She currently lives in Los Angeles.

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

116 of 121 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars Captivating look into the mind of someone with manic-depression February 5, 2008

By Beth Cholette #1 HALL OF FAMETOP 50 REVIEWERVINE™ VOICE

Format:Hardcover

In MANIC, author Terri Cheney provides a fascinating glimpse into the experiences of someone suffering from Bipolar Disorder, AKA manic-depression. Rather than to narrate her story in a chronological fashion, Cheney presents each chapter as a stand-alone vignette from the chaos that is her life. Furthermore, each of these individual stories serves to highlight a particular insight, from the depths of depression which prompt a suicide attempt to the fine line between the joys of hypomania versus the craziness of mania itself. Cheney does tend to repeat herself a bit--for example, she names several different medications as the "one" that finally helped her and claims various depressive episodes to be the "worst" she ever experienced. Overall, however, from the perspective of both a psychologist and an avid reader, I felt that a sense of truth and candidness permeated Cheney's writing. This book provides a captivating read for almost anyone but should particularly appeal to the many whose lives have been personally touched by manic-depression; my overall rating is 4 1/2 stars.

97 of 105 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Accurate And Hopeful March 22, 2008

By Mel Odom TOP 1000 REVIEWERVINE™ VOICE

Format:Hardcover

I've dealt with depression and a bipolar condition all of my life. When I was younger, I didn't know what it was. At that point, it just manifested itself as a heavy sadness that would hit about every six months or so and last for about a week. Unfortunately, as I grew older and got knocked about by life every so often - especially when I got hammered through no fault of my own and didn't see the reason for it, that cycle accelerated and started lasting longer.

During those intervening years, I also pushed my writing hobby (probably cathartic in the beginning) into a full-time career. Which meant that I was forced to (and still do) live primarily out of my own head. That's not always a pleasant place to be. Too many nightmares exist there. And I've learned throughout my life where all the weak points are. When I'm in a downward spiral, I attack myself unmercifully. When I'm in an upward spiral, I can't sit still.

I started figuring out my own coping mechanism, based on materials and books I'd read. But that was only after I figured out what I was going through was different than the life other people dealt with. In fact, my first clues as to what I had to face were given to me by friends that suffered from the same anxieties and pressures.

These conditions aren't easy to deal with for the person who has them. Or for the people around them.

When I first read about Terri Cheney's book, MANIC, I immediately wanted to review it. Here was a successful person who admittedly dealt with the same issues I had, but I didn't know how honest she was going to be about those problems.

After reading Cheney's book in a single sitting (because I was mesmerized at watching a train wreck in motion and thinking how similar our strategies for self-destruction were), I have to admit that I couldn't find a single pulled punch. Cheney lays her life out there for inspection and offers no apologies for it. I have to admit, in a lot of ways she had it worse than I did. I had kids at an early age and couldn't allow myself to go full-tilt down some of those dark passageways that she explored. I think they were my anchor, though I know that isn't always the case for everyone.

Chaney's book describes her failed relationships, her attempts at chemical and electroshock therapy, her moments of self-discovery, and the seeming impossibility of merely coping in ways that I immediately understood. I don't know if laymen will truly appreciate everything she's done because you have to walk a mile (or several years) in our shoes to know how huge that mountain is to navigate.

People who have never dealt with bipolar tendencies or depression, or never had to share their lives with someone that did, probably won't understand everything Cheney writes about. Even without that insight, though, she tells a compelling story. And as every bipolar person is subject to doing, she jumps around in her narrative. I'm also ADHD and I'm willing to bet Cheney is to a degree as well. That's part of the creative mind as well, and part of what allows us to function at a high level on our own.

I loved this book. It's a savage song of survival, and a rebuttal of conventional life. The average life would be a wonderful thing, but it's not attainable by everyone. Cheney's book may not celebrate that, but she acknowledges it.

Whether you read for understanding, or just a voyeuristic interest in peeking into someone else's life, MANIC is heart-wrenching and a definite gut-check for those who don't realize how good they have it. I don't know if Cheney plans any more books, but I'll definitely be in line to pick them up if she does.

90 of 102 people found the following review helpful

2.0 out of 5 stars Not as deep as a movie of the week April 15, 2008

By Book Junkie

Format:Hardcover

I read this book hoping it might prove worth passing on to family members as an insightful look at one person's struggle with bipolar disorder, since I was diagnosed with the same condition more than a decade ago and explaining it (without actually writing my own book) is nearly impossible. But Cheney's egomania (I can't count the number of times she referenced her beautiful red hair or how thin she is) is so pervasive, it takes away from her credibility when addressing a condition whose extremes overwhelm any sense of vanity. Her descriptions of suicide attempts are more about dramatic presentation than what triggers the death wishes. And even in retrospect, with the aid of proper medication, Cheney seems proud of her claims that she was a virtual Joan Collins when manic, captivating and seducing any man who crossed her wicked path. I'm not saying she's the new James Frey, exactly, but I'm not buying it, either. And I sure hope people don't use this as a resource for learning about bipolar disorder, since they'll wind up thinking we're all self-indulgent, spoiled brats. Too much pomp, not enough circumstance.