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The Manly Art of Seduction, How to Meet, Talk To, and Become Intimate with Anyone Perfect Paperback – November 4, 2009
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The Manly Art of Seduction, How to Meet, Talk To, and Become Intimate with Anyone by Perry Brass Despite the more salacious connotations of the word, seduction can be an art form, believes author Perry Brass. Just as an artist lays out the colors on a palette before he can begin painting ...a good seducer knows that only by arranging the right setting and being in the right frame of mind, can the seduction take place without stalemating into a cold, awkward, and unnerving situation, he writes. Although some artists are born with innate talent, others must develop their raw skills and confidence with careful practice and guidance. Similarly, fledgling seducers will find Brass' mentorship invaluable, as he details the sometimes-rocky paths to intimacy and the difficulties that crop up in flirtatious encounters. The guidebook is aimed primarily at gay men, but Brass (author of How To Survive Your Own Gay Life) keeps his advice broad enough to be applicable to straight women as well. Because he delves so deeply into the male psyche, it might be challenging for a straight male or lesbian reader to use all of his insight, but there's still plenty of wisdom for those readers as well. Brass argues, quite effectively, that seduction isn't about ending between the sheets with someone, even though that might be the outcome. Instead, a truly creative and successful seducer understands how to make a genuine connection to others, and how to develop a sense of intimacy quickly. Although he touches on common advice like tapping into shared interests, Brass also explores deeper concepts like valor and territorialism, and his stunning chapter on rejection should be a must-read for everyone in the dating scene. Most of the time, men are not rejecting you, he writes. They're rejecting a situation they feel they can't control, and the fact that you are bringing more stress (and lack of control) into either a socially or sexually-charged situation. To make the material even more usable, Brass includes a worksheet type of section at the end of every chapter. For example, for the rejection chapter, he asks the reader to list a past rejection, and how he or she might view that person now. Only by thinking about the full circumstances of the rejection can someone move on, Brass believes. Filled with useful, practical advice, this guide is likely to make gay men feel more in control of their chance encounters, and boost some self-esteem as well. Everyone can learn the art of seduction, as Brass notes, and he provides plenty of the necessary tools and art supplies. Review Date: January 2010. Reviewed by: Elizabeth Millard --January issue of ForeWord Reviews Online
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Top Customer Reviews
I found the book good in that it advocates a sense of agency, and gives some tools for making this easier. However, while I think most of his advice is good, some of it, if put in practice, would be rather off-putting. For example, he cites sample conversations in which he advises the reader to doggedly persist after being very obviously and definitively shot down. I have been on the receiving end of many such approaches, and I find the experience rather repellent.
So overall, a helpful read, but use some common sense.
It didn't take long to realize that my inexperience and nervousness drove me toward being too forward, trying too hard to be likable, and saying so many things - and making so many moves - the wrong way. I believe that if I'd read this book and taken it to heart before that date, Mr. Promising and I would have met at least one more time. If nothing else, I would have known how to read any signs he might have given off during our first date. It also gave me some insights into my own personality that really need some work.
If only the the author had included advice on how to get a guy to consider a "reset" after a bad first date!
This book was amazing. I had only been thinking in terms of what a woman goes through when dating, and never considered what it was like for men. It turns out I was scaring the hell out of men NOT because I was a bitchy harpy (my biggest fear) but because I did not understand anything about men.
The book has changed the way I interact with men, and helped me see that it is indeed ok to be vulnerable and open to the RIGHT men. I have recommended this book to many people, gay and straight, and it has changed their relationships with men as well.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
There are no words for how bad this book is. I never bash anything (if you dont have anyting nice to say, etc) but please save your money, do some more homework there are way... Read morePublished 12 months ago by Michael Roche
Book received and a good read. Thought the concepts were well thought out and explained in enough detail to be understood.Published on January 30, 2013 by Ehahlil
If you have any common sense at all, you already have everything this book has to offer. For those that got something out of this book, good for you. Read morePublished on June 14, 2011 by Kindle Customer