- Paperback: 858 pages
- Publisher: Example Product Manufacturer (2005)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 0739462172
- ISBN-13: 978-0739462171
- Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 6 x 1.7 inches
- Shipping Weight: 2 pounds
- Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars See all reviews (63 customer reviews)
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,506,470 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Miss Manners' Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior- Freshly Updated Paperback – 2005
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Top Customer Reviews
In short, Judith Martin is more pragmatic than many people give her credit for. People who want only to "do the right thing," wedding-wise, are sometimes unfortunately in thrall to the stereotype of a Hollywood film wedding, "circa 1948." If the numbers and relative sizes of the ushers don't match those of the bridesmaids, well, better to work something out than adhere to a strict model that was idealistic and perhaps a touch bogus to begin with. Miss Manners is against all this "pseudo socializing" at work, especially when people get nickled-and-dimed to death for gift recipients they barely know; but she's for uniforms on kids because otherwise they would look "so drearily alike" in their t-shirts, jeans and sneakers. She's against the kind of complicated and expensive stationery kit that bills itself a "stationery wardrobe"; note cards and letterhead are plenty for most of us, she avers, and don't waste money on preprinted "thank you" cards. Soon-to-be-married couples who suggest that they prefer money to presents deserve neither, in her estimation, especially if it's a second marriage. And she makes each case -- and so many others -- with ironclad logic and penetrating wit.Read more ›
There is no topic Miss Manners won't discuss, although often with a quirky retort that makes you smile, as she tackles every possible topic, including children's manners, basic courtesy for all ages, conversation (especially on those ubiquitous cell phones!), houseguests, rites of passage, engagements and weddings, employment interviews, invitation etiquette, life after divorce and even bereavement. There is virtually no problem ignored and help for every etiquette concern. Let's face it, life has gotten complicated the last few years. It's a real comfort to have this impressive volume, over 800 pages, of Miss Manner's guidance on the family bookshelf.
"Etiquette is not for amateurs" and Miss Manners is adamant about the difference between "being pushy and being a pushover". How do you respond appropriately when having lunch with a "friend" who talks on a cell phone all through the meal? Is it all right to send a thank you note via email? The truth is, we're all in this together. The only reasonable thing to do is treat each other respectfully and resolve those irritating little behavioral problems we all share. Like a favorite non-judgmental aunt, Miss Manners offers her insightful suggestions, guaranteed to save wear and tear on our already fragile psyches. Luan Gaines/2005.
Miss Manners covers cell phones and laptop computers. She lets us know that etiquette does NOT require that we agree to be put on hold when we phone a business and are asked, "Would you hold, please?" or that we leave a message when our call is routed to voicemail. (Hanging up on a machine is not rude, she assures us; it's not the same as hanging up on a person.)
Particularly helpful to me are the author's suggested ways of saying "no" politely--for example, when declining to enter into conversation with someone seated next to you on a plane or declining to donate money to a charity when someone phones to ask for money. Main take-away point: apologize ("I'm sorry. . . ."), and say "no" firmly, but do NOT offer any excuses (truthful or otherwise), which is where, she tells us, we are apt to get ourselves into trouble. If pressed, there is always a polite way to cut off the conversation, such as, "I'm sorry, but I never discuss my personal finances" or "I'm sorry, I'm not up to conversation right now."
This book is not just one that deserves to be purchased and read; it deserves to be read cover-to-cover and then referred to again and again.
Recommended most highly.
Brava, Miss Manners!
Most Recent Customer Reviews
If Judith Martin were not married, and I were to want a wife, I guess I'd have to put her on this bachelor's list. Read morePublished 4 days ago by Notinthepen
I read the book around 1983 or so, and I've carried the gentle lessons in my heart ever since. I'm a guy now 66 yrs old; I read Emily Post way back in the day, so none of it was... Read morePublished 1 month ago by Fredrick Upchurch
The delivery was awful. Much as I would like to wade through it to get the content, I couldn't make it past 10 pages.Published 6 months ago by Isis
I used this in my middle school classroom because there were so many odd disruptions. It was also a great way to get the students talking to each other and think more deeply about... Read morePublished 7 months ago by kawaiijewel
If you want to express your message correctly this is the reference for you.Published 7 months ago by Roy
Delightful! Informative and wryly humorous, this was a pleasure to read. It will serve as a great future reference when I need clarification on the finer points of proper... Read morePublished 9 months ago by Stephen D. Wick